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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Anyone with a bf baby who fed to sleep- what did they do when they went to nursery?

36 replies

Hulla · 05/01/2010 16:24

DD is 11.5 months, still bf during the day but this is mainly at naptime. She feeds at night and before we get up (co-sleep). I am really worried about her starting nursery this week.

How will she fall asleep at nursery? Does anyone else have experience of this? What did your dc do?

She doesn't drink expressed milk (perhaps I don't heat it enough or too much?) but she will sip at warmed cows milk. She'll be away from me for 3 days so I'm thinking of sending her with cows milk. I don't want her to be hungry and cows milk has to be better than nothing?

If anyone has any advice I'd be grateful. Settling in session no. 1 tomorrow!

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 05/01/2010 16:28

yes, exaclty the same, DS a bit younger and I fretted so much but it was fine. It's peer pressure or the nursery drug them I think (joke!).
He only ever slept when fed to sleep or in the car, this has only changed very recently - he's almost 3

CMOTdibbler · 05/01/2010 16:28

DS always fed to sleep with me when a baby, but happily went to sleep for nursery. They worked it out themselves, and he had a muslin to cuddle there (looked at me like a loon if I offered one at home though).

You might find she would have a bottle or sippy cup at nursery as the others in her room do too

At 11.5 months, having a bit of cows milk in the day, three days a week is fine. After all, she could have no other milk than cm in 2 weeks if you had so chosen.

BertieBotts · 05/01/2010 16:30

First thing to do - ask the nursery. They will definitely have had this situation before.

From what friends have told me, most babies behave completely differently at nursery, even on things like feeding and sleeping which are the battlegrounds for the parents!

StealthPolarBear · 05/01/2010 16:32

yes, exaclty, all the babies sleep at the same time (well I think the odd one has a story read while the rest sleep). It's like a cult!

Poledra · 05/01/2010 16:33

My CM could get my DD1 to go to sleep in her cot on her own months before I ever did. In fact, I think DD1 was in a big girl's bed before she would stay on her own at home!

I'd ask the nursery what they suggest; DD3 fed to sleep until I went back to work when she was 12 months, and she looked at bottles with disgust and disdain. She was fine at the (same) lovely CM's.

Original poster
Hulla · 05/01/2010 16:41

Thanks so much, that's made me feel a lot better. She needs two lots of milk a day, one day will be with dh and he said he'll bring her to meet me for lunch so she may have bm then.

I have bought tommy tippee handle-free sippy cups so they can heat them. I might put cm in one and bm in the other and suggest they try bm first.

stealth & cmot - did your dc settle ok? Everyone keeps saying I should have switched to ff at 6 months and put her down for naps and I wouldn't have a problem. I know thats rubbish but it still makes me feel guilty.

Bertie I mentioned it to the nursery and the woman pulled a face (a bit like "eeek!" without the sound!) and suggested I try getting her used to a cot but it seemed a bit mean. They did say they can rock babies in a pram & then pulled the "eek" face again when I said we didn't use one, dd went in a sling . I did buy a pram a few days before Christmas though (bit slippy & snowy for the sling) and she has fallen asleep in it once or twice if you can get her in it in the first place.

OP posts:
Original poster
Hulla · 05/01/2010 16:43

I might also tuck a muslin or teddy in my clothes for a bit so it smells a bit of me (not in a bad way) and send her with that for her naps.

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 05/01/2010 16:46

settle as in in general?
No, but we had huge problems with his first nursery and ended up moving him after 6 weeks. He settled into the second one fine.
I have to say your nursery's attitude sounds a bit worrying though

Original poster
Hulla · 05/01/2010 16:47

Lol@ cult!

Thanks Poledra, I suppose they'll have dealt with this tonnes of times won't they? The guilt of going back to work is spoiling my last few days. Gah!

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StealthPolarBear · 05/01/2010 16:48

do you mean pushchair rather than pram? DS would ahve fought his way out of any pram after about 6 months

StealthPolarBear · 05/01/2010 16:49

OK, a very cute cult Lots of sleeping babies / toddlers, lots of favourite comforters

Builde · 05/01/2010 16:51

Our nursery had to sort out the sleeping for most of the babies because most of them had been BF.

They generally cuddled or rocked them to sleep and then placed them in a cot.

