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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

AT MY WITS END TRYING TO GET 7 MONTH OLD TO TAKE BOTTLE - HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING

34 replies

NoseyHelen · 31/03/2009 20:11

Title says it all. I am at my wits end. I've been trying since DS was 10 days old to get him to take a bottle.

We have tried him on EBM, formula, warm, warm, cold, Tommee Tippee Closer to Nature bottle, MAM bottle, spouted cup, MAM soft spout, Doidy Cup, spoon. My husband over 7 months has got him to take 3oz in total. I have never suceeded in getting anything down him. We have left him with the bottle to play with on his own (watching from a distance) when full of milk, water, nothing.

Having got him to sleep through from 12 weeks he now wakes up at night for ages which I think is because he is hungry having missed his afternoon feed because I'm refusing to breast feed him when a bottle/cup is on offer.

He currently has 7am BF, breakfast, 11am BF, lunch, (3pm bottle that is declined,) dinner and then bedtime BF.

I spoke to HV today - she said reinstate afternoon feed but let him play with empty cups and then at some point put water in them. I feel that this is a backwards step and us just trying yet another techmique that is going to fail. I want DS to have milk feeds, not water, and if it fails he will dehydrate over the summer.

OP posts:
giantkatestacks · 31/03/2009 20:23

Are you going back to work soon then - otherwise why would you want to go through all this?

I had this with my ds shortly before nursery - it only fell into place literally in the week that he was going - we had to go back to a newborn fastflow type teat as he wasnt happy with any sort of work and was used to a fast letdown.

With my dd we have just started on a tommy tippee cup - we did water first with meals and then midafternoon (cold) cows milk feed as I will be going back to work 2 days in April. I think its easier to start with water and then move to milk - and do it at times when hes not hungry otherwise hes just going to get frustrated and cross.

sorry its all such a pain.

MuddlingThru · 31/03/2009 20:26

Any particular reason you need your ds to take a bottle? My ds2 is exactly the same but I figure in a couple more months if on occasion I want leave him with someone for the mid morning or mid afternoon feed he can have a drink from a beaker (which he is happy to drink from at mealtimes) and a small snack.

ConnorTraceptive · 31/03/2009 20:30

I was in EXACTLY the same position when ds2 was 7 months. I honestly never though he would take it. The best piece of advise I was given was to just lie him on the floor give him bottle of milk and then leave it at that (not when he's really hungry mind you)
Just chill and walk away. I was at first but you know what after battling for months and having spent a small fortune on all types of bottles, cup and beakers the little beggar just took it.

I understand how you are feeling right now I never thought it was going to happen

FannyJoBanana · 31/03/2009 20:32

Why not try food at that time instead?
My DD wouldn't take a bottle and started to drink from a tommy tippee with food - only water. Only started giving milk once not bf in the day.

allieatischocolate · 31/03/2009 21:06

I know how you feel!
Gave my baby bottles very early on as I was not really up for bf but thought i'd give it a go if I could do both. At 6 weeks she refused to take a bottle and hasn't taken one since.... Now at 7 months she is not at all keen on solids and weaning has not been going well- I still have to feed her 6 times a day, with 2 of those feeds being about 1hr long! I'm desparate to stop feeding her but don't know how!

I know this isn't a very helpful reply- but it did make me feel better that someone is in the same position as me

popsycal · 31/03/2009 21:09

MAM teat
warm EBM
teat and bottle just out of sterilisrer but safe temp tp use
sit baby in baby chair

Original poster
NoseyHelen · 31/03/2009 22:58

Why do I want to give him a bottle - because I would like at some point to be able to go out on my own for say half a day - call me selfish if you like. I've spent 37 of the last 40 months pregnant or breastfeeding and I want my body back.

I don't want to give him food instead of milk because he needs to drink at some point during the day. I might just leave him with a bottle but I know he'll drop it and then that will be that. The experiment will last all of 5 seconds.

I can't tell you how frustrated I am about this. I wish someone could say 'Do x and your son will be bottle-feeding in 3 days time'.

OP posts:
giantkatestacks · 31/03/2009 23:04

It will change when he starts eating more - honestly it will - you will get much more relaxed about it all then

I can happily go out for half the day- or all the day really knowing that if my dd wont take milk out of a cup then she can have a yoghurt and just feed when I get back instead.

KingRoloEgg · 31/03/2009 23:11

Mine is a bit younger than yours but we have pretty much given up on a bottle after weeks and weeks of failed attempts. We're persisting with the doidy cup now and it seems (fingers crossed) to be working. It's messy and a bit if a pita to do but it seems to be the best way of getting some ebm milk down her.

It's a bit galling to go through this after working so hard on making bfing work isn't it?

ready4anothercoffee · 31/03/2009 23:15

I agree with gks, give him time, plus once he's eating a bit more. I've only just got dd2(13mths) to accept anything other than the breast. if it helps, she like the tommee tippee bottle to cup trainer bottle which has a silicone spout instead of a teat, and the tommee tippee easy flo beaker.

Also agree, take the pressure off the afternoon bottle, offer, if declined, offer a litle cheese and rice cake or similar to keep him going. you might find once the pressure has gone he's more relaxed about trying it.

plusonemore · 01/04/2009 07:34

i got ds2 to take a bottle by tricking him with my breasts!! He was a couple of months younger than your dc though. I did it at the 6.30 feed, first time gave him most of a feed, took him off breast then popped bottle in, he didnt notice. Gradually reduced how much BF he was having before substituting with bottle untill just showed him my breast and popped bottle in. Now he not only takes bottle but grabs with 2 hands! Oh, and I'm sure you're sick of buying new bottles, but I use NUK ones, you could just buy the teats? They are meant to be close to BF as the hole is on the top not the end. Good luck

plusonemore · 01/04/2009 07:35

oh, and he likes it really warm, like a drinkable cup of tea

plusonemore · 01/04/2009 07:35

i meant to say 6.30 pm feed, so he was a bit sleepy, didnt see the bottle coming!!

shootfromthehip · 01/04/2009 08:08

I had this problem with both of my DC. After terrible experiences with DC1, I made sure that DS took a bottle for his late feed from 3 days old. Unfortunately he went in to hospital at 8 weeks old and from that point refused a bottle. I left it until he was 6 months and used an old fashioned NUK bottle and he just took it one bedtime when he was washed, warm and cosy.

