Why is my BF baby so hungry all the time?

[FruitynNutty]

I'm almost at the end of my tether now. I gave up BFing DS1 by 5 weeks because he was so hungry.
I was determined to stick with it this time around as I've been feeling like a complete failure ever since (DS1 now 3.5 yrs old)

DS2 is now 3 weeks old and is permanently attached to me with the exception of when we're out and he sleeps in his pram.

Most days he will feed for 7-8 hours solid with the occasional 5 minutes break where I have to leave him screaming just so I can have a shower/get something to eat/go to loo/give attention to DS.

I've started to give him an eve bottle of formula (3/4 oz) and you wouldn't believe the difference. Even after 7/8 hours of feeding he will guzzle a bottle like he's never eaten before. He even sleeps for a good 4-6 hours after. My poor boobs are throbbing after all the feeding

Latch is very good, I'm eating/drinking enough, positioning is very good. However, he seems to feed well out of my left breast but pulls and tugs my right one out of frustration (which is bloody painful!) I've tried expressing out of one breast while feeding from the other but there's no point as I can barely get a dribble out.

He weighed 8lb 5oz at birth then went down to 7lb 11oz, he then gained an ounce in 2nd week but hasn't gained anything in 3rd.

He poo's and wee's all the time so he must be getting something.

I look forward to the eve bottle all day, desperate for a break

I'm starting to think about giving him more formula in the day just so I can get on with things although I know this will just decrease my milk supply even more.

I'm typing this one handed which is taking me forever!

Hello Fruity, I have no real advice for you, but I'm sure you will get lots soon enough.

Just wanted to offer support and say well done for getting this far!! I know how you feel, my DD was attached to my boobs permenantly during the first few weeks of life, it just felt like it couldn't possibly be right! IME things got much much easier by weeks 6-8 and then again at 12 weeks, hang in there if you can, if not, just remember any breast milk LO's get is better than none and you've given your DC a really good start .

If he's only 3 weeks old his tummy will still be tiny and he won't be able to take much in one go, leading to what feels like continuous feeding. My dd was just the same and the only thing to do is go with it and feed when he needs it which is difficult, I know. And remember that if you give bottles of formula your supply will reduce as your body will think your baby doesn't need a feed at that time.

I found that after 6 weeks things got much, much better. DD fed quicker and could go for 2 or 3 hours between feeds and I got a bit of life back. If you can manage, try to get through the next 3 weeks - take it easy and just accept that your baby needs you.

Thanks for the replies My problem is I'm going back to work as a Childminder on Weds next week (DS2 will be 4 weeks old). (Unfortunately I have no choice as I'm self employed I only get Maternity Allowance which is no where near enough to cover my half of the bills/mortgage)

I'm struggling enough to give DS1 the attention he needs and feed at the same time.
My boobs need a break! They feel like they're going to drop off by the end of the day after all this sucking
No one else I know has had to feed constantly like I am. I know he's only 3 weeks old but this is ridiculous. It really is constant feeding. He's constantly rooting for food. How can 7/8 hours of feeding be normal?
He's never satisfied, unless I give him formula.

You say the latch and positioning are fine - have you had this checked by someone who really knows what they are talking about? It may be that tweaking this a bit might improve the efficiency of feeds. You're not using nipple shields are you?

It may just be normal for your baby (who is still very young after all) and it may well be that it settles down in time, but personally I would think about speaking to a breastfeeding counsellor to get the latch checked.

Fruity the problem you have now though, is that because you have introduced formula your body is getting mixed messages. It thinks it is making enough milk when infact it isn't.

DS fed for hours when he was tiny, like KingRolo I remember things getting a lot better at 6 weeks. Is there no way that your husband/partner can cover your part of the bills for a few weeks longer so that you can get feeding fully established?

Latch and positioning was checked by midwives and health visitor - I know not completely reliable but I figure they've seen quite a lot of breast feeding mums so must know something!

I have a friend who is a BFing counsellor and she just got back from holiday this morning so she is going to pop round later

I know the formula thing isn't making matters any better but it really is only one in the evening (so far!) to keep me sane. Bfing hasn't got any worse or better so I'm not sure how much of a difference it's making to my supply.

Unfortunately there's no way DP can pay anymore towards the bills, we're both stretched to the limit as it is so I have to return to work.

A CM friend of mine went back to work after two weeks! and she expressed bottle fulls of milk and managed to feed her DD in about 20 minutes - I saw it for myself!
Maybe she was just lucky.

I could've written your exact post FruitynNutty. I used to read BF manuals and guidance which said things like baby would feed every couple of hours or so and would appear "drunk" on milk after a feed and think "WTF?"

DS1 was either feeding or rooting for a feed in the early weeks and never appeared happy although he wasn't a cry-ey baby, he just seemed permanently hungry.

