bad advice on bf (from people who should know better)

[jenz]

i was advised by two different health workers(a nurse in hospital and my health visitor) to give my ds a bottle .it was only because a nurse trained in breastfeeding told me not to,that i didnt give him one to help him along.

during his third week ds didnt gain any weight(although he was feeding correcty-he wasnt a very big baby(6.7) so it was a worry)and my health visitor tried to make me give him a bottle,i objected to this on the grounds that i have a cows milk intolerance and also a soya one and this is what formula milks are based on.i know that you dont simply inherit allergies but im sure it means he would be more likely to have them if i do. (it was only a complimentary bottle but these points made it a big issue for me)

i said to the hv that i would agree with her and give him a bottle if he hadnt gained weight by the next week.i had to have him weighed everyday.he gained weight constantly through the week and has done so ever since,and hes never had a bottle-i breastfeed him solely until he started weaning at 22 weeks.i feel the hv still dislikes me for overriding her authority(even though i had genuine reasons for doing so)the only reason he hadnt gained weight was because i hadnt realised how much he needed to feed-(sometimes all day)-the last think i needed was discouragement as it hurt like hell-but the hvs attitude made me more determined to continue.

she also gave me some pretty bad advice-the usual cliches that i didnt have enough milk-my nipples werent big enough-she told me not to wake him for an extra feed which was wrong-she told me giving a bottle would not decrease my milk production-wrong.i asked her if using a breast pump to stimulate my milk supply was a good idea again she said no -wrong again.i wrang the la leche league and the nct(in a total state of panic) and spoke to a wonderful bf counsellors who gave me loads of support and told me to ignore her advice- im so glad i did-i am still bf 7 months on.

i dont think some health workers read the info they hand out to patients. sometimes you cant trust the opinions of some of these people-even though they are being paid to do a job it doesnt mean they are knowledgable about it,sometimes we do actually know better than them.so trust your own instincts and if anyone says go on give him a bottle-tell them thanks for the advice,but you know what is best for your baby!

jenz, good on you!

I have a similar tale only I didn't stand my ground as you did. DS1 was jaudiced in hospital and I was getting all the usual conflicting advice about b/feeding, I was exhausted and sore, one of the midwifes was concerned that he was dehydrated (urates in nappy but no other signs) and wanted to give him water which I allowed her to do and apparently he drank quite a bit. Another time an older midwife on night-shift (not a b/feeding supporter, I overheard her saying to one of the bottlefeeding mums that she can't be doing with all this breast is best nonsence and midwives didn't have the time to spend sitting with b/feeding mothers) badgered me about him being dehydrated and the weight he was losing, she wanted to give him formula, I gave in (I was shattered, middle of the night) but asked if she could give it in a cup rather than bottle, I got a dirty look for this.

When I got home b/feeding still wasn't going well and at five weeks when DS1 still hadn't regained his birthweight despite being permanently attached (albeit incorrectly I now realise) my HV suggested I give him a bottle once a day, saying that she did the same with her children and not to beat myself up about it. She then later recommended that I switch to the milk for hungrier babies (2nd stage) for the one bottle and suddenly it seemed DS1 preferred the bottle to me, I think my milk supply just couldn't keep up anymore. B/feeding ended at 16 weeks, although I mixed fed from five weeks b/feeding took a sharp downturn at about 12 weeks, this was not the plan, I had hoped to phase out the bottle my HV had advised and continue to about 9 months.

On the otherhand this time round during pregnancy I saw a photograph of a woman b/feeding from a slightly different angle than I have ever done before and it all made sense, I was holding DS1 wrong the lot. I am still b/feeding DS2, 10 months, he was exclusively fed for 17 weeks before introducing solids and I have to say I am very proud of myself as he has had nothing other than breastmilk or water to drink (not that he drinks much water but that's another thread). The only problem I have had this time round was a bout of mastitis due to a stupid front fastening bra I had that I hadn't opened correctly, then a cracked nipple resulting from the mastitis.

Anyway sorry for the ramling, just wanted you to know that you are right, you should trust your own instincts and stand up for yourself, don't let them talk you into giving a bottle but also be aware of the support that is available (which I wasn't first time round I thought the world of b/feeding support ended at midwives and HVs) and pick up the phone and speak of a b/feeding counsellor.

BTW sorry to anyone reading this who has read my rambling tale before!

Definitely agree. I had trouble breastfeeding at first in hospital. DS wouldn't latch on at all (despite half a dozen midwives trying to show me how to do it) but seemed very content anyway. But the midwives insisted that I gave him formula - I really didn't want to, but they said I couldn't take him home until they'd seen him feed successfully, so eventually I gave in (in tears). Once I got home I perservered with the b/feeding, and after a couple of days he'd got the idea.

But when I tried to reintroduce formula at 6 months he had a violent allergic reaction (and the same with goat's milk formula). I often wonder whether this wouldn't have happened if he hadn't had those few bottles at such a young age.

sad to hear about such awful attitudes people have come across. My baby got bottles at night for the first few nights while I recovered from a c section. I'd asked for him to be brought to me when hungry but was no way up to staggering up the 3 flights to the baby unit. At the time I was really upset about it but it didn't seem to have any longer term effects. I do remember though watching him being given one bottle after I'd struggled to feed him for what seemed like hours while he screamed and a midwife clucked over me to give him a bottle. I gave in and was sooooo upset to see him just wolf it down in what seemed like seconds. I couldn't wait to get home and discharged myself early and from then on it got easier and easier. No midwife standing over me!
This week I went to the docs for antibiotics. She had a 5 month old she was breastfeeding. i asked whether I needed antibiotics at all cos I was breastfeeding and she took this to mean I was refusing her treatment and gave me a hard time and then said I would have to take these pills and stop breastfeeding immediately because they pass into the milk(just standard penicillin BTW). we had a 'polite' disagreement and I ended up with a mouth spray that cured my sore throat almost immediately, and din't stop breastfeeding. I mean, I'm no expert but surely it's really bad for the mother to 'just stop cold turkey' like that (no mention of pump and dump)and unnecessary anyway?

I had a bad experience in hospital with dd (1st baby). On my 2nd night (she had been born in the evening on Sunday, this was Monday about midnight) the midwife on duty bustled in (having been standing ouside my room watching - must have been -how else would she have known I was up and feeding) and tried to PULL dd of my breast and take her to give her a bottle! I was 'wearing myself out' trying to b/f her! I had had a nasty 37hr labour with a ventouse, but I was determined to breastfeed, and here was this midwife trying to tell me not to!
Then, when I got home, my HV told me that I would 'never' feed such a big baby (dd was 9lb12) and to start giving her a bottle at teatime. Luckily I never listened to her! I didn't see her again after that (told her I would manage on my own!!) and just got on with it. I ended up complaining to the hospital about the attitude I encountered - when I was being discharged they insisted on me being shown how to make up a bottle but not how to express milk!!! I fed dd for 13 months and ds for 14 - but only because I knew enough to be determined about it with all the bad advice I was given.
That being said, both times I was given some really good support by midwives who were prepared to sit up, all night if need be, with me while I got my head round feeding.
My GP was the same. I was put on the 'old' sort of antidepressants which made me too sleepy all day and night to look after dd properly. In order to find out if I could be on the newer antidepressants and still breastfeed I had to do the research myself - I was very disappointed at this sttitude - not helping out when I was very sick with PND and b/f was the only thing I was doing well, yet they all wanted me to stop.
Jenz is right - there are a lot of HP's out there who know nothing about bf and are not prepared to educate themselves!