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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Water or dummy to delay feed??

48 replies

shish · 16/04/2009 15:10

Ds2 3 weeks old keeps on 'snacking' - taking silly little 1/2-1oz every 1-1.5 feeds for comfort. Can go every 2.5-3 hours if he doesn't do this. Saw HV today and they have said I can either give up to 1oz of water or use dummy to delay the feed so he tkaes proper feeds at longer intervals.

Has anyone used either of these methods before?? What would you advise?

Also been told to try on one of the night feeds tonight as he did little snacky feeds last night..

OP posts:

Seona1973 · 17/04/2009 08:47

I would personally try the dummy first even if it is only for 5/10 minutes or so and if he still cries then offer the feed. Are you sure he is crying with hunger? At this age hungry and tired cries sound pretty similar - if he has been awake for a while (1-1.5hours) then it is likely he is needing a sleep rather than a feed. I always liked to get ds to at least 2 hours before feeding again and tried other things first in case it wasnt actually hunger that was making him cry. I dont think you are being cruel by offering something else first (although I wouldnt use water as they really dont need it at this age) as long as you offer a feed if whatever you try isnt successful.

dorisbonkers · 17/04/2009 09:01

Your health visitor sounds like a twat.

I live in the tropics where it's 34 degrees and I've never given my daughter any water.

I have a 6 month old and I'm still feeding her that frequently. It hasn't occurred to me to delay her feeds really. What would I be delaying them for?

dorisbonkers · 17/04/2009 09:02

Sorry Shish, just read you have a toddler as well. You have my sympathy. I'd still try to ride it out without delaying feeds.

Cathpot · 17/04/2009 09:26

Hi, managed to miss you were formula feeding, sorry. Have you tried a sling? Might help you settle him and carry on playing with your toddler? Any help around for you so you can get some sleep?

NellyTheElephant · 17/04/2009 09:35

Hi, I haven't read all the replies, but I would definitely say try a dummy.

I bf my girls and am bf DS now (who is 1 week!), the girls were VERY sucky babies (and once they got to about 3 months and had the motor functions to sustain thumb sucking rarely had the thumb out of their mouths). I found the dummy absolutely invaluable in the first 3 or 4 months. They would feed well, but then still want to suck - especially about 1 - 1.5 hrs after the start of a feed (when tired and wanting to drop off - I completely agree with Seona1973 above). A quick suck on the dummy would settle and let them drop off to sleep without me putting them back on the breast (which if I did so would result in a tiny snack feed, basically comfort, before they dropped off). I find now with DS, even at just one week, that if he stays awake after a feed (a fairly rare occurance at the moment although I am trying to encourage a little bit of awake time during the day!), then a little while later (1 - 1.5 hrs after waking usually) he will start crying and looking like he wants to suck, rooting around - but he is obviously tired rather than hungry and if I pop the dummy in he'll fall asleep.

I've never really had any confusion between the desire to comfort suck (i.e. when the dummy works) and real hunger. If the girls were hungry, or now with DS, then after a couple of mins dummy is spat out and the baby cries - and is fed. No harm in giving it a go, you will soon see if it works for your little one.

LuluisgoingtobeanAunty · 17/04/2009 10:39

shish, please re read my posts, i formula fed both my babies

you can feed on demand

and you should

i would buy cartons of ready made formula, which is easier in the beginning than making up each on fresh

a sling is still useful

babies, regardless of breast, bottle or mix feeding, need feeding when they are hungry, in the amount they are hungry for. there is no point trying to stretch a new born to feed 3 hourly if they are hungry after 2 hours

a distressed, crying baby who is tired from crying will not feed as efficiently anyway

don;t expect routine or a set amount to be taken at each feed

Seona1973 · 17/04/2009 10:57

yes but just because a baby is crying doesnt mean they are hungry. She isnt trying to get her lo to go 3 hourly she is just trying to get him past 1/1.5 hours. If he does take the dummy and stops crying then chances are he isnt hungry but just wants to suck. She wont know until she tries it though.

Original poster

shish · 17/04/2009 14:54

Thank you seona and Nelly. I have tried the dummy just now and you are right - it worked. We noticed that he was just sucking on the bottle to put himself to sleep and getting very windy. I know I can't set a routine yet but I don't want to keep giving him the bottle if he's not actually hungry. I don't thik anyone got that..

I'm just a bit worried about weaning him off the dummy later

OP posts:

Original poster

shish · 17/04/2009 14:55

It also doesn't help that I am very run down with a fever since yesterday..

