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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Advice needed please by 7pm if poss (please be around Tiktok , Hunker or other v knowledgeable bods)

19 replies

Twinklemegan · 03/02/2009 18:03

Hello. Bet you didn't expect to see me back in this topic just yet. I need some advice for a good friend. She's back in hospital 4 days after giving birth because she has neck pain following an epidural. She really wants to b/f but could only do so for the first couple of days before the neck pain became a real problem. She is currently in hospital and formula feeding, but I'm not sure if this is entirely out of choice. I am surprised (or am I?) that no attempt has been made to help her feed, help her find different positions etc.

What I'm asking (before I phone her this evening) is what could/should the hospital be doing to help? Would she be able to pump do you think? And how long can she go without b/f at this early stage before she will be unable to start again?

Expert advice or personal experiences v much appreciated. (I can't look any of this up because I have lent her my books, although I will go and browse t'internet just now).
Thanks very much.

OP posts:

giantkatestacks · 03/02/2009 18:08

sorry to be dim - why exactly cant she feed with the neck pain - is it the pain itself or the position or what?

sorry for replying btw - am not a knowledgeable bod...

Rascal1979 · 03/02/2009 18:11

Why can't she breatsfeed? surely they could help at the hospital with positioning and help hold baby?

If she is really in too much pain she needs to pump lots - every 3hrs day and night to keep up her supply and do as much skin to skin with baby to kepp her supply up.

Double pumping is the best way to up supply.

I spent 9 weeks pumping on NICU before going onto exclusively bf dd to 7.5mths and still going strong at 14mths. So long as she pumps regularly including through the night she should be able to maintain her supply.

However the best thing to do is to feed if at all possible. The rugby hold with loads of pillows for support on feeding lying down may help.

Original poster

Twinklemegan · 03/02/2009 18:12

Sorry - that sounded all wrong in the title. I'm not exactly clear at the moment why she can't feed. I think it's the position, or that she can't look down to get the positioning right, or something. She's on strong painkillers as well - again I'd appreciate any knowledge about that. I'll know more later, it's just I don't want to spout a load of rubbish at her. It's a while since I breastfed and I've forgotten a lot of stuff. And I just don't trust that she's getting good advice.

OP posts:

giantkatestacks · 03/02/2009 18:13

the painkillers will be fine - you can feed on selfadministered morphine every 3 mins...

giantkatestacks · 03/02/2009 18:15

a mirror opposite would be of some use then with the positioning? theres always ways round things.

Is the baby feeding from a bottle or a cup/syringe?

Rascal1979 · 03/02/2009 18:16

I expressed and fed DD my milk whilst on morphine and a whole cocktail od painkillers and antihypertensive drugs with no adverse effects (and she was 9 weeks ealry and a tiny 2lb 1oz!). If any of the drugs she is taking are contraindcatory on BFing there will be an alternative that she could take.

If the prob is she can#t see if she is latching on proerly surely the staff can help with this.

Original poster

Twinklemegan · 03/02/2009 18:20

I would certainly hope the staff could help - I don't know the exact circumstances yet as I've arranged to phone her a bit later. I'd be surprised if a cup is being used though. One problem I can see is that her mother never b/f and is pretty anti the whole thing, so I think she might be getting loads of negative and defeatist stuff thrown at her.

If she's decided it's all too much after a pretty traumatic birth then I wouldn't dream of interfering with her decision. But if she's being leaned on, or getting crap advice, I'd like to help her counter that.

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Original poster

Twinklemegan · 03/02/2009 18:21

at your dd's size rascal! Well done you for perservering through all that.

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GreenMonkies · 03/02/2009 18:28

If she can't hold the baby at all she might find lying reclined and using Biological Nurturing positions will work for her.

See also this video and this article.

domesticslattern · 03/02/2009 18:38

You ask about how long she can go without bf at this early stage and still start up again.

