How do I breast feed????

[memoo]

I know to many of you this may sound like an idiot question, so many of you find breast feeding very easy.

I have had 2 DC and am now pregnant with my 3rd.

With first DC I wanted the breast feed but she was very sleepy and I got absolutly no support from the midwife at hospital and so ended up bottle feeding her.

With 2nd DC the midwife did help a bit but it mainly consisted of her storming in, grabing my breast and trying to stuff it into my baby's mouth. I did manage to breast feed him for 2 weeks but I don't think I ever got him to latch on properly and so my nipples became so sore and cracked that they was bleeding, and so again I gave up.

This time I am desperate to breast feed this baby for at least 6 months, hopefully longer, but I just don't feel like I can get it right.

Please does anyone have any advice about how I get it right this time?

You need proper support; is there a breast-feeding support group near you? Google it and see.

Hi memoo - we're both due in September!
I only have one DC so experience limited, but what I found really helpful was to go to a session where people would be feeding (NCT?) and ask someone who was feeding an older child to show me the technique. I know that sounds cheecky but I don't think she minded, and it wasn't the first thing I said to her!

Hi Memoo. The best thing you can do is get all the info and real life experience that you can - knowledge is power and all that! I would recommend going to a local breastfeeding support group before you have your baby - it's nice to see other women feeding and you can ask questions and get RL info and advice. There are also plenty of books and dvds available (did you get a bump to breastfeeding dvd at your antenatal appt?) I think you can view it online somewhere if you didn't. Keep the bf helpline numbers handy in case you do have problems - so many of us do - very few people find it 'very easy'! I think the most important thing is to have confidence in yourself. You may encounter problems but you should be able to resolve them with the right help and support - so if you don't get it at the hospital - know that you can get it elsewhere.

oops - lots of x-posting!

can I just say before I get flamed that I didn't pull up a chair next to a stranger and stare at her norks

Find your nearest Breast Feeding Network group. They helped me no end!

I'm sure the phone numbers are good too, but I found having someone actually seeing what was going on was great.

I also sat at home, baby in arms, looking at the videos here to see if I was doing it right. I learnt a lot.

Good luck to you.

I agree that it is good if you can get to meet breastfeeding mothers and try and find local groups. RL help is the best thing and someone who can look at the babies latch woudl help you - prob not a MW though they are often not well trained in breastfeeding, in fact NO one should be grabbing your boobs and shoving them anywhere...

I was told by friends of mine that if you feed your baby asap after the birth this is a good way to help get feeding established - I did this with both DSs and was lucky and had no real problems. Also lots of skin to skin and co-sleeping are great for your supply.

IME midwives had good intentions but no time. My HVs were worse than useless.

It does help, as pannacotta said, to feed your baby within an hour or so of birth. I did this with both of mine and they both seemed to know what to do so it was pretty easy.
The most important thing is to learn to get the latch correct, otherwise it will hurt and it doesn't need to.
In the 'old days' before formula you would have had mothers, grans, aunties, sisters etc who could all show you how to do it right. These days a breastfeeding support group will do the job.

It's sad that breatfeeding has become quite marginalised so that many women grow up never properly seeing someone breastfeed a baby.

But yes a support group will help take the place of helpful female friends/rellies...

I believe that the main reason I failed at BF DD was because I was so used to seeing bottle-fed babies cradled facing the ceiling that every time I went to do it, I'd be trying for that position. Recipe for disaster and sore bits!

"Tummy to Mummy" was my mantra with DS. We don't see many women holding their babies flat to them in our society.

Another thing I did wrong was aiming my nipple for the centre of the baby's mouth whereas it's more asymmetrical. Google "asymmetrical latch" and you will find videos explaining it. Good luck

I'm due in in september, hi stealth Maybe we could go round together staring at breastfeeding mothers norks!

Thanks for all the replies, I had a look at that site latrucha and there is a group a the childrens centre just around the corner from my DC's school so I'm defiantely going to get in touch with them.

I agree that a huge part of the problem is never having seen mnay other women do it. I have seen one or two at toddle groups I have visited in the past but never really want to look to closely at how their doing it in case I offend them. But after what stealth said I'm thinking that nobody would actually mind that much.

Ninkynork, what you said is so true, I think i too am so use to see babies in the bottle feeding position that that is how i tried to BF

What are compressions?

a lot of hospitals have infant feeding co-ordinators now who will help you, and the MWs will help you get latched on as well. Most hospital MWs are OK.

Once you are home, local breastfeeding support groups are the best places to get help....try www.thebabycafe.org.uk
Lots of on-lin resources as well...www.kellymom.com and www.howbreastfeedingworks.com. And there are books galore. I've got The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding, but Sharon Trotter's book is good as well as a handy reference.

As stealth said, local NCT group worth contacting for ante and postnatal classes and also they often have a bumps and babies group where you can see BFing in action. Some NHS antenatal classes have BFing mums come along and demonstrate too.

Wow Stealth!! Congratulations

Ignore MWs if they tell you to top up with formula. I didn't and now 6 weeks later DS2 is FF and I hate it.

Only do what you want to do, if you are told to top up and you don't want to then don't.

Hi Memoo. Do you drive?

I have just finished my la leche peer counsellor training and we have a lovely little group here. Email me and I will give you the details. I didn't feed dd1 or dd2 past 3 days and yet I fed dd3 till she self-weaned

Am here if you have any q's

you will get lots of support here (i cannot thank everyone on MN enough helping me BF DS2). also try to find a supportive MW. you can always ask to see someone else if you arent happy.

do you have breastfeeding workshops at your local health centre? i found it helpful for tips on positioning and latching. also i developed a mantra of "see how today goes and he can always have a bottle tomorrow" with DS2. we are still BFing 5months on . its not silly asking how to BF as its a new skill for both you and your baby to learn.

08704448708 NCT Breastfeeding line. They can help you and possible put you in touch with an NCT breastfeeding counsellor in your area too if need be. I had a lot of trouble breastfeeding dd and only got support when she was 3months old so I made sure I had the help iwth ds and he fed well from day 1. Once you and bubs learn how to do it it's easy but it's getting the nack in the beginning that's the trick. Good luck!

Also try www.thebirthden.com link to Dr Jack Newman for video of compressions.

memoo, it took me 3 DC to really believe that I could fully BF a baby!

With the benefit of hindsight I now believe the most important thing to ensure successful BFing for me (apart from information, support etcetc) is a good portion of stubborness . DS3 is quite likely my last baby and I was determined that I WAS GOING TO FECKING WELL BREASTFEED THIS CHILD AND IF IT KILLED ME!! I did not find BFing particularly easy or "natural" and still suffer bouts of insecurity (how much is he getting, how often should he feed, am I feeding to often/not often enough and so on and so forth..) but he is now 10months old and is on his feet and that lovely pudgy way - oh I am gushing, but just give it a go!

Apart from just having decided that I was going to do it (almost) no matter what, the other thing I found helpful was to take it one day at a time - works for alcoholics and worked for just BFing him another day - and all of a sudden he was 6 months old and starting on solids, brilliant!

Good luck!!

Thanks Daisy!

thanks for all the advice guys, I am definately going to go along to the local breast feeding support group nearer to my due date.

Stealth, what date are you due??