OP posts:

LuluisgoingtobeanAunty · 17/04/2009 15:34

fair enough if he needs to suck, but not 'just' to delay a feed when he needs one

sorry you are feeling unwell

you should get checked out , make sure there is no infection

Original poster

shish · 17/04/2009 15:45

I have no intention of denying my baby a feed. Just trying to stop the empty sucking on the bittle

OP posts:

LuluisgoingtobeanAunty · 17/04/2009 15:48

do you think he would take another ounce, is he draining the bottle and carrying on sucking, or not finishing the bottle , but wanting to suck?

Original poster

shish · 17/04/2009 19:44

Not drinking - just sucking for comfort

OP posts:

LuluisgoingtobeanAunty · 17/04/2009 20:52

well,a dummy could well help. hope you are feeling better today

gagarin · 17/04/2009 20:59

shish - do you think you have mastitis? Or did you stop breast feeding ages ago?

It's just that mastitis can seem like flu - and you don't sound well!

I think using a dummy to stretch the feed out a little is not a problem - because a dummy won't fill her up so if she's genuinely hungry rather than wanting to suck she'll spit the dummy out and squawk!

Hope you get better soon

Original poster

shish · 18/04/2009 07:27

I have been trying the dummy and it seems to be helping. As I said, I'm just a bit worried about weaning him off it later. Don't know how and when to do that.

Only tried breast feeding for the first week so I don't think it's mastisis. Got freezing cold with fever again before I went to sleep and again in the night. Thought I was just run down but niw I'm not so sure. Have got very bad pain in the side of my back too so I have no idea what it is..

OP posts:

aGalChangedHerName · 18/04/2009 07:53

3 weeks?? Just feed him. He's just newborn and he needs feeding whenever he wants it.

georgimama · 18/04/2009 07:53

Sounds like mastitis to me. You only stopped feeding 2 weeks ago, I very much doubt that your milk will have completely dried up. I would get to the GP - you may need antibiotics.

LackaDAISYcal · 18/04/2009 08:26

shish, sorry you are feeling so poorly; coping with the demands of a tenny baby are hard enough without a toddler to look after throwing illness into the mix as well.

I had a really sucky baby with my second and third who were both BF. We used to offer a finger to suck on initially and they would both let us know fairly quickly if it was just something to suck on they wanted or not. There was no mistaking when they were genuinely hungry. Also, with DS2, sucking hard on something seemed to be the only way he could get wind up (or down). Could you try with the finger initially, and if it is the case that it's sucking for comfort rather than hunger, then think about a dummy?

I don't think people are trying to get at you personally by the way, just genuinely perplexed that a HV would suggest that denying a very young baby food is bonkers. Fine perhaps for an older child, but not a three week old baby.

Re the pain you have, is it on the right side? Your symptoms have rung a bell with me as I've just had surgery to remove my gallbladder. I developed a problem with my gallbladder soon after the birth of DC3 and had similar symptoms with the hot and cold fever thing and pain on the right side just under my ribs that I could feel front and back. Felt like really bad trapped wind initially then built up to the point it was worse than contractions. A scan showed I had gallstones. It is pretty common for it to develop after having babies, so might be worth getting it checked out?

I hope you feel better soon

LuluisgoingtobeanAunty · 18/04/2009 10:17

you could have a kidney infection

you must see a doctor

are you still having the post birth bleeding? is it slowing down? or has it started up again, any bad smell to it or big clots?

really important to see a doctor, your health is important and looking after 2 small children wehn ill is impossibly demanding

do you have a partner who is helping?

Original poster

shish · 19/04/2009 21:21

I luckily have a very supportive husband. Things got a lot worse yesterday so I got myself checked and it turns out that I have a very severe kidney infection. Started antibiotic last night and am starting to feela bit better. Was really getting me down and I was feinding it extremely difficult to cope.

I have found that at times he just wnats to suck for comfort to help him fall alseep, in which case the dummy is great. He seems a bit better with it now and doesn't seem to need to use the dummy to often. I know is it's hunger instead cos he cries when I put the dummy in his mouth so I know I need to feed him.

His patterns are very errtic at the moment. today has been every 2 hours and yet yesterday was every 2 and a hlf hours. Is this likely to settle down a bit as he gets older?

OP posts:

Dillydaydreamer · 19/04/2009 21:52

If you are bottle feeding then I can see why you have that advice, however, I would use a dummy if its comfort sucking he wants and swaddle to sleep. He could be startling his self awake and swaddling will mean he won't do this.
From reading your post I think its more a settling issue.

LackaDAISYcal · 20/04/2009 16:47

shish, sorry to hear about your kidney infection . I hope that the antibiotics kick in soon.

Itmight not seem like it at the minute, but it deos get better, honestly ; they have a bit of a growth spurt around 3 weeks and can be a bit mad and frenzied in their feeding but it does settle down. they usually get into a bit of a routine by the eight weeks mark. I say usually as some babies just like to snack and others have big feeds and go longer between.

Good Luck

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