Very very nervous about providing peer support....

[BeehiveBaby]

A close friend has asked me if a close friend of hers can ring me for support with BFing her 11day old and I am terrified but TBH, I am struggling to do it at BFing support group too. I don't know what to say and am terrified of saying the wrong thing. I have taken the LLL peer supporters course, with the emphasis very much on reflection and empowerment and never advice.

I don't know what I am going to say to this lady. Apparently LO is already 'gulping' down expressed bottles and unsettled on the breast and wanting to be latched on for very long periods of time. How do I help her get back from there without giving specific advice which I am not qualified to give? Can I help her?

Slow weight gain terrifies me too, both mine piled it on. How can I reassure mums about a challenge I haven't faced?

Would love to hear from people who feel positive about there abilities as peer supporters. Also tips for my phone call most welcome!

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Oh dear poor you.

It sounds like her LO is not bfing great due to the expressed bottles
I was in that kind of situation and wish someone had said, if you don't sort this now he/she will never bf! As I just left it (with shields) and it was not good.

Maybe direct her to pictures / videos of latching on?

If you don't feel qualified to support her, then don't. Or do so by encouraging her to get help and advice by someone fully trained in giving breastfeeding advice. You can't reassure her about weight gain etc unless you really know what you are talking about.

I hav to be truthful beehive, I wanted advice when I was struggling with BabyG. I would direct her to the helplines to be honest, if you can't give advice.

I agree - or tell her to get the dreaded health visitor round?

Thanks for the replies guys ... I certainly won't be spouting off instructions! Have given helpline numbers too.

Just wanted to say that the fact that you have these concerns says you're obviously a thoughtful, considerate and judicious person. I am sure with experience your abilities will blossom

FairMidden I agree. Good on'ya, beehive. Just being there to listen and to direct to the best source of information is really important!

FairMidden I agree. Good on'ya, beehive. Just being there to listen and to direct to the best source of information is really important!

Directing her to the helplines is probably the best thing to do, or to a group if she can get to one.

It can sometimes be helpful to just share with her what other mothers have found worked for them in different situations. One size does not always fit all, so it can help to offer a few suggestions, so that she has a few things she can try out.

If there is something you feel is glaringly obvious that needs to be done differently, go ahead and make a suggestion. If it's something you aren't sure on, provide her with other support services, as others have mentioned, and you can always let her know that you will get back to her if you find out anything that may be helpful as well.