I went down the top up route which i regretted later on as it took me months to get rid of the bottles. But it all settled down eventually DS1 is 10 months now, still bf and I am glad I persevered as I love bf now.

Could it be that some of the time that he wants feeding he actually just wants to be close to you or perhaps sleep? Infants can associate both comfort and sleep with the breast and demand to be there all day long. I would recommend a good sling, preferably a wrap sling that will keep him close to you while letting you get on with what you need to do as well.

The formula in the evening will send mixed messages as said above, and also it is much harder for your baby to digest which is probably one reason why he seems so full up afterwards. It's also not uncommon for babies to guzzle down a bottle even if they are already full up so it might not mean that he's hungry.

I hope things get a bit easier for you and that you get some good help.

I've just had my BFing counsellor friend round. She made me lunch and took DS1 out with her DS She said the latch and positioning looks good so I've just got to persevere.

My neighbour suggested feeding him for 30-45 mins then topping up with a small amount of formula (30 mls) as she did this with her baby and it worked well. I'm not sure if that's a good idea or not?

Tryharder Yes a lot of mums I know fed their babies every couple of hours and their babies looked drunk after. Certainly not the case with my greedy gannet of a baby
People say to me "How often is he feeding? Every 2/3 hours?"
Eh? I'm lucky if I get 5 mins between feeds!
Which then poses the question: If I'm supposed to change sides at each feed, (rather than changing sides during the same feed) when do I change sides? as it seems like it's the same feed the whole time!

Hi Fruity

Not much to advise but I have been through a bit of this. DD2 has been feeding a lot and we had one week where she only put on 2 oz. The good news is dd2 seems to have been better this week I think (I think I am a week ahead of you).

Why don't you come over to the march post-natal thread. A lot of people have been/gone through similar and have found various ways of dealing with it.

Hi Wheely

That's good news that dd seems to be getting better, I hope ds does the same!

I would love to go to the post-natal group but found the ante-natal impossible to keep up with, there are far too many people in there! I think most of my posts got lost in amongst everyone else's so I kind of gave up

How's dd2 getting on? I'm really looking forward to getting some kind of response from ds, a smile would be nice! I seem to remember they start smiling at around four weeks?

the postnatal thread is a bit slower, and less people on it as people are a bit busier I thinK !

DD2 is fine - beginning to sleep a bit longer some nights so beginning to feel a bit more human. I think we are getting smiles/ recognition from dd2 which is lovely.

hey fruity

i remember this well!! i had pretty much constant feeding with DD at the beginning and i know the hell and exhaustion well
i found that by swapping sides once an hour or so (on the marathon feeds) the next session was shorter as my body slowly began to up my supply. the most likely reason for the long feeds is he is trying to raise the supply. i know it is frustrating but the only thing i can advise is to persevere with it as it WILL get better (i would also invest in a few different shaped dummies (dont flame me!!) as they helped keep me sane in between feeds and can be a big comfort to the LO while he is rooting i mean if he is hungry he would spit out the dummy but if he wants comfort he will suck it) i hope it gets better soon
xx ei xx

Thanks Ei I have a dummy btw but he's not all that keen.

Feeding just now and got friends arriving in 45 mins, not dressed, gotta dry my hair (actually managed to have a shower while DS2 cried ), got a load of washing up to do, DP asleep on sofa after being out all night last night [fuming actually] DS destroying the place with paints and playdough, aaagggghhhhh!!!!
I just wish I could put baby down (happy) for 20 minutes so I an get sorted!

you need to kick DP and get him to do all the sorting!!
i just wish i lived closer and i would lend a helping hand xx
xx ei xx

I know you would Ei

How important is it to feed every 3 hours to keep milk flow up?

It's just that, much that I complain that DS2 feeds constantly, he actually seems to be having very long naps in the afternoon - 4 hours sometimes! It's usually when we go out, he falls asleep straight away. Also he sleeps well for most of the night

The exhausting 7/8 hour feeding marathons are normally from when he wakes from his afternoon nap till bedtime then he guzzles 4-5 oz (was 3oz)

Typical day at the moment is:

4/5am until I go out at around 11ish - constant feeding
11ish to 3ish - nap
3pm - 10pm ish - constant feeding with maybe a 10 min power nap in between
10pm - 4/5oz formula
10:30 - 4/5am - sleep (6 hours!)

I'm lucky he sleeps for long periods but if I was to wake him every 3 hours for a feed would it end my marathon feed sessions?

Also would it be better to feed every 3 hours to get my milk going?
I just can't bare to wake him especially at night as it means I get a good 5/6 hours sleep! But I will try anything to stop the marathon feeds.

