Nightfeeds and sleeping: any top tips?

[KiwiPanda]

I seem to have developed a real problem going to sleep between nightfeeds. DD (12 weeks) still feeds roughly every 3 hours at night and many nights I just lie there in between, while she sleeps soundly, counting down the time until I know she's going to wake up again. Am utterly exhusted but just can't go to sleep. Does anyone else find this and have any top relaxation techniques to recommend?

I seem to remember reaading that BF releases a hormone that makes it easier to go back to sleep... well not for me it doesn't

Actually one other question too - I still swaddle DD and at this rate will be doing it until she's 18 (well, at least I'd know she couldn't sneak out at night during those teenage years ). When did other mumsnetters stop swaddling and was it a tricky transition?

Oh poor you. My dd, 16 wks is pretty much the same, feeding 3hrly overnight but I do manage to get back to sleep in a nano second. I remind myself that I'ii probably have a good 3 hours sleep before the next feed which seems like ages. Or if I'm very tired DD comes in to bed with me for most feeds overnight, I just lie on my side so she feeds and I stay nice and sleepy.
Re swaddling: I stopped swaddling dd at about 8 wks cause thats what I thought you should so but apparently people swaddle for alot longer. So I swaddle again for day time naps. I can pat her to sleep then without her arms getting in the way! I leave her in sleeping bag overnight as she feeds to sleep.

Not many tips I'm afraid, I just wanted to offer support as I was just the same with DD2 and am kind of dreading the early days with DC3 (due shortly) as I fear this will happen again. DD2 was a great sleeper and even in the early few weeks would only wake maybe once or max twice in the night - and yet I was more wiped out that friends with regularly waking babies as once DD2 woke and I fed her e.g. at 2am, that was it for me, I'd generally fall into a fitful sleep about half an hour before she woke up again at 7am!!

So what helped a bit..... breathing exercises (slowly counting in and out while breathing and trying to concentrate fully on each breath), a relaxation tecnique where I started by concentrating on my toes and tried to feel them going heavy and relaxed then slowly moved up my legs and the rest of my body trying to feel each part of it go heavy and sink into the bed (if that makes sense!). Ear plugs (provided DH was there and would give me a kick when DD2 woke up for the next BF) it wasn't that there was any real noise in my bedroom, it's just sometimes with earplugs in when all you can hear is a kind of whooshing white noise of your circulatory system it is quite relaxing I found. Also, concentrating on something random and slightly taxing on brain power (e.g. a silly favourite of mine - if I won £1m on the lottery how would I divide the money between friends / family / spend on house / school fees etc - the more mathematical calculations I could fit in the better as these seemed to keep my brain busy and help me drop off!).

Re swaddling, I stopped at about 8 weeks when I moved DDs into big cot from moses basket and put them into sleeping bags instead.

Thanks NellytheElephant (though not for the fact that I now have that song going round my head!) - I will try those top tips tonight!

That is rough - there is nothing more frustrating than being knackered and awake when NOT being kept up by a baby (and I speak as a currently insomniac pregnant mother of a 2.8mth co-sleeping toddler).

This might be blardy obvious, but are you turning a light on when you bf? I read that even a light as low as 25w (or equivalent, as naturally you'll have low energy light bulbs ) can reset your body clock.

The other thing I find helps is to move the clock so I have to make an effort to see the time. It doesn't directly help me sleep but because I don't know how long I'm lying awake, or can get upset by how little time there is left before the next wake-up, I'm more relaxed and less frustrated. And it's that that helps me drift off to sleep.

Kiwi - I was exactly like that with DS1. Things that help are keeping the lights down low when you are doing the night feeds (I also found lying down feeding so you stay snuggly and sleepy helped). Personally, I found meditation cds helped (you can download them from itunes and then just listen to them on head phones) so you're at least switching off between feeds, and more often than not sleeping. I've now got a 5 week DS2 and finding it so much easier to go back to sleep after feeds.

And as for swaddling, we were still partially swaddling DS1 at 5 months (he was in a .5 tog growbag and swaddled with one arm out in a huge muslin square). We then phased it out by having both arms out then not using swaddle but using muslin to tuck him into his cot. By 7 months he was fully out of it. He was (and still is) very active when awake so dont think swaddling hampered his development at all but it was just something he really loved and took a while to phase out. We're swaddling DS2 - hoping we'll be able to phase the swaddle out abit earlier with him though...

oh huge hugs!! I totally remember that stage.. and the not sleeping... I found a natural remedy that you spray on your tongue (go to health shops and ask) which is safe for breastfeeding, also a bath or something relaxing before bed.... One of my issues I found was some post-partum depression, this seemed to add to my insomnia.. and was no fun, so may be worth talking to your doctor about that.
In regards to the swaddling, if it works well, I would just continue... I saw a great link for a swaddling technique called the uber swaddle... this technique is similar to the miracle blanket (but with your own swaddle/blanket)... try and google uber swaddle?? We ended up getting a Peke Moe sleep sack (you can google that) to transition from the swaddling, and that worked really well for our little boy.
all the best!!!