TikTok - help, please!

[alittlebitshy]

This is cut and pasted and amended from a thread yesterday cos I am so exhausted I don't have the energy to think how to word it again

I seem to have posted what feels like a million threads since the weekend but here goes again.

My ds (9mo) is refusing to feed. He seems to have chicken pox (dr was dubious but then changed mind) but he certainly has a raging sore throat.

He fed as normal on Sat then in the night was reluctant but did feed eventually. He refused all day Sunday but did feed at bedtime. Nightitme was a horror as i normally feed him back to sleep and we had more wake ups than normal simply because he felt so rotten Dh mostly cuddled him to sleep.

I've been expressing - so far 5 times yesterday -aim for similar today. I feel uncomfy though as I am sure the pump isn't going the best job.

He normally takes a bottle but won't atm. We got a bit of milk into him using the nurofen syringe, and he is taking some water from his sippy cup so he's not going to get de-hydrated yet.

I am terrified this is the end of bf. I have been enjoying it after a rotten start and was so proud to have got this far and did not want to stop yet. Normally ds loves it, but how can i be sure he'll take to it again?

This morning i got him to latch on holding him in a v odd position - upright, mouth in line with my nipple and he sucked for maybe 30 seconds to a minute, and just now he deigned to put it in his mouth then bit it.

My mum noticed that he has a spot right at the corner of his mouth - like a crack, so that might be causing pain

Argh . This can't be the end!? he hits me and cries when i put him in nursing postion - have given up trying in the night as it prolongs the agony.

When i express i get maybe 5oz first thing then up to 3 each time the rest of the day - so sot a lot at all (am double pumping using a v good pump borrowed form a friend who exclusively expressed). Is that enough to keep my body thinking it needs to supply milk?

waaah. Am so stressed and upset by this. Dh is away but my mu is here which helps in the day (and with 6yo dd at nighttime) but I don't have dh's normal nighttime suppoert

maybe you could try ringing one of the bf helplines? hopefully your supply is pretty well established by now and i think you are right, this is only a temporary thing.

here's kellymom and a bump for you.

Aw, alittlebitshy, poor you and poor ds.

I cant really talk about the medical side, but I think your little boy sounds poorly whatever the doc said, and you need another medical opinion about what to do. I think he may well be experiencing pain on feeding - sore mouth and throat - and maybe the doc can prescribe something for this?

Breastmilk will not cease - you will not dry up permanently and there is no reason to think he will not come back to it when he feels better.

It will help not to struggle with him and just let him cuddle in a non-nursing posit. without even drawing attention to your breasts - let him forget there was ever a bit of a fight with them!

That expressing performance sounds enough to me for you to keep ticking over - after 9 mths bf, things are more resiliant. ( It wouldn't be often enough for a much younger baby). Try not to leave hours and hours without expressing, though - once or twice at night would be good.

HTH

Dr did give antibiotics for the throat which he's had 4 doses off so far..

I have made another app for tomorrow to get a dr to take a good look at his throat and mouth...

Just been expressing but I have a hard bit in one breast. Am hoping I don't end up with mastitis or something. Also got a white spot on one nipple.

feel pretty rubbish emotionally

Glad the doc is going to take another look.

Call a bfc about the hard bit and the white spot - and check white spot in mumsnet archives.Sorry for rushed post - on way out.

Could he have an earache? Sometimes lying back is painful for when they have an earache.

went back to dr - he has sore patches in his mouth too. not sure if it is c pox or hand foot and mouth - htough that is irrelevant to the feeding issue - frustrating though as I don;t know if he has had c pox now - eek.

he took a bf in a horizonal position this morning but has refused againa ll day. Just gulped down a bottle of ebm which has made me so so sad

not in pain anymore - lots of expressing plus him doing a good job this morning helped.

I spoke to a lll day recommended by a friend who was lovely and supportive but said nothing i didn't know and was adament he'll go back to it.

I feel so unsure about this though. It has been almost 4 whole days since he fed properly - with 2 mini breakthroughs in there to give me hope for a few hours.

Should i be giving the ebm in a bottle or in sippy cup?

He is used to a bottle (though if he resumes normal service i have decided to ditch the formula bedtime feed - this has shaken me up big time) so....

Argh!!

Last night was a nightmare. I was up and down with him from 12.30 til just after 4am. Refused to feed, was wriggly (prob itchy) and was so tired but verytime i put him down he woke up crying.

Oh alittlebitschy, so very sorry to hear you & DS are so unwell!

One question: is it that he's not feeding because he's in pain when he does? That sounds like what's happening. The other thing is- they can have nursing strikes at any time- my own DS did, much earlier than this, at 4 months or so. It lasted about a week & then things got back to normal. I think you need to go with the flow and trust that things will be ok, and as TikTok says, to create good cuddly times- not necessarily breastfeeding ones. It's great that this morning he took a bf!! I'm sure that must have been reassuring. Try not to get down about the fact that he didn't bf again all day. I know bf is SUCH an emotional subject... but try to remember you're doing the absolute best you can, remember also that your supply is well established at this point & is under no danger. I also wouldn't worry too much about the bottle. My own DS, when he was on his nursing strike, took the bottle during those days, but then went back to bf fanatically. They do have the skills- especially at 9 months- to do both things, bottle and breast.

What I think is, more generally, that you need cuddles & support yourself, because obviously this experience has really shaken you up. Please do take care of yourself, it'll all be ok

thanks maria (how are you btw)?

he has fed twice today... am hopeful without being too excited just in case...

Great! It seems to be going better... Really hope it's all sorted out soon.

Am ok, have worked on our sleep problems (actually, my DS's sleep problems which were of course our sleep problems too!) & things are looking much better. Other than that, all is well.

And you? (other than the bf, obviously).