Breastfeeding etiquette

[laumiere]

Morning all,

Following on from a previous thread (and for my own information) would you cover up/go elsewhere to breastfeed if you were in someone else's house or place of business (such as an office) and they were obviously uncomfortable with BF?

Would you offer to cover up/ go elsewhere yourself or wait for them to ask?

(I'm not giving an age of friend/baby here deliberately, feel free to add one if it is relevant to your examples)

Oh absolutely, Having a baby in need of a feed does not make me particularly condusive to dealing with other people's silly aversions. I persoanlly think that flashing nips in public does no one any favours though, and just makes it harder to win over those who are a bit squeamish.

Yes, agree nipple flashing isn't brilliant, though I had a very very long time when it was a question of IF I could latch DS on, not how discreetly. It would have been a huge barrier to our carrying on if I'd felt that I couldn't go out all that time and luckily for us I was sufficiently wrapped up in my own little world that I didn't let it destroy BFing for me (but had friends for whom it did end BFing and I think that's )

I have to see my nipple to latch him on, so I'd be buggered if I tried to avoid exposing them! I do try not to leave them dangling in the breeze for too long, but I'm not going out of my way.

Thanks everyone who commented, I think I need to be a little less aware of others' reactions if I want BFing to succeed with this LO!

Although if the email I just got from work is anything to go by, may be interviewing for a new job while BFing a newborn!

In the very early days I was anxious to avoid offending people and would say that I was feeding, while making it clear that I was comfortable with them being there, in case people wanted to leave the room. Only DP's brother did and he came in anyway after about 5 minutes. When I visited MIL she kept offering me a bedroom or the conservatory to feed in and I accepted but only because I thought I was embarrassing her or DP's grandparents, who think I am batty for picking DS up when he's not even crying. After 3 months or so I just feed him wherever I happen to be I have only had one comment but just shrugged it off.

Whether I moved or not would depend on how I was asked, but I almost certainly wouldn't offer unless it was having a really extreme effect on someone.

Seeing my friends bf in front of me discreetly changed my views on bfing in public

The only time I have moved is when I was having lunch at my mum's friend's house, in her large conservatory. My mum's friend's niece was also there with her five month old DS (DD was about four weeks I think) and when he wanted a feed she got up from the table and went and sat at the end of the conservatory with him, so when DD wanted a feed a few minutes later I felt like I should move away from the table as well - just would have felt odd getting my baps out when she had moved, though I have no idea whether she moved because of other people or because she'd rather feed on her own out of view.

Is it considered bad manners to feed at the table? I've done it but often wondered whether it is because of the above incident and because of something Libby Purves says in How Not to be a Perfect Mother (I think)?

I always feed at the table in a coffee shop, pub, or at the house of someone I know well - but I don't think I would if it was a more formal affair, or if for example we were at MIL's house who I know feels slightly awkward about the whole thing.

...I don't know actually, thinking about it, I probably would feed at the table if I was out with my DP or friends, but not at say a wedding.

Oh dear - pretty sure I've fed at the table at a wedding (it was the first time I'd really fed in public too). DD has an uncanny ability to know when I'm just about to eat and demand a feed, so I've eaten a lot of meals one-handed with her clamped to a breast!

WastingME, I am the same, but found a large sized muslin tucked into the bra strap meant I could man-handle everything into position without the need to flash anyone.

Well maybe I would feed at a wedding... I think it would definitely depend on whose wedding it was!!

I don't really think these things through - I guess I just go by my instincts at the time.

I didn't feel any bad vibes, so hopefully it was okay! Harder to move really at a formal sit-down dinner