Original poster
Hulla · 05/01/2010 16:53

Oh yes, pushchair. It's rear facing which seems to help but, at the doctors yesterday, I had to bribe her back into it using raisins. It was quite embarrassing. She does that straight-legs-back-arms thing kids do when they don't want to sit. Good luck nursery!

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CMOTdibbler · 05/01/2010 16:54

DS went to nursery at 4.5 months, fully bf, only had the very odd bottle, in cloth nappies, and with no routine. He settled really well, never did have a routine with naps and milk (nursery did demand feeding, and naps as needed until he graduated to toddlers where they all napped at the same time), and did BLW.

The nursery he was at as a tiny baby were happy to use slings, and there was often a baby napping in a pushchair

belgo · 05/01/2010 16:55

Hulla - my ds's nursery was a bit annoyed when ds would only sleep being held but they have managed to sort him out and now he sleeps in the cot there. I did feel a bit guilty but didn't really know what to do about it; I'm not going to stop bfing.

giddykipper · 05/01/2010 16:56

They weaved their nursery magic.

I was worried, I had no need to be. I don't know what they did but they never had any problem. I think it's mainly peer pressure.

Original poster
Hulla · 05/01/2010 17:07

I hope other babies makes it less upsetting for her.

Stealth I think you're right about the nurseries attitude. I think I'd rather dd went to a child minder but the nursery is in the grounds of my building so I can get there quickly if she needs me. We plan to move further out of the city this year so I'll look for a CM then so dd doesn't have the commute.

cmot that nursery sounds fab! Just what I'd want for dd really. This nursery has said they prefer to spoon-feed purees to under 1's but I said dd won't let them (the face again). Over 1's get proper food.

Blimey, I'm talking myself right out of sending her there. Its not as bad as I make it sound. I guess I just haven't considered nursery in my decisions as a mum (bf, BLW, co-sleep etc).

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belgo · 05/01/2010 17:10

Hulla - I also co-sleep, bf, blw etc and my children have adapted to nursery - at least dd1 and ds did, but dd2 never seemed to settle in. I don't think it was anything to do with being bf etc though, I think it was just her personality.

Original poster
Hulla · 05/01/2010 17:13

What did you do about dd2 belgo?

OP posts:
belgo · 05/01/2010 17:15

Hulla - I ended up keeping her home for most of the time - I was lucky I could do that - she was fine when she started school. She was just a very clingy, shy baby.

WidowWadman · 05/01/2010 17:35

My daughter's nursery workers asked us to leave her Mei Tai with them in the mornings and so she could (and still can) sleep in it, when she wants to. It helped her a lot with settling in.

She is breastfed, but adapted to evening and night feeds only very quickly and hardly took any EBM, but just stuck to solids during the day from pretty much the beginning (with 9 months), but I still haven't managed to stop day time BF when at home.,

Original poster
Hulla · 05/01/2010 17:39

Thanks Belgo, I guess I'll just have to see how it goes this week at her settling in sessions. Otherwise I'll have to get pregnant for another years mat leave to look after dd

OP posts:
Original poster
Hulla · 05/01/2010 17:42

Thanks WW do you find that your dd feeds more at night? My dd has a lot at night anyway, which I can handle but I am worried about increased night feeds exhausting me.

Do you still send her to nursery with ebm?

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Mishy1234 · 05/01/2010 19:27

Hulla- DS sounds pretty much the same as your DD. He was bf on demand, blw'd co-slept (still does!) and I was really worried about how the nursery would get him to sleep.

In the end they just held and rocked him and eventually he slept in a flat pushchair whilst having his tummy stroked! He never took to a cot, but now he's in toddlers they all sleep on mats on the floor and apparently he's always the first to go!

Starting nursery is a difficult time, but you will be OK and so will your DD. You would be surprised how brilliant they are at going with the flow and how easily children adapt to the routine.

Take a deep breath and good luck with the settling in. IME, it's the Mums who need the most tlc not the children!

weasle · 05/01/2010 20:57

i worried so much about this with my cling-on ds2 but it was all fine.

he went to nursery 1 day a week from 15 months. i have still never got him to sleep without bf or a car journey (he is now 2yrs) but he slept fine for nursery and has even recently gone to sleep for daddy when i am working with no problem.

ds2 used to have a cup of cow's milk and walk toward his cot to go to sleep at nursery! such a fight normally, i think he just knew sleep was the next thing after lunch when there.

he also still hates any pram; he has gone from sling to walking everywhere really.

i hope tomorrow goes well