On the other hand, my DD never took a bottle, ever. We tried for months and months and got nowhere except stressed out of our/ my head. I was so determined to stop feeding her that at 4 mths old I fed her at 7 am and left the house leaving her with my Mum. She refused the bottle for the whole day until caving in hysterical at 6pm that night (after falling asleep, she took it in her sleep- who said they won't starve themselves). She never took another one. We accepted that she was never going to be a big milk drinker and made sure that she got plenty of yoghurt/ cheese/ butter and she drank water and the odd ounce of formula from a beaker. We made sure that all her food was mixed with milk powder/ formula (on the advise of the HV). She put weight on slowly but was also a terrible BFer and is still a fussy eater.

So the moral of this story would be that you can back off for a week or so and try again (maybe after a sleep- wake him up and stick a bottle in and hope for the best), or give up on the whole bottle thing and accept that your baby will have to get his nutrition from food

Sorry to not be more positive but I tried EVERYTHING with DD and got nowhere. I too spent a fortune, expressed and disregarded pints of breastmilk and argued with DH about the lack of support that he gave me (he was of the give in and feed her school of thought). You feel trapped when you can't leave them and it's the most horrible feeling in the world. I do feel for you and wish you the best. It will be over sooner rather than later one way or the other so try and stay positive

Good luck (and I found that me giving the bottle to DS was the only way to do it rather than someone else ).

SJisontheway · 01/04/2009 08:39

DD1 never took a bottle. I tried them all! I know how you feel. She eventually took an avent magic cup with the valve taken out so basically I was just pouring small amounts in her mouth. She tolerated it very well and before long was able to take large amounts this way. When she got a bit older I was able to put the valve back in and she could suck away and feed herself.

popsycal · 01/04/2009 10:20

Noseyhlene
i kmnow where wyou sre comingfrom - i have spent the last58 months pregnant or breast feeding [pshock]

popsycal · 01/04/2009 10:21

rubbish typing sorry but yes 58 months

CantSleepWontSleep · 01/04/2009 11:52

46 months here .

At the moment you are not bf'ing him between 11am and bedtime anyway, so what's the problem if you want a one off half day out? Just have one, and bf him on the afternoons that you are with him.

CMOTdibbler · 01/04/2009 11:59

Have you tried a cup and straw ? Sounds weird, but seems to appeal to babies. At first, dip the straw into the water, put your finger over the end, and then dribble into their mouth. Do lots of demonstrating, and they get the hang in a couple of days. Present the cup at each meal, and just leave it on his highchair tray

Gorionine · 01/04/2009 12:01

8years Bfeeding here and DD$ shows no sign of wanting to stop . but that is besside the point. DD! never could drink froma bottle. Try this it is soft like a teat but is shapes like a beaker. It might do the trick ?

sundew · 01/04/2009 12:03

I've got the same story as shootfromthehip - I tried everything with dd1 and she never ever took a bottle - not even at the childminders. She also wouldn't drink milk from beakers (although she would drink water).

We gave her plenty of yogurt / milk on her cereal / cheese and she has grown up fine - now a VERY active 8 year old (who still doesn't like milk!)

Don't worry they don't starve themselves.

Original poster
NoseyHelen · 06/04/2009 10:11

Thanks for the support everyone. I'm going to leave it for a while because it was stressing me out. He has a selection of cups to play with and if one becomes a favourite I'll try it with some water in a few weeks.

OP posts:
Hayesey · 06/04/2009 23:17

Going through exactly the same thing and have had an awful day where milk has covered him, me and the kitchen floor having tried every bottle and cup we have. I had managed to get him taking 2 bottles a day (with plenty of tears - mine mainly - along the way) and he seemed to sense that I was due to be whisked off in a couple of weeks for a day in a spa and suddenly flatly refused. 3 weeks later still no joy. We have had issues on and off throughout and have tried a number of different types of bottles etc. The two things that have done the trick (in the past) are 1) starting the feed while he is asleep and hungry i.e. picking him up 30 mins earlier than usual for his first feed if you can 2) feeding him outside - he has a real thing for the seaside! Good luck and I hope you get some time for yourself soon.

callmeovercautious · 06/04/2009 23:37

Hi Helen - Sorry to say it but I actually agree with your HV (well from my experience).

I bought a Tomme tippee cup at about 4m. DD was EBF but I knew I would need to get her drinking water when we went onto food. I was not thinking milk at the time. She did however take the very occasional bottle of EBM from about 10 days (as in 1x a month when with my mum).

However, she instantly liked playing with the cup. I then put a little water in and would shake it and play with it. I left it lying around for her to see and touch often.

Then when I finally put it on her highchair tray with water in as a "real drink" she just took it and drank. When she started Nursery at 11m she had milk from the cup rather than a bottle, much easier than trying to go from Breat to bottle then cup.

Hope that helps.

NormaJeanBaker · 07/04/2009 00:41

No good tips but sorry for the struggle. I could never get DD1 to take a breast or a bottle so poured milk down her throat for 4 months. Then she latched onto the bottle. Why does anyone write baby guides for the parents? What a waste of paper.