Toddler nursing and limiting solids

[BabiesEverywhere]

Since the arrival of baby 4 month old DS, my toddler 2.4 year old DD has increased her nursing and dramatically cut back on solids.

I have managed (with agreement)to get her back down to three regular nurses a day i.e. Morning, before afternoon nap and before bed in the evening. Although if she is very tired, hurts herself or just needs to nurse, she can and does ask in addition to the regular nursing sessions.

I wasn't to bothered about the recent fussiness with solids, TBH I had assumed that it will resolve itself. To date if she doesn't eat a meal, I just take it away. If she asks for something else, she gets fruit.

My mother has expressed her concern about DD's solid intake and suggests that I am causing the problem by nursing her.

My mother's concerns (at least in part) stem from her feeling that nursing a baby past 6 months is pointless. Hence my DM is more likely to blame breastfeeding for any changes in my DD's behaviour.

As DD was (pre-sibling) eating a LOT at every meal AND still nursing 3 times a day, I feel that her fussiness is just a phrase unrelated to anything else.

Could there be anything in what my mother says ? Or is it just a phrase ?

NB. I am going out shortly, so I might not be able to reply straight away.

I should add that I am happy to be tandem nursing and don't see a need to wean my toddler, just concerned about the solids intake not the milk !!!

Hmm.

Instinct says its a phase.

HOWEVER, having a (non nursing, cows milk drinking) toddler much the same age who also doesn't eat much, I am in the process of cutting her milk intake down to see if that makes a difference.

Could you restrict nursing time? Or nurse after breakfast?

Sensible suggestion, however I do already nurse at least 30 minutes after meals i.e. breakfast, lunch and dinner.

The issue is more complicated, as nursing is not just nutrients it is a way of bonding and a great source of comfort for my daughter. TBH whilst she needs/wants to nurse I don't want to restrict her. My daughter has dealt so well with her new sibling and I honestly think her nursing helps.

Plus what if I cut back on the milk, upsetting my DD and she STILL doesn't eat, at least my way I know she is getting some good stuff.

My mother wants me to cut her off during the day and go down to one evening nurse only. I feel this wouldn't work for us.

Your baby, your decision!

Hi

I don't have a new baby, but I do have a nursing 'toddler' - well she seems more like a child really. She's 3 and a half, 4 next april.

She still has feeds 'on demand' although its not got the same urgency as a baby and she'll negotiate quite happily.

Sometimes when she feeds alot I start to ask her 'do you really want milk or are you hungry/bored/want my attention if I'm doing something else?' She'll usually tell me, although sometimes she still asks for the milk then leaps up saying 'oh, oh oh, I forgot that I AM hungry actually!'

The other thing I did when she wasn't really eating much after being ill for bit was to leave some food near her that would last a while out; bits of fruit, little rice cakes etc. I'd put them in a little bowl in the room she was in so she could help herself. If I did it now I think I'd get a fancy lunch box (to keep them out of the air) for her but she was quite a bit younger then and I only put a couple of things in and topped it up as needed so there was always a couple of choices.

IME cutting down BF to increase solids intake never worked - everybody nagged me to do it, as my DD has never really eaten alot of solids since weaning. DD self weaned at 23 months but I did cut down her feeds as I wanted to get pregnant and BFing on demand seemed to be interfering with implantation. It made no difference to her solids intake and she doesn't drink cows milk as a substitiute to BFing.

My DD now 2.1 is going through a phase of often eating practically nothing and pushing her food away. I think its another lovely phase.

Thanks for the posts.

Good idea to leave snacky food out for her to nibble on, think I'll try that one.

I have 2 years 3 months between my 2 children and am tandem nursing. My youngest is now 16 months. My toddler increased his feeds gradually from one per day to around 3-4 per day in the first 3-6 months of dd's life. He did seem to eat a bit less at that time. Since then, we've cut back again and he now only feeds 3-4 times a week.

What you describe sounds farily normal to me and unless it bothers you, I wouldn't worry

Oh, by the way -the age your toddler is at is a classic time for any child to be fussy with solids, whether bf or not...

Thanks Grendle, very useful information

Wow at tandem nursing for 16 months, how wonderful

Thank you
My 20month old still feeds loads and eats little

My DS, same age, seems to be eating less since the summer, I think he was mega active then, and now we're inside more, there are more opportunities to nurse, & he's less active and less hungry! I'm sure they'll all be tempted by their christmas dinners soon though!
I'm less active too, but unable to cut back on my solids unfortunately!