did I do the wrong thing?

[berolina]

hello, me again...
ds tends to feed pretty constantly in the afternoons and early evenings, but go for longer at night (sometimes as long as 6 1/2 hours between the start of one feeding and the start of the next ). Yesterday I had him pretty constantly on the breast a fair bit of the day, all evening and well into the night. He would stop, pull away, fall asleep etc., and ten mins later would start up again. By half past one I was absolutely shattered and gave him to dh to have a lie down - I thought of snatching half an hour's sleep. I asked dh to wake me again if he continued to be hungry. I woke up at 4 and he was asleep in dh's arms (I know, isn't dh brilliant getting up as well ) and dh sad he'd fallen asleep relatively quickly. He next woke me at 20 past 6, fed a bit and was then very sleepy, had to be woken and 'persuaded'. Is now asleep again (bliss). My question: did I do the wrong thing giving him to dh for a break, even though he would have stayed on the breast if I'd 'let' him? He really had been feeding loads and I was just so knackered, but I feel really guilty. And will it affect milk supply? (Break in feeding from about 1.30 to about 6.20).

'after much overtired wailing'

as you'll know mojo , the answer to that obviously enough is don't let your baby get that tired. I know this from my own bitter experience - ds is crap at sleeping and we really have to pounce on that first yawn.

if your post was answering mine, I'm afraid I just meant the feeds spread out of their own accord (IME). I worry about people scheduling bf - my mum did that with me and the result was her milk dried up after 3 months .

I think they settle in to their own routine

Hi CarolinaMoon,

Yes was in response to your comment Unfortunately DD's feeds didn't sort themselves out - she was born June 2003 & we had that VERY hot summer, so I just feed her in case she was thirsty. I'm hoping to get pregnant again soon, but just dread that happening, & I feel for anyone else who experiences anything that I did unnecessarily

We were fortunate that my milk didn't dry up - in fact we've just had a holiday where I cut down to just the am feed (yes at almost 2!) & now there are no more feeds...which was by choice & we're both fine.

As I said before, as long as everyone is happy with what's going on

Hi MojoMummy, yeah I know what you mean about the 'time to eat your toast and orange juice' thing... its a bit um anal! (pardon my language)

Yeah I have the Baby Whisperer Book... she is a bit bonkers! But I know what you mean, just the general idea of eating, being a awake, then sleeping... I think to be honest I probably am more in line with this one... I'm not rampantly watching the clock or anything like that, at the end of the day, if dd really wants to sleep or be awake, then she will, likewise for food too, and I know i have 2 be flexible with it... part of me likes to delude myself into thinking i have some sort of control I'm on my own, dp is in sydney until october, so I want some kind of routine for both of us really.
She seems happy (unless i take her out the bath!) and puts on weight very well, (born at 8pounds 1 and at her 6 weekcheck was 11pounds 7...)thats good isn't it?

Thank you for the advice... just don't want anyone thinking I'm some kind of 'clock watching' ogre...

Dear Carolina Moon,

Hi, um don't think much chance of milk going anywhere in a hurry... in fact most of the time there's too much and dd gets upset that it comes out too fast!
Have also been expressing milk here and there... mainly for comfort tbh, so there's always whats in the fridge or freezer for her to munch on!

Hi kateandfelicity , yes sounds like a good weight - in fact 'they' don't like babies to lay as much fat down as was previously thought. All these studies saying overweight babies turn into overweight toddlers then obese adults. As I said before, you've got to be comfortable with what you're doing.

Ref the milk coming out to fast, that's also what happened to me, it would spray out like a fire hydrant ! DD would invariably choke & I got told the positioning was wrong. Well I changed that & still it hissed out. I was using breastpads for about 5 months - again this is where scheduled feeding helps.

Oh, to do it all again

Also, so what if you're a clock watcher - I was & now I don't need, DD does it for me ! lunch by 12, milk at 2:30, tea at 5pm, milk at 6:30 & bed by 7:30. In terms of routines, I'm probably the most unconventional person going, but I have to say, routine works everytime with wee ones.

Feel free to CAT me if you want to talk more orange juice & toast

mojomummy - glad things are going well, but it is so not true that routine works 'every time'.

Scheduled feeding does not necessarily help with over supply, either.

Hi Tiktok, thanks

Interested in cirumstances where routine doesn't work though ?

Also interested in how anyone else dealt with spraying boobs ? I found the breast shells fab for collecting the milk, but that didn't get to the root of it

Hi Tiktok,
I do agree with you, theres no way that a routine works every time, for every baby... i plan 2 have more children later on... for all i know my next one could hate it and i'd have to do things completely differently!

berolina - at 6 weeks sounds like your baby was going through a "growth spurt". Mine did this around 3 weeks old and 6 weeks old and again around 3 months old - he would be on and off the breast all day, sometimes just for a quick "snack". This would last about 2 - 4 days and then he would go back to feeding less frequently.

I have a DS now just over a year old - still breastfeeds 4 - 6 a day, sometimes it's for a quick snack or purely for comfort. He loves it before his 2 naps during the day and last thing at night beacuse it sooths him and usually sends him to the land of nod !

Reading this thread reminds of the very difficult early months though, lots of breastfeeding sometimes all day and all night, DH saving my sanity by taking DS and sleeping with DS on his chest while I had a few hours of sleep on my own, etc...

I am a firm believer in sleep (DH and I are what I would call clinicial insominacs, so believe me having a tiny baby to look after has been the most difficult thing either of us has ever done).

Experince tells me that scheduled feeds for a baby that small are undesireble and will in many cases undermine breastfeeding. Gina Ford, et al are not breastfeeding advisers - I have read her book cover to cover when I was pregnant (petrified I would have a 24-hour crying baby so thought I should read some "bestselling books" like hers - what a mistake !!) and ditched it the minute I had my beautiful boy.

I do not think that schedules work for a breastfeeding baby (i.e GF suggests 3 hour feedings ? - so do you leave a baby who is hungry after an hour as is often the case to cry and cry before the next feed ??), because they sometimes like to nibble and comfort suck.

Mine did it then and he does it now. When he falls (he is learning to walk) or is upset, NOTHING will sooth him the way mummy's breast does ! i.e. breasts are NOT just for feeding. It seems to be very much part of a baby's psychological makeup to want to suck for comfort and he would rather do this at the breast than on a dummy or bottle.

I am not a hippy chick "earthmother" sort (quite the opposite I am well-known for being a hard-nosed lawyer), but my baby has taught me everything I know about breastfeeding, and that is go with his cues and trust his instinct and your own body.

The good news is that babies do find their own feeding and sleeping schedules without ever needing any kind of training or reading a single "best-selling" book !!

mine all started at 4 hours shifted to 3 and 2 did 2 hourly for a bit then kind of settled down! It can be hard work but it does settle. Around 3months they tend to feed alot and this is when some people give up or even think baby needs weaning...just keep going it passes!!!!