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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Made a mistake - can I start bf again

16 replies

tirednewmummy · 09/01/2009 12:00

I have posted a few times before due to problems with supply and now I need advice again.

My ds is 10 weeks old. He was born by emergency cs. I lost a lot of blood and my milk didn't come in until day 6/7. Although he was latching on and feeding enthusiastically he was constantly crying with hunger and becoming dehydrated, so I started suplementing with formula. Over the next few weeks he ended up having more and more formula. Then I made a huge effort with the breast feeding/breast pump and reduced his formula to 2oz per day (from about 10-12oz). Unfortunately that week he lost a little weight, my confidence was shattered and I started increasing the forumula again. By Xmas I was exhausted with breast feeding, pumping, bottle feeding, washing and sterilising bottles and making up feeds. I felt I never spent much time playing with my ds because of it. So I decided to wean him off the breast over Xmas and I gave him his last feed 6 days ago. Four days ago I went back on the pill and it seemed like the bf was over.

Only I have been so down about it this week and I desperately want to feed him myself. Also he has been a bit constipated this week and I feel it's my fault for giving him formula. My dh thinks I'm being silly and that I'll feel better about it with time. But I'm wondering if I could restart breast feeding. I've pumped 2x this morning and I've produced 60ml in total so there is obviously some milk still there. I won't feed it to him as I'm worried about the pill hormones being in the milk. Is it worth my while stopping the pill and persevering with breast feeding again. I don't have any hope of ever exclusively bf, but I would like to be able to give him some milk.

Sorry this is so long. Just wondered what other people think. Should I just learn to accept that bf is over. Or should I give it one last chance?

OP posts:

MamaG · 09/01/2009 12:07

You have had a hell of a time haven't you! Sorry you've had such a rough start with your DS.

I don't have any advice, but will keep bumping for you.

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 09/01/2009 12:16

Why not? You have got 2oz which is brilliant - so yes, you are still producing. My DS is FF but still BFs here and there, as long as you BF a few times a day you and he should be able to carry on. I'm happy that my DS is getting some BM, even if he's still FF, plus I get the lovely times without the stress of making sure he gets enough BM, worrying about my supply etc. Try putting him to the breast when neither of you are stressed (not when he's hungry) lie on the sofa with the TV on, chill, and see whether he feeds. Don't put yourself under pressure (for me, I felt so much happier when I accepted that he was FF and stopped trying to reduce his FM, increase my supply, BF every 5 minutes etc) and see whether you can find a BF relationship that works for you, in tandem with the FF (because unless you have a mega gushing supply still, it's really too late to get ex BF)

PS you can stick the pump in the fridge between pumps, you don't have to wash or sterilise it. Just pour the milk into a bottle that you keep in the fridge, maybe you will have one entire feed by the end of the day

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 09/01/2009 12:17

PS I was soooo upset when I started giving him full FFs, convinced that was the end of BF. 6 weeks later, still BF

madmouse · 09/01/2009 12:17

You are one amazing woman

what a determination to breastfeed!

You have nothing at all to feel guilty about

I would talk things through with a breast feeding counsellor to see what the best thing is for you and ds.

Of course breastmilk is superior, but it sounds like the two of you really need closeness, bonding time, fun, and a bit of peace. Not another lot of frustration and tears, so you need to make sure relactation is right for you.

I admire you, whatever you decide

MamaG · 09/01/2009 12:21

ooh yes good idea about BF counsellor. Ring your HV and ask for a tel number or ring La Leche League, or NCT BF helpline

MrsBadger · 09/01/2009 12:33

kat, it is possible to build up to ebf again - it can be hard work but it can be done

agree a RL bfc is a very good idea

Original poster

tirednewmummy · 09/01/2009 12:33

Thanks everyone.

kat2907 - that is pretty much what I am hoping for. That my ds will be mainly ff, but will still be able to have some breast feeds.

You are right madmouse. I don't want to go back to the tears and frustration. It is a difficult decision. Will a bit of effort with breastfeeding/pump be worth it? Or would I be better off spending the time with my ds? I know my dh thinks I should get over it and just enjoy my baby. I don't know what to do for the best at the moment.

OP posts:

Original poster

tirednewmummy · 09/01/2009 12:34

Thanks everyone.

kat2907 - that is pretty much what I am hoping for. That my ds will be mainly ff, but will still be able to have some breast feeds.

OP posts:

frisbyrat · 09/01/2009 12:39

Breastfeeding is spending the time with your child. A 10 week old does not want or need to play, honestly! Most babies' favourite activity is breastfeeding: you'll be doing him a favour. .

Just bf as much as you can, and then top up with infant formula as you need (can't help on how/when to do this; I've no clue what approah would be least damaging to your breastfeeding. Ask one of the experts on here!)

Original poster

tirednewmummy · 09/01/2009 12:43

It isn't the actual breastfeeding which is the problem. It is the amount of time I spent with a pump in addition to breast feeds, I felt like I was spending more time with the pump than him!

OP posts:

frisbyrat · 09/01/2009 12:44

This suggests that some types of pill are linked to low supply, so I, personally, would stop (I would anyway because I wouldn't like the idea of the baby ingesting hormones at these levels).
Am impressed you're, ahem, 'active' enough ten weeks post-partum to think being on the pill worthwhile anyway.

Original poster

tirednewmummy · 09/01/2009 12:46

I went on the pill because I've been having af every 2 weeks and I hoped the pill woul help.

OP posts:

frisbyrat · 09/01/2009 12:47

Ah. I feel like a fraud here, as I really have no expertise at all, but I shall parrot what I've heard others say until someone experienced comes along!
You cbaby is meant to be much better at extracting the milk than any pump, so dump the pump and bf regularly instead. A cuddling bf at least every 3 hours-ish, topped up with formula straight after if he wants, might work?

frisbyrat · 09/01/2009 12:49

Hmm, af every fortnight sounds odd. Check with gp? I had lochia for about 4 weeks after vb; what's it like after a cs? Is it a proper period?

somebodyhelpme · 09/01/2009 12:51

Is there a babycafe near you? you can ask your hv, I have found them invaluable for help and support, it is no way too late to be ebf, but it will take determination to do it, my friend stopped feeding for a month, and still managed to go back and ebf her daughter for another year, so I know it can be done
You should be congratulating yourself for what you have done so far, and it will do him the world of good to be getting at least alittle bm, I wish you all the luck in the world, I stopped bf ds 3, at 11 weeks, as he wasnt putting on weight and my doc told me to, I so wish I hadnt listened as I still regret it 7yrs on!

tiktok · 09/01/2009 13:01

In a dash, so won;t add much - but there is no need to discard the milk because of the pill, unless your pill is something unusually high in oestrogen.

Breastfeeding mothers usually get the POP pill because the 'normal' oestrogen (combined pill) containing pills may have a very slight impact on supply.

Check toxnet.nlm.nih.gov and search on oral contraceptives, and if your pill is normal, with a low estrogen amount, then I can't see why you would be concerned about the tiny tiny amount of hormone in it - the site frisby links to is reassuring as well.

Good luck and hope you get good help.

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