Anyone else feel that breastfeeding changed them?

[SmallSCREAMCap]

Might get flamed for this, but I'm now 9 weeks into BFing my 2nd baby and remembering that I feel like a different person while BFing.

I feel a mixture of good & bad changes: on the minus side, I'm more emotional & worrisome, less efficient, more forgetful, and feel I'm on slo-mo all the time.

On the plus side, I am less likely to sweat the small stuff, less concerned with the views of people who don't matter to me, more likely to say "WTF" and put my feet up, much more loving, and more deeply appreciative of art & music.

I try to take into account sleep deprivation and general life adjustment, however I remember that when I stopped bfing DD at 9 months, I had a strong sense of my lights being turned back on about 2 days later.

It's not a bad thing really, but I am so grateful for decent maternity leave!

I think it is more about being changed by a new baby rather than the breast feeding.

Ds is 5 and I'm pregnant with my second but I still feel similar to your description.

Yes, I felt like this. It's the reason I stopped at 6 months and I felt like a changed person.

Literally overnight it felt as though a heavy weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

Being a mother changed me, and breastfeeding is, for me, an integral part of that. (I'm BF 21mo DS and pregnant so unlikely to stop for some years still). Pregnancy (at least the first trimester) makes me feel all muffled and like someone's at least turned down the lights, but when I'm not tired I feel completely 'normal'.

I don't feel any different on the days I don't BF DS, so I don't know what would change if I stopped.

I thought that too, thedollshouse, but for me it really is/was at a different level. DD was a terrible sleeper until she was about 4, and I found sleep deprivation to be very different when not bfing.

Sorry to hear your experience, GhoulsAreLoud, and well done for going 6 months feeling that way.

Bit tangential to your posts but bf has definately changed me- it has made me feel very passionate about the topic and the support women get (or don't get) when trying to establish bf. It has inspired me professionally- I am a mw and only now I have bf myself do I feel I can offer women proper support. I am not saying midwives must have children and/or breastfeed to be good at their jobs, but for me, I think and hope I will be a better HCP because of it.

thankyou for asking the question... given me food for thought - first baby - 43 yrs old - b feeding horrid when tired and lonely but miraculous when well. Don;t want to give up but might have too if emotionalness doesn;t abate. On anti-depressants aswell so ds getting some of that which worries me, as does coming off them. Seems I am torn really. 1yr birthday tomorrow might be a milestone.

same as MrsMM, I work in healthcare in an admin/support role but being a mother and bfing has inspired me to get more involved in public health in general (again, in a support role) but to focus on the overall objective of public health. Am looking for a career change

Bit un-MN but a hug to Hagg. Sounds like you're going through some tough times and 1yr bf is really quite admirable and you should be really proud of yourself to have continued despite adversity. Lucky baby to have a mummy like you.

I loved breast feeding my child (even in the face of adversity). I feel though, it was the becoming a mother, with a beautiful bond to someone that depended on my totally that 'changed me'.

However, I do feel that I would not have bonded with my baby as quickly and with such strength had I not breastfed though. This is just my personal perception. I am due my second in under two weeks, and I cannot wait for the endless moments gazing down at my suckling child.

not breastfeeding per se- that was just part and parcel of the general motherhood experience: bonding and all that

but relentlessly breastfeeding a failure-to- thrive-baby has changed me for the worse: I am far more vulnerable and have never really got over the shock

also, it did for a while threaten to mess up the bonding that had started very well straight after delivery: after endless hours of struggling to feed dd and watching her get weaker and weaker, I was beginning to have dreams where she was a changeling and my real baby was somewhere else