Advise for settling DS2 wk1 + 3 Breastfeeding and wont settle

[Shell001]

Hi,

Just need advise .. DS2 is newborn and having trouble settling if its wind sick or hungry he wont settle ..
Last night I tried him upstairs in our room and it took from 9ish pm until 3am to settle him ..
Should i leave him to cry or make little noises ...
Im trying to get him in a good routine as early as i can any advise for routine and when should start would be great as DS1 19 months and have trouble getting him to bed ... and is still in our bed ..

6 hours is a very long time for a newborn to go without feeding. I wouldn't expect (or want) for him to go for more than 4 hours at that age.

Can you just bring him downstairs and cuddle/bf when he needs it? Don't worry about your other DS in terms of getting into bad habits - I really don't think anything that happens pre 3 months is going to get them into bad routines but the key thing is that they feel loved and secure IMO

he is a newborn, he needs to feed little and often.
if he needs feeding you must feed him. he's just a teeny tiny baby

Sorry i was feeding also to settle ...

He is feeding every 10 - 20 minutes until settled which im happy to do .. he does fall asleep when feeding and then i put him in his pram / cot and he sometimes falls to sleep or makes noises and gets upset until i wind him / feed him / change him ..

I just cant see how you can set a routine yet and so I agree to just go with his needs and cuddles are good ..

Feed him as much as he wants, and swaddle. It can work like magic, esp if you swaddle him before a feed, let him feed to sleep on the breast them put him down.

It's very very early to worry about routines. Just try to find a way for everyone to get as much sleep as possible.

This was an absolute godsend for us - DS2 was also very hard to settlein the early days.

Thanks i think swaddling is great i just cant do it .. but i may buy these linked and have another go ..

Thanks

what you're doing is just fine then.

remember he is used to being inside you, hearing you, having constant noise and motion and being fed (via placenta). to suddenly come out into the world can be a huge shock to some babies! lol
it's fine to just feed and cuddle him all night IMO

wayyyyyy too early for a routine. you might find that he fgradually slips into one of his own (my ds1 did), or he may just be the kind of baby who doesn't do routine (like my ds2!)

right now though what he needs is you and his dad giving him tons of cuddles and feeds

oh, and cluster feeding in the evenings is very normal for breastfed babies (do a search, i know there are a few threads on it on here somewhere)

If you want to try swaddling but you're finding it hard to keep him in, try this -it works on the same principle as the miracle blanket.

Lay a blanket on a bed or floor
Lay a muslin on top, in a diamond shape, then fold the top point down about 6-8 inches, and make this edge level with the top of the blanket.
Lay baby on the muslin.
Take the right hand point of the muslin and wrap it over his arm, then tuck the end under his back. This will stop him getting his arms out
Repeat on the other side.
Then wrap the whole blanket around him

It sounds complicated but it's not. I spent the first 2 months of DS2's life virtually screaming with frustration as he would doze off then jolt awake, on and off for HOURS

The first time I swaddled him as above he slept for 7 hours straight. He's 6 months now and I still do it.

It's definitely worth a try - good luck