Can any tandem feeders advise?

[Rosebud05]

I'm currently 30 weeks pregnant and bfing my dd who has just turned 2. I think that I'm planning to continue until she self-weans, though only feeding before bedtime in the evening. I've just been pondering what will happen with dc2 arrives and there's colostrum instead of milk for a couple of days. Obviously, this is meant for a newborn, so how on earth do I explain that to dd?
Thanks in advance and sorry if there's a really obvious answer and I'm just being dim.

hello!
you may be surprised to hear this, but dd has probably been drinking colostrum for some time now! sometime during your pregnancy, your breasts stop producing milk and start producing colostrum (they soemtimes stop producing anything for a short while, and some children give up at this point, but not all). almost certainly this has already happened.
your breasts will adjust and your dd will adjust. she mght not like the taste (although she is perhaps used to it already) but as long as you always feed the newborn first there should not be a problem.

Aaah, that's useful to know. So would we just carry on as usual (depending on hopsital stay etc)?

yes just carry on as usual
you might find that having a toddler around really helps relieve the pressure when the milk comes in
congratulations and well done by the way.
tandem feeding was one of the best experiences of my life. I am very sorry it is finished
imo it really helped my dds bond

Just go with the flow, so to speak!! You start to produce colostrum from around 28 weeks, so she's probably already getting it. My DD1 was very pleased to be getting "a proper drink" when my colostrum arrived. She may want to nurse more frequently when the baby arrives, I let DD1 nurse as often as she wanted for the first week or so then began distracting her etc until she was back to first thing in the morning, nap time and evening/bedtime. I'm sure it stopped the big jolt of jealousy and smoothed the transition from only child to older sister for her. I had DD2 at home too, so DD1 went to bed as normal one night and came through the next morning to find her baby sister had arrived whilst she'd been asleep!

Good luck, and take pictures!! I regret not having a photo of me nursing DD1 whilst I was heavily pregnant, but I do have a beautiful picture of my girls nursing together for the first time when DD2 was only about 7 hours old. Not one I'd show everyone (way too much boob/belly on show!) but well worth having to look back on!

dd is 5 weeks now and ds2 has been a godsend with engorgment . Colostrum didn't bother him at all.

hello, another tandem feeder here!

I agree with Harpsi and all the others - you are probably producing colostrum rather than milk already.

Just make sure that in the first few days your baby gets to suck as much as they want and limit the times your other child is on to when the baby is asleep.

DS1 didn't even notice the change but he did notice the milk coming in and was very pleased and a bit surprised although I had explained that the new baby would be bringing lots of milk with him/her.

Good luck, it's actually been much smoother than I had thought and a real godsend getting them to both nap at the same time, I think I am getting far more sleep than most of my friends with newborns and toddlers.

or, thinking about it, maybe don't limit it to when the baby is asleep - that worked for us because DS2 always fell asleep after nursing so I could put DS1 on straight after DS2 had had a go - but if your new baby has a different pattern then you might find a different solution.

Whatever, I am sure you will find your own way around it, it's really not as complicated as I had feared (or as non-nursers tend to assume).

I found that nursing them together helped with the "how do I entertain my toddler whilst the new baby nurses non-stop" dilema. After the first week I began to suggest different activities like book reading etc rather than letting DD1 nurse every time DD2 was, so I didn't start limiting DD1's time until things were starting to settle down.

My toddler DD nursed throughout my pregnancy and was invaluable when my milk came in again, I use to wake her up in the morning to nurse to ease my engourgement

I choose not to limit my toddler at the breast and it did take a couple of months for my breasts to adjust to two nurselings during the day and one at night, for a couple of months I would wake up with full to bursting breasts.

YMMV but my DD had gone down to one nurse a day in my middle trimester but wanted nursing every time the baby nursed. Up to you if you want to do this or not of course.

My toddler stopped eating solids and went back to full time milk for the first couple of weeks. It didn't really bother me, nursing a newborn who's latch is not quite right yet was uncomfortable, in comparison it was lovely to have an easy to nurse toddler who is on and off in minutes

DD never commented on milk being less or changed but she did comment on the milk coming in and she was so happy to get full milk feeds again

My DD and DS are very loving towards each other and I really think Tandem nursing really helps their relationship to be close.

I agree about the sibling rivalry - DS1 is extremely loving and calm with DS2, I think out of all the siblings I know, he is the one who has taken to becoming an older brother the most easily.

He is naturally a sweet, caring little boy anyway but I am sure the nursing helped as he's never felt pushed out of our relationship.

But, in contrast to BE, I found it more uncomfortable to nurse my toddler after his brother arrived. The newborn latch felt so soft and "right" and in comparison a mouthful of teeth and a suck like a hoover felt weird! I don't enjoy feeding my eldest as much any more and have had to make a conscious decision to continue. I've since read some literature saying that both reactions are common and normal - but I wanted to say if you do feel like this it's apparently quite common.

Thanks, ladies. Although I know a few 'extended bfers' in RL, I dont' know anyone who has tandem fed, so it's reassuring to know that not everyone thinks I'm a complete loon.
Though if dd's already getting colostrum, why is she so bloody snotty all the time?!?