Thinking of stopping bf, cluster feeds getting worse :(

[daisydora]

I know this has probably been asked a milion times so apologies for any repition.

DS is almost 7 wks and is feeding every 2 hours, including at night and its killing me. I bf DD (now 2.5) for 6 mths and although she could feed frequently during the day she would sleep for longer stints at night. DS srarted off like this but is getting worse

To matters worse I have a toddler who wakes in the night and will only let me see to her, and a baby he will not be passified by DH while I see to DD. Last night for 2 hours I was switching between the two. I know ff might not make him sleep longer but at least DH could give him a feed. I have tried expressing with with DD I never get time. I feel so guilty for not wanting to give DS what I gave DD.

Sorry if this seems a bit of a tired and emotional ramble....can anyone reassure that this will improve and he will sleep longer than 2 hours??

Firstly I would sort out the toddler and arrange more Daddy time, perhaps some exciting jollies at the weekend. The baby's first few weeks are really demanding and Mummy will often be the only thing that can settle especially when BF. 2.5 is pretty old to still be waking at night.
I co-sleep with my 9 week old, this means I often have a good nights sleep..... he may wake every two hours I'm not sure! Last night he fed at 10, 12, agin at some point and then I've been awake since 5.30. Managed to get all four up, dressed, lunches made, breakfast(ed), and two of hte older off to school, leaving at 8.15am. Point being that I'm not too tired despite feeding dc4 through the night!!
They do have weeks when they feed a lot, too, getting ready for a growth spurt and so it may not last. My baby certainly did this at 6-7 weeks and I am expecting another soon ready for a 12 week spurt.
FF isn't evil though and so if it's right for you just do it, perhaps try a bedtime bottle? And get to bed as early as you can.
I would really try and get a two year old sleeping through though.

Good luckxx

Thanks divineintervention DD was okay till DS came along, she wakes screaming so I don't know if she is having night terrors or not

Have tried getting to bed earlier but last night he fed at 6.30, and fed virtually every hour after that till about 11pm. He just has no routine at all and I worry about that too. Might try a ff top up tonight if I can get an earlier night.

Well poor you, DD may have realised that night time attention is a new option!! Perhaps over the weekend you could make sure Daddy does the settling after a feed so that you literally wake feed and sleep? Get a couple of afternoon naps too.
If it helps I was thinking of ff at 6-7 weeks too but I spoke with Laleche league who were reassuring that it only a phase and it doesn't last long. They need to feed often to build up your supply to then feed more efficiently. I do find my breasts are always pretty full now, whereas then I would think there wasn't enough milk.

I'm sure one of the lovely bf experts will be along soon.

Oh and there's always the stay in bed and feed all weekend option which really boosts supply.

Agree with Divine, try and get your DH to help with your DD at night - perhaps you could offer some kind of bribe if she sleeps through, say a nice trip out at the weekend or an activity she likes in particular.
I found it hard to juggle DS1 and DS2 when DS2 was tiny but don't think it has much to do with feeding really, it is hard no matter how you feed, with bottles someone needs to get up and boil the kettle and make up the feed which am sure is not much fun several times a night.
If you co sleep with DS then you shoudl get much more sleep and try and make sure your DH learns to sort out DD.

I put my 6 week old DS on a routine which solved the cluster feeding problem as he wasn't eating enough at each feed. When I had to let him wait for a few hours he was really hungry for the next feed, suckled for ages then naturally went longer to the next feed.... I didn't have a toddler though at the time!!!

Now DS is a toddler we have solved the night waking with daddy being the strict one! he gets up to him (I never do now) and gets him back to bed - it does take patience but you have to stay away else you'll be knackered....

PS - I don't think BF is your problem here as I think if it is the same as my DS he'll be snacking and will do the same bottle or breast...

thanks for your messages...my issue with the bf is that DS is just all over the place with his feeding. I think i'm trying to rush him into a routine I just can't remember when DD settled down. He can feed for 30-40 mins (both breasts) and then be frantically chewing his hand within the hour. Have tried a dummy but he hates it!

Will speak to DH and see if he will sort out DD more

He's only 9 weeks old though!
Am sure his feeding woudl be equally all over tje place if you were f-feeding, some babies just feed more often than others.
I would suggest trying to ease up on ideas of routine and lower your expactations of his ability to go for long periods without a feed and you will find it makes life easier for you both. Remember babies of this age have really tiney tummies so need to feed little and often, I always tried to think of tiny kittens feeding all night when it got too much for me.
Co-sleeping helps loads at this age or even a bedside cot.