questions about cluster feeding

[mrsjuan]

I don't believe it - I just spent half an hour typing one handed and it didn't post properly - aghhh. I'll try again!

My baby is 11 days old now and though I'm grateful that she seems to have switched her cluster feeds from 11pm til 4am to 6pm til 10 pm I am still finding this whole thing very confusing so have some questions. I'd be really grateful if you could offer me some advice on some or all of them:

1. How often do you change sides? I tend to stick to one side for an hour if she is bobbing on and off and change sides if she's been sucking well for over 20 minutes - is this ok?

1. What do you do with your little one in the short window between feeds? I tend to let her sleep on my lap until she starts rooting again. I've tried putting her down in her moses basket or pram but she lasts 5 minutes tops.

1. What about burping? I struggle with this at the best of times but when I try to burp her in between feeds she just starts head butting and rooting again!

1. Finally - how long will this last for? I am not used to being so immobile and useless for such long periods of time. My husband is being brilliant but I think he is getting a bit bemused!

I know from reading on here and from our local breastfeeding helpline that this is completely normal but I'm finding it all so new and confusing!

Sorry for the long post!

welcome to being a parent! I'm not a bf expert, but I would say just go with what your lo wants, because that's what she needs. It seems endless to you now, but it passes very quickly. Be immobile! what else have you got to do? all the housework stuff will sort itself out. but your job now is to feed her, nowt else. I wish someone had told me that.

it sounds like you're doing everything perfectly mrsjuan

as for how long it lasts, well it varies from child to child but the first few weeks are the hardest and then they gradually start to lengthen out the times between feeds.

with my 2 boys i found from 3/4 weeks i could put them down for and hour or so between feeds and that slowly improved til it was several hours.

just go with it for now, like WWM i wish someone had told me with dd that it was ok to just relax and let her control the show... we would both have been much happier!

Sounds like you're doing a great job!

1. I was told to swap sides every 2 hours - can't remember who told me this but it worked for both of my ds's

1. Both just dozed in my arms.

1. I never bothered!

1. Both of my ds's have eased off thier cluster feeding by about 3 months.

It does feel like you're doing nothing but feed your lo, but that is a great thing to be doing, and if you can go with the flow then you'll be doing your supply a lot of good (as well as your dd!)

Thanks for responses - I think I had very false expectations of breastfeeding & motherhood in general!
She had another good night's sleep last night -10.30 til 1.30 and then 2.30 til 5 and then 6 til 7. I think that's good anyway!

Another couple of questions then...

She was only 5lbs 7 when she was born & the midwives have advised me not to leave her more than 3 hours between feeds - (fat chance during the day!) but at night I think she would sleep longer. I have been waking her if she's gone 4 hours but she is too sleepy to take a proper feed so I don;t know if it is worth it? Any ideas?

How do you deal with people telling you that you need to get them into a routine? It is doing my head in!
I would obviously like her to be in some sort of a routine but am assuming (maybe naively) that this will come in time.

Thanks!

It does sound like you are doing a fab job And you are certainly not alone in having underestimated how hard motherhood was going to be. I knew NOTHING of any real use beforehand! I had cupboards full of little ironed newborn babygrows and vest and when DS1 was born at 9lbs none of it even fitted him...

WRT feeding at night, I had a similar issue with DS2. He would have slept for hours at night but I set an alarm for 4 hours and fed him then. It was important for us as he was very sleepy and would not have fed enough. But if your DD feeds well during the day AND is putting on weight well etc, then it is probably OK to leave her. On the other hand, you have nothing to lose by waking her to feed. It won't spoil her sleep for the future - my DS is now 5 months and has been sleeping through the night since about 5 weeks, with no intervention from me.

You are not being naive in assuming that a routine will come with time. I think people forget what tiny tiny babies are like, even when their own babies are still very young. And TBH you might as well find a response to the people who want you to do everything their way, whether it be BF, sleep, what they wear, eat, play with, etc etc now, because it only gets worse as they get older. Just remember that this is YOUR baby and no one else gets a say. I always say something like "Thanks but we're happy with our current plan." Don't explain or justify yourself.

Congratulations!