The end of bf [sympathy required please...]

[Hadeda]

My DD is 13 months and I think we are comming to the end of bf.

I am 20 weeks pregnant with no 2 and I know my milk supply has decreased throughout this pregnancy. DD has gone from about 4 feeds a day in October to just once a day now. Yesterday I had just started feeding her when DH called me from downstairs, which distracted her so she popped off and saw her dummy on the bed next to us. She turned round and put the dummy in her mouth. I offered her more milk but she didn't want it. Today she wasn't very interested, had a few sucks but seemed far more interested in leaping around the bed.

I know bf has to come to an end at some point and I had no set period I had to bf for. But I am so sad (to the point of crying while typing this) at what looks like the end of this part of our relationship. And I feel a bit guilty that perhaps I've made this happen by getting pregnant again.
But she's a healthy happy girl who has had the benefit of bf for just over a year so I'm trying to look for positives.

While I'm at it, could I also say thank you to so many of you on MN who helped us get this far. We had slow weight gain issues and were told to top up with formula by HV and GP, which we were able to avoid with support from MN (and a fantastic paediatrician). And reading other threads and other experiences has also helped immensely.

I sympathise! You've done really well to continue bf-ing for so long, esp with another pregnancy! I bawled my eyes out when stopped bf-ing 1st ds and again with 2nd ds esp as I won't be having more children and the thought of never bf-ing again was awful! It's such a wrench! Hopefully you'll have as much joy with it with dc2!

sympathy here too - well done - you have done so well to feed for so long.Good luck with no 2

in exactly the same possition. 15 weeks pg and 12 month old dd still feeding at night and morning. supply is low also

totally agree about mumsnet support. would like to add my thanks too

Thank you for all the messages! Peachface, you're right about it being a wrench. I am just going to concentrate on the fact I made it to a year and she got the benefit at the critical time - i.e. when she was a tiny baby.

Your post made me a bit teary!

Congratulations on the pg

BF to 13m is a great thing... it might just be a little 'strike' (you never know?)

I too felt very emotional and weepy when dd2 stopped bf

But it won't be long before you can enjoy it all over again

We too had slow weight gain and avoided top-ups with the help of MN and are going strong at 9 months.
I hope we can do as well as you have.

You know what's important here is that your DD chose when to wean. Hardly any child in the UK gets to do that - she's a lucky girl.

Well done

Well done on breastfeeding your DD for 13 months.

Lots and lots of sympathy too. My DS is 18 months old and I'm 14 weeks pregnant, and I think we're headed the same way too. He's cut right down his number of feeds and tonight was the first night he's ever gone to sleep without a feed (I just didn't get upstairs quick enough, he just snuggled in to DH at story time and by the time I got upstairs, sound asleep). It is a strange feeling - not helped by the hormones of pregnancy I'm sure.

You're right for focusing on the positives - you've given your DD such a fantastic start in life, and to feed her until she feels that she's happy to wean is great

(ps reading Adventures in Tandem Feeding there are stories of people in similar situations whose LOs fancy feeding again when the new baby arrives - so you never know!!!)

well done you on bf so long and with such obvious enjoyment for you both. End of an era hey, combined with the fact of her not being a baby anymore all of a sudden.

I actively wanted to stop when I did and I still went like 'ooooh my baby!!!!' the first night

so plenty of sympathy from me. And a big pat on the back.

Well done for feeding for so long. I can see this coming for us soon too. Little Ff is nearly 12 months, and is only feeding in the morning and before bed now. Part of me is looking forward to getting my breasts back, but I know it will probably be harder for me than it is for her. I went away last weekend, and Bloke gave her cows milk in a bottle when she would usually have a breastfeed, and said that she didn't complain at all - he even suggested that I use it as the point to call it a day, but I told him absolutely not!

Thank you all. ProvincialLady - your point that she got to choose to stop herself is a very good one, have been thinking about that quite a bit!
I haven't fed her now for 2 days and she hasn't "asked" at all. Boobs feel a little funny - kind of itchy. Presume they're also having to get used to things! Although I guess it's only a matter of weeks before they go back into High Production Mode for no. 2....

Sending you lots of sympathy and wanted to tell you that I just had my second dd, my first dd stopped feeding for about 2 months while i was pregnant, i thought it was the end and felt a mixture of sorrow and relief. Then she started again about 4 weeks before dd2 arrived, seemed easier to let her than to say no at an already difficult time for her. She's now having a feed a day. So it might not be the end after all.