hurtful nursing incidents in the space of a few days, feeling a bit upset.

[chocolateicecream]

MIL phoned my husband on his work phone and asked him to ask me to BF my young baby descreatly. Apparently some of the other guests are uncomfortable with me feeding my baby (must of been talking about me). We had been invited round there for boxing day tea. Well my young baby had a cold and found nursing tricky and wanted to nurse frequently. Upset, we didn't go round. We have not seen them since and they have not made any contact (upset with them over other stuff too but this is BF post and would need to write essay!). We have not seen any family over Christmas.

A few days later an older woman walked up to me in Asda and told me that i am an exhibitionist for 'doing that' in public and telling me that i should stay at home... She was so rude and about all that i could manage was piss off you ignorent witch (taken a bit by suprise and still feeling hurt by the other day).

1, why do i have to make nursing like some kind of secrative act, i am not flashing? It is normal and I am a mammal.

2, I thought that i was being descreat, none of my husbands family have sucessfully BF, so how dare they comment on my technique?

3, why should i struggle and make nursing harder just to please others in case a bit of nipple or breast tissue may get seen?

I have been nursing for the past 4 years non stop, this is the first negative thing to happen so I know that i need to put it into perspective.

What short snappy comments do you mums have when faced with insult towards you BF?

Also, I wish mumsnet had a spell check, my spelling is so RUBBISH.

I bet it IS his Mum who has started worrying what other people might think because she herself has a thing about it! I man, i can't imagine people being so uptight that they call her on the off chance and say 'I'm not coming if your DIL will be feeding her baby'. And if they do, your MIL should protect the right of her grandchild to be fed.

OK, I know it's more of a new thing in some circles and families, but your BIL could avert his eyes, or hide HIMSELF in the toilet 'as it's just for one day'!

Anyway, your MIL can choose - have time with her gc, including them being fed - or wait until her gc are siting up using a knife and fork

I had a comedy BF incident a couple of months back. My son was premature and I have quite large boobies so I was often paranoid about exposing myself in public, anyways my mum bought me a mamascarf- wonderful invention and so I felt quite liberalised in BF in public. So me and the husband are sat at a well known amusement park and i'm sat on a bench bFing whilst the hubbie is reading a paper, and this old couple (why is it aways the old ones!) sat on a bench opposite and started tutting about "being in public" and "shameful", so my hubbie bless him picked up his well known paper and turned to page three, walked over to them, presented it to them and politely asked " would you prefer them presented this way or for the purpose they are originally intended for!!!" They walked away shame faced whilst I fell of the bench laughing!

p.s. tell the MIL to get lost, our rule in our house was if you don't like it there's the door because you'll be wanting to leave anyway when the screaming starts because someones hungry!!

So sorry to hear you've had to put up with such horrid comments when you are doing such a fab job. For every old witch who sticks her oar in, I am sure there are lots of people who think how lovely it is to see a breastfeeding mother and baby. Unfortunately they haven't come up to you and told you so, but I am sure some nice person will come up and congratulate you on doing a good job before to long. In the meantime, good for you - stuff the ignorant and rude people of the world and hold your head up high.

My in-laws were also totally unsupportive about my bf but I left it to my dh to deal with them and I think they knew they wouldn't have seen me or my dc if they made too much fuss. I think it is horrific to tell mothers to bf in the loo. for one thing it is totally impractical as I always needed somewhere to lean my arm when I bf but it is so rude. I really think you should invite them to dinner and set up the table for them in the toilet.

You need to get angry not upset. But I do understand I have been there to but it just strenghened my resolve to continue.

My HV told me it was completely unhygenic to BF in the loo as she put it " you wouldn't go and eat your dinner in the loo would you!" :-)