My DD was bf for five days, then mixed fed for three, then solely bottle fed for seven (!) and then I changed my mind (loooong story) and was able to start bf again. It took quite a long time and she had to have a few bottles, but it wasn't too late. I get the impression that it is easier if one offers the boob lots and lots in the early days to establish feeding, but that it's not mission impossible if there are a few bottles in the early days, it's just harder.

HTH I am not an expert, just my personal experiences. I also found that when I went back into hospital there was a LOT of support to bf, from counsellors and paediatricians and nurses, everyone offering their tuppence worth. And I could have done without it frankly, there was way too much advice, all contadictory and all of it making me feel like a crap mother. So, how can I put it, just be very careful of overwhelming your friend. You sound pretty sensitive anyway when you talk about not interfering with her decision.

Sending best wishes- it sounds like a difficult start to motherhood.

tiktok · 03/02/2009 18:39

GreenMonkies has given some useful clips.

I don't see why neck pain should stop her bf, but make it possible to formula feed - there just isnt that much difference in the effect on the mother's neck!

Of course the hospital should be enabling her to breastfeed and to find a comfy position.

Original poster

Twinklemegan · 03/02/2009 18:47

That's v interesting domesticslattern - I didn't realise you could go that long tbh. That's a good point about bottle feeding, Tiktok, although I suspect her mum may be helping her with that.

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Rascal1979 · 03/02/2009 21:04

Thanks Twinklemegan! She's quite a bit bigger now (although still titchy at 15lb 2oz!) and that's mainly down to breastfeeding.

If your friend really wants to feed then there is usually a way.

tiktok · 04/02/2009 08:38

Twinklemegan, milk does not dry up quickly and while it is always harder to establish bf if it does not get off to a good start in the first days, with committment and motivation it can be done. Support and encouragement around the mum is important to maintain that motivation, too. I have known mothers begin breastfeeding from a standing start a couple of weeks in - I have read about mothers starting even later.

Clearly, it's not to be reccommended though!

Original poster

Twinklemegan · 04/02/2009 22:32

Thanks Tiktok. When I spoke to my friend she said that the staff were helping her, but she was finding every breastfeeding position painful. BUT, I spoke to her again today and she has managed to feed today - so that's great news. I'm really proud of her.

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GreenMonkies · 04/02/2009 22:41

I do also agree with Tiktok (surprise surprise!!) that neck pain shouldn't really stop her breastfeeding, after all, if Alison Lapper and Abigail Witchalls can then I'm sure, with determination and good support from family and hospital staff, that Twinklemegan's friend could too.

However I suspect that support and help are the real issue here, it is far easier (for hospital staff and family) to take the baby away and give it a bottle than to find a position that works and allows her to bf.

Original poster

Twinklemegan · 04/02/2009 22:48

Did you see my post GreenMonkies that she's managed to do it again today? I strongly suspect that there has been very little support forthcoming from family, which is why I was so keen for her not to lose heart.

She's very keen to perservere, I know that. I'm very wary of holding an opinion about anyone's level of pain, having had a truly horrific breastfeeding experience myself.

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GreenMonkies · 04/02/2009 22:59

I saw your update after I had posted! I am not holding an opinion on her pain threshold or anything like that, but there will almost certainly be a way to nurse that doesn't cause her pain, even if it is her laid flat on her side totally supported by pillows etc with the baby laid on the bed beside her, if you see what I mean?

Could you get an LLL leader or ABM/NCT counsellor to visit her in hospital. If she has some really good input from someone who has the time to spend with her and who can support her without undermining her desire to bf then she is much more likely to succeed.

I wish her luck, which she clearly has as she has you looking out for her.

Original poster

Twinklemegan · 04/02/2009 23:08

Well I'll definitely send her some helpline numbers at least (I think she's out of hospital now). It's actually a bit more complicated than I can go into here (in case anyone's "listening" IYKWIM). I don't want to interfere too much, but I'll do what I can. Thanks.

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