Just got my new wrap sling (Moby) in the post and it's FAB! I'm feeding right now and typing with two hands! hurrah!

fruity its not important at this stage to feed at regular intervals ie every 3 hours its more like feeding on demand. your LO is most likely getting everything he needs and comfort sucking for some of the time aswell especially seeing as how he sleeps for long periods after a feed i think you are doing a fantastic job and things will settle down soon
xx ei xx

fruity - sounds a very similar pattern to dd2. She's generally feeding constantly when awake but will have one big sleep in the middle of the day (often coincides with going out too) and is sleeping ok at night.

My HV had told me to ensure I fed every 3 hours when dd wasn't putting on much weight. As she was feeding much more frequently than that most of the time I decided not to wake her at night and the week after she had put on enough weight.

Thank god I'm not the only one Wheely!

I was just a bit worried that if I didn't feed him every 3 hours my milk would never pick up properly. I BF him until around 10pm then nothing from me until around 4/5am so that's 6/7 hours of no stimulation. I just feel like my milk is never going to really get going.
I'm especially worried about my right boob.
Can you have one faulty boob? If I squeeze the left one there is usually two or even three sprays of milk at one time iyswim? Like there are three tiny holes. If I squeeze the right one, I can barely get one spray out and it never ever feels full, even by 5am.
I really try to feed as much as possible out of the "faulty" boob to get it going but no improvement. Baby really tugs and pulls at my nipple like he's desperately trying to get milk out, even whimpers like he's frustrated. But, from what people say on here, you always have enough milk - surely not everyone does?

Fruity,

How are you getting on? The wrap sling sounds great - I am definitely going to invest in one if I ever have another baby.

It's nice to read your posts as you are going through exactly what I went through. I think it's normal for one boob to be a bit more productive than the other - mine certainly are and my DS2 used to whimper in frustration when he felt the milk wasnt coming in quickly enough!

Also, I genuinely believe that some women are brilliant milk producers, gush/leak milk everywhere and they have no trouble at all feeding their babies. And there are those of us that "struggle" a bit more with supply, have slower letdowns and whose babies need feeding more often. That doesn't mean you dont have enough milk because you do.

Honestly, stick with it. My one regret with DS2 is that I lost confidence when I hit a rough spot similar to yours and introduced top ups. Believe me, they just added to the hassle and stress in the long run. At that point, I hadnt discovered mumsnet - I wish I had because all I needed was a bit of confidence and a kick up the arse to get me through the bad days.

My bf mantra is "short term pain for long term gain" - repeat it to yourself through gritted teeth!! In a few months time when others are carrying rucksacks of paraphanalia around with them - flasks/bottles/powder etc, you'll be able to leave the house with a spare nappy in your handbag (believe me, I do this) and feed your lo everywhere and anywhere. Plus more importantly, there is the immense satisfaction and go on, I admit it - smugness - of knowing that you are giving your baby the absolute best nutrition available.

Thank you so much tryharder, lovely words of wisdom
It's just what I need. DP keeps getting frustrated with me and keeps suggesting giving baby a bottle. My own mother, who BF both my sister and I successfully for a long time, keeps saying "Are you sure he's getting enough?" and looks at him with a concerned expression. I just feel like I'm getting no support from the people I would expect it from which makes it so much harder.

The sling is great but I can't always get the positioning of the baby right. He gets a bit suffocated when on my left boob so I have to use my other hand to keep it away from his nose which defeats the point of "hands free feeding" but if he's on the right side it's great. I even did a huge amount of washing up last night, got to put DS1 to bed without leaving baby screaming and tidied up! I think it could change my life!

s tick with it because bf is so much easier for you. be sure its food he wants and not sleep. it took me 4 babies to get this right and i definitely overfed my ds1. with dd4 i worked out that if she'd fed well then when she started crying she needed to be put down- and i mean down. so flat on her front in a carrycot she went and gradually she learnt to get to sleep and she's slept loads in the day and night ever since and is the happiest bunny of my 4 because she's so well rested and eats properly at feedtime because she's not been snacking constantly. she still cries occasionally when i put her down but i have faith in knowing when she's tired now (usually just because she's been awake a while!) and she always goes off to sleep and i never get her up until after she's had a proper sleep. it's not instant but just push the carrycot back and forth, and remind yourself you are teaching him how to sleep (even though he's tiny) and he'll love you forever for that skill.

He's definitely always hungry rather than tired as he is always rooting around. If I put him in his bed when he's not ready he will scream blue murder! We live in a small flat so I can't ignore it, if I could I would!
I did this with DS1 (we lived in my Mother's large house back then) and he has always been a good sleeper.

Gaaaawd Fruity, why didn't you shout at me? Have been too wrapped up in morning sickness to help, I'm so sorry.
Have you had his latch checked on the "bad" boob? Just because he's good on one side, doesn't mean he is on the other. Would you like to go and see my friend?