This latest problem is really depressing me, but I REALLY don't want to give up BF yet

[Hopefully]

I am feeling so totally down about this, and I really don't want it to be the end of BF, but I'm not sure how much longer I can fight on.

DS is nearly 22 weeks, was exclusively BF for 10 weeks, and then had one bottle for one night waking from then on. He slept from 11-7 for 2 weeks at 13 weeks, so didn't have the bottle, and did the same thing about 14 days ago for 4-5 nights.

He has gradually, over the past 2 weeks, become nigh on impossible to feed. This problem started happening at one feed a day, then two, then all but the morning and late night feeds.
He will latch on fine, feed for anything from 20secs to 3 mins and then pull off screaming hysterically. I try to burp him, nothing comes up. If I attempt to abandon the feed at any point he screams hysterically and will not be calmed, so is obviously hungry. I persevere, latching him on alternate sides, where he will continue to suck for 30sec-3mins, then pull off screaming and take ages to calm down before I can latch him on again. If I continue with one side only he gets even more distressed.
Sometimes he really will not continue with the feed after about 10 mins, and once or twice a day he eventually relaxes after about 30 mins screaming and pulling off and feeds 'properly' for a while.

Every feed (except the morning one) is now a good 30-60 minutes of stress and screaming for him, and I am in tears by the end of every feed - it is like I am trying to feed him sulphuric acid.

As I said, he slept through a few times recently, but is now back to waking 3-4 hourly at night, presumably as he isn't taking much during the day. He will happily take the bottle at night, and usually takes a BF, but occasionally gets distressed like he does during the day.

I really am so depressed about this - I know we don't BF exclusively, but I so wanted to continue to at least 6 months, possibly a bit longer if all went well. I didn't realise how important it was to me until it started to go so wrong.

Help!

Strangely my dd is 22 weeks tomorrow and we have exactly the same problem. No idea why she is so unhappy but I tried giving her a bottle of expressed milk this morning and she was exactly the same. Takes a bottle of formula at 11pm with no problems at all. So no advice from me but sympathy!

Hopefully

always me - sorry

It could be that your letdown is not coming fast enough, plus your lo is impatient. Feeding is more a necessity and a bit of a chore when there is so many exciting things to look at so he gets frustrated and therefore is off-on-off-on. Bet it hurts too.

Try feeding without distractions, but more importantly prepare yourself. Relax, have happy thoughts before you latch on. Being stressed before you get started due to having the expectation that it is going to be painful and traumatic actually has the effect of inhibiting supply.

This stage truly is a pita. Baby Starlight with frustration also punches my breasts and pushes them away stretching the skin surrounding the nipple and making it really sore .

You really have done well with the bfing. Don't underestimate your achievements so far. Weaning is just weeks away and the feeds will reduce a little. Hang in there.

inhibiting letdown not supply - sorry.

Thankfully it's not terribly painful for me - he is unlatching and screaming rather than twisting and turning iykwim.

We've been enduring the 'i want to look around while feeding' and the 'oh, i want to do something else, let's stop', but he genuinely seems distressed - it's like i am force feeding him acid.

I am so upset by this, I don't know how much longer I can take of DS being so upset.

I agree with SL again.

This could just be normal distractibility (is that a word?). Have you tried going to the bedroom and just try to feed lying down? Darkening the room a little can help a lot. They do get impatient with the letdown.

Try swapping from one side to the other till the letdown comes from whichever one they happen to be latched on when it does. I have a 'quick roll over' technique with dd2 who is now 20 wks at the moment.

It is possible that overall tiredness also increases this frustration. The waking pattern you describe is not necessarily linked to not getting enough milk during the day. It is all part of a normal waking pattern continuum for breastfed babies.

hope things improve soon.

well my dd2 used to scream because my milk was coming too fast. i found if i lay down whilst feeding her it was a lot better.

what about reflux? does infacol make any tiny difference?

what does his poo look like?

I had something similar - though it was very painful for me too. Turns out he was tongue-tie so couldn't latch on properly - this was spotted when he was 11 weeks (after 3 weeks of agony!) - and even though everyone assured me it didn't normally get worse rather than better, obviously it can...might be worth checking?

what was also very true is that because I was so stressed/tired/miserable about it all my milk went weird and his poo was all green and stringy rather than orange or yellow.

so i started expressing during the day so I could be sure how much he was getting and giving him one formula bottle just before bed - then breastfeeding him in the night. I'm still doing that now (4 weeks later) and though the breastfeeding is still painful he and I are much happier - and last week he slept from 7pm to 5.30am two nights in a row!!!! (hasn't since mind you - but hey, at least i know he can...)

Could it be related to teething? DS spent a couple of weeks pulling off and being irritable during some bf when his first teeth were sprouting, although I don't think he was as distressed as your LO sounds.
I think it's quite common for sleep patterns to be unpredictable at this age and apparently it gets better - we're still living in hope!
Good luck with the feeding and sleeping

Hi all- check mouth for thrush- usual cause of this- also, check your diet- maybe yo are eating something every day- could even be milk- that babe hates. Try and persevere- if they dont want bm in a bottle, not likely to be letdown issue- more likely taste or pain in mouth. Good luck x

It could be thrush?

Also, the green poo thing is sometimes teething because the baby is making so much saliva. Any sign of teeth, or red cheeks at all?

Hopefully, I had same prob when dd was 3 month old, we battled for almost 6 weeks. We treated mouth thrush, and dd has been diagnosed to have silent reflux by the a very good doctor just before X'mas. She is just over 6 month now, is getting better, but I only breastfeed her in the moring and night. She is now on Cow & Gate comfort follow on. I strongly suggest you to check on breastfeeding network for Thrush and take him to see the doctors about reflux. all the best