DS 8m wants to be latched on about 19 hours a day, I may die...

[bohemianbint]

...it really has made me think in recent days I wish I could stop. I have fed on demand for 8m nearly and I'm starting to feel utterly pissed off, I can't leave DS2 for longer than 2 hours, (and I've only done that about twice!) he won't take a bottle and I can virtually never get a break or any sleep.

And me a BF counsellor too, it's not good, is it. I say I want to stop but if I did it would crucify me. I just wish he could be a little bit less antisocial about it.

AHEM (uses bossy voice....)You need to start thinking about a more established routine. I know that sounds terribly selfish but at 8m your little one does not need 2 hourly feeds. You're going to end up exhausted (more than you already are if that's even possible!) and very grouchy!

As a BF counsellor you know all of this but it's different when it's your own, I know.

Have you started any solids yet?

I fed my ds for 10m but was in a pattern with established gaps between feeds which made starting solids (at 6months) much more manageable. I confess he had a dummy as comfort rather than me but it helped him settle to sleep rather than want to suck on me all the time.

If your ds won't take a bottle it's definately time to start shopping around for a cup he likes and keep trying till you win!

I loved BF and would do it again in a heartbeat but I'd have been demented by now! You don't have to stop feeding him breast milk but expressing and using it in cooking or giving it in a cup will help you get some sense of freedom back.

Good luck xx

BB does he have water with his meals? I know everything says that BF babies don't need it, but DS has a cup with his lunch and his dinner and I find that he takes fewer but longer BFs as a result. I think a lot of his 'requests' to feed during the day are just thirst - he will have a slurp or two and then stop. ~He is just coming up to 9 months so a similar age to your DS.

I know exactly how you feel about not being able to leave them for more than a couple of hours, it's so wearing - or I find it so anyway. Since introducing the water I can leave him for a few hours or just go out with him for a few hours in the middle of the day and know I won't have to feed him which I'm finding is lovely.

I am enjoying feeding him again more since doing this, also starting to get prepared for going back to work in a couple of months.

Morning,

Thank you for the replies! decaf, you are quite right, I really do need to establish some order to this madness. And Ali - that's a really good tip re the water, I will start tryign that as of now. I had the 8m check this morning which I've just had a moan about over here.

Thanks again for the advice - I'm going to try everything you have both suggested. Something has to give!

I am not a bf counsellor, so what do I know! But I bf my son until he was 2. However, I certainly moved him to 3 and 4 hour gaps, just because it's mad otherwise. You can still bf him and avoid formula or dairy as long as you like, but if you get too exhausted you won't be able to produce milk and won't want to and end up feeling horrid and frustrated and unhappy

go a bit easy on yourself

I went back to work at 7 months and expressed milk for him - but that is impossible if you are feeding every 2 hours and you'll be exhausted - is it all day and night? you need some sanity and it is a balance of his needs and yours, not just yours!

Good luck!

Thanks daisy - you're right. It has been very unbalanced, and whilst I've just got on with it in some babyhaze for the last 8m I'm now starting to think that enough is enough!

That's brilliant that you bfd til 2. I really hope mine will do that too.

I don't have any advice but just wanted to say, BohemianBint, that I hear you.

I have an early, slow to gain weight, little titch of a thing and so I've got into a habit of feeding her over and beyond any cues (such as they were) because I was anxious about her weight. Net result is that at 6 months I'm feeding her like you would a newborn, albeit one who only feeds once in the early hours.

I'm hoping (am I mad?) that when I wean her in a few weeks things will settle down.

If I can't space feeds out more I plan to introduce a bottle at that time of ebm (although I SO struggle to pump) or formula every evening so I can get a break. I have a few weddings and evenings with a friend from overseas and could do without a baby attached to me almost all the time.

No advice but I have a... 6 day off being 8m old who is a pretty constant feeder too. I have to take driving lessons soon and have no idea how he is going to cope for 2-3 hours I am sure DS1 wasn't like this...

i have one of these ultra-feeding models too. (8.5 months)

i think they can actually cope better than we might think when mummy's boob isn't around, especially once they are on solids.

but mine will take a bottle, and loves his food, so is easily distracted as long as I'm not in the room.

BB I saw your other thread and the bonkers advice from your HV - you ok?

Thanks Ali - feeling a bit better today thanks to everyone here! It gave me a real wobble, just because how I'm doing things isn't working for all of us - but I didn;t want to believe she was right.

Thanks for checking up on me, that's really nice of you.