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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

I know I'm being a bit OTT but do you think I

3 replies

Tweetinat · 08/01/2010 13:09

I know this is probably a bit OTT, but I'm just looking for a bit of reassurance that I'm not a terrible mum who left their child hungry! Or if I did, that I'm told so I don't do it again!

My 10week DS is ebf and during the day feeds every 2/3 hrs with me trying to feed slightly more frequently at night so that he'll sleep longer.

He normally goes to bed at 9ish and wakes for his first feed between 12/1 and then it's normally every 2 hrs thereafter. He never truly 'wakes' to feed but starts to make more and more noise and eventually will make one 'cry' which I know I should respond to or else he'll wake himself up totally.

Last night he woke himself up with a big sneeze at 10.30, so I thought I'd give a semi 'dreamfeed' a try, which had the effect of him going through till 3am. I must have got too sleep greedy, because when he then started making his waking noises at 5, I gave him a dummy to see if he'd go any longer... He took the dummy no probs but started making kind of grunty noises and he sucked vigorously. He then did a big fart and I drifted off to sleep thinking that must have been what was disturbing him. I woke again around 6.15 and he was still sucking and making the same noises but by now he'd gone just over 3hrs since his last feed and I was exploding, so I took the dummy out and he had a massive feed - very short at 10mins but very efficient and totally drained the boob which had been v engorged.

I'm now totally paranoid that because he feed so greedily when I picked him up at 6 that he'd actually been hungry at 5 and I should have fed him then. DH thinks that if he was truly hungry he would have spat his dummy out and cried and that I should have actually left him longer to see when this was rather than just put him to breast.

I don't know what to think! How long is the max I should leave him between feeds at this age if he's not actively 'asking' for food? Did I do wrong to give him his dummy or should I have fed him? Whilst sleeping through the night would be fantastic, I don't want to 'force' this if he's not ready and very happy to keep feeding more frequently if needed.

Very long post for a relatively simple question - hoping someone can offer insight!

OP posts:
Tweetinat · 08/01/2010 13:10

Whoops. Meant to change the thread title before I posted and now I can't edit.

OP posts:
lizziemun · 08/01/2010 13:13

I'm with your dh on this. If he was hungry he would have let you know.

By 10 wks both dd2 and ds had a dream feed at 10.30/11 ish and slept through until 5.30/6amish. Where as dd1 would fed at 7pm then go through to 3am then sleep untill 6am.

tiktok · 08/01/2010 13:33

It's normal to feel protective of our babies and to worry if we have left them upset/hungry/thirsty/needy without our response.

Babies don't just bf because of hunger or thirst anyway; they bf because they want to be close, to check in with mum, to settle back to a lovely sleep.

I think he probably would have fed if you'd offered at 5 am, but...a healthy, thriving, growing, well-loved and cherished 10-week-old will certainly cope with the occasional 'missed cue' with no ill-effect whatsoever

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