I don't think I want to breastfeed.

[NoGoodAtCleaning]

Last time, the baby was on my boob 24 hours a day, he did a constant high pitch scream if I took him away from my boob. I was tired and had PND, and I only lasted a week and a bit of bfing. I still had milk 6 weeks after stopping bfing. Bottles were so much easier, particularly cartons of milk. I don't think I want to put myself through it again.

I think the only alternative is expressing with an electric pump (hard work) or only bfing for a couple of weeks, then going onto bottles.

This time it will be a different baby and hopefully you won't have PND so you may find that you love it this time and don't want to stop after a couple of week.

(I'm sure you'll still be tired though, no matter what )

FWIW I have never found expressing with an electric pump to be particularly hard work. If you didn't try it last time, it might be worth giving it a go as it can be nice to have some longer breaks between feeds in the early days and it also gives the Dad a nice chance to do some bonding.

Well it's up to you but I would wait to see how you feel when the baby is born.

You don't ask any questions so I'm not sure if you want any advice or opinions!

I had a permanently attached baby too but luckily did not have PND so obviously can't appreciate how difficult it was for you.

Maybe some better informed people on MN could point you in the direction of sources of support if you do do breastfeed.

There is also the option of mixed feeding. It doesn't have to be 100% breast or bottle.

Mesa- I'm not sure what I want either . I guess just some advice or opinions. I did enjoy the four hour feeds routine with DS.

My 1st baby was like you described - 24hrs on the boob, literally, he wouldn't let go for anything. He would happily drop his bottom lip to puke, whilst maintaining the latch with his tongue and top of his mouth.

My 2nd - she just takes somewhere between 2-10 mins and she is fed and will go quite a while. She is now 8m and feeding her is no problem at all and it never was.

You could just see what kind of baby comes along next time .

try it, it might be different, you might change your mind and if you don't like it you can always change your mind. Which is something that is much much harder to do if you give formula from birth.

Just see how you go. You might have loved BF this time but hate it next time, or vice versa. I can't recommend expressing (if you meant full time), having done it myself, because it really is the worst of both worlds and twice as much work.

Even a couple of weeks of BF would be a great start for your baby and if you hate it again you can stop. Hopefully you won't have PND again this time, no matter how you feed. Good luck

I know exactly where you are coming from with this. I had awful PND with ds1 and hated breastfeeding. When ds2 was born I really didn't want to breastfeed agsin. My midwife showed me the correct way to do it and i gave it a good old try, but still used a bottle sometimes. If you don't feel comfortable breastfeeding then i don't think you should. My mum told me that my brother and I were never brestfed after the colostrum stage and we're fine!

try it again and with more support you might be surprised and your child will have received important protection from the first few weeks.

If you do decide to try again, remember that however difficult it might be in the beginning, after the first few weeks it settles down and becomes easier. Dd2 was permanently attached to me for the first four weeks and is now happy to just feed at regular intervals.

In the end though, you have to decide what you feel that you can cope with and not feel guilty whichever decision you go with.

Obviously don't do it if you really don't want to BUT....

Most babies will feed 24/7 for the first couple of weeks as it is best for them as they have tiny tummies and it is so much better for them to have little and often. But after the first few weeks, it gets less and less and SO much easier.

I Breastfed for 8 months and only stopped due to feeling so crap with morning sickness with the next baby. Breastfeeding was SO much easier than bottles I have to say. The first few weeks are hard with breastfeeding, but if you can get passed that, you have food on tap, it is free, you don't need to take anything with you when you go out except Nappies and wipes and maybe a change of clothes, you don't waste any if baby doesn't drink much etc etc etc.

And there is no sterilizing!! Which is a major bonus to me! And much less washing up!

I agree - try it again, you've nothing to lose. If you don't try then you can't go back if you don't change your mind, so I think it's always worth giving it a bash in case, as others have said, you have an easier baby. I also think second time around you can probably use the knowledge (that it's going to be tough) to your advantage by being prepared for it.

It's also of huge benefit to your baby to breastfeed even for a short period, so on that count definitely worth at least bearing it in mind.

If you really don't want to though, then just don't. Your choice, and it doesn't need to be validated by anyone!

try again! it took me about 12 weeks to get into it. give yourself a chance, it really is rewarding.

I'd say give it a go, and see how you do - as others have said, this baby may well be totally different to your first, and your reaction to the birth might well be different too.

But if you decide that it's not working for you, then use bottles and be happy with that decision - all three of mine were bottle fed because I had problems producing enough milk, and they are all fine strapping lads with no health issues whatsoever. You can make yourself feel better (if you need to) by making lots of lovely home-made vegetable and fruit purees when your new dc starts weaning.

With regards to the PND - can I ask if you have spoken to anyone about preventative treatment?

I had PND after each of my three ds's, and there was a progesterone treatment that you started soon after the birth (I'm sorry I don't remember any further details, but ds3 is 11 now, and my memory is not what it was .

At the time, I attended a workshop by a noted PND expert, who believed that low blood sugar contributed to PND, because if your blood sugar dropped too low, then the receptors in your cells that are programmed to receive progesterone will switch over to being glucose receptors - because your cells need energy more than they need progesterone. She said that once this had happened, the receptors could take days to switch back. She recommended eating some carbohydrate within 1 hour of waking, every three hours during the day, and not more than an hour before sleeping - in order to maintain your blood glucose at a sensible level - not too many peaks or troughs. If I remember right, she suggested carbs that would break down fairly slowly, not sugary/sweet things.

I only mention this because it is a drug-free method that you can try for yourself - and as far as I can see, it carries no risks with it - she wasn't suggesting loads of carbs, just spreading them out through the day, so you needn't gain weight either.

I hope this helps.

Try not to stress and see how you feel when the baby is born. My dd was happy to feed every 3hrs most of the time.

Don't put any pressure on yourself. What is most important is you not being stressed out.

I presume you are posting this because you want people to give you some positives. All i will say is try it, you never know. you will have a very different baby and will be in a much more assertive frame of mind than after your first. give it a week to see hoew you go. Any problems can be sorted and things really are easier when it goes well. Arm yourself with as much info as you can and perhaps see a bf peer supporter or councellor now to discuss your anieies.
If I am wrong then please ignore my post.

I hated BF'ing my DD but loved feeding my DS.I was so glad I had another go. I would just see how you feel after the birth.

I had another EMCS and was expecting to feel crap but I was on a big high for months. (I had PND after my DD's birth). Hope it goes well for you!

god I HATED the first few weeks of bf-ing my PFB - remember seriously vowing to stop after some really hard nights. Also crying a lot when I thought about the advice which says to do 6 months exclusive bf if possible, and thinking it sounded like a bleeding life sentence.

However, my partner was SO supportive and I continued even through some VERY dark days (constant feeding, feeling exhausted etc, just as you describe) and then at about 3 months it just suddenly started working - felt amazing, so much easier and I absolutely loved it! I am so SO glad I persevered because I think lots of people give up (for totally understandable reasons) just before it starts to get good. And you never get a second chance.

I used to be a bit squeamish about extended bf-ing and now I never want to stop - it is honestly the best thing I have ever done.

So if you can face it, and of course assuming PND does not rear it's ugly head again, I would suggest sticking at it.

I didn't manage to breast feed dd1- I literally didn't seem to produce any milk, but more than that, it was painful and didn't feel natural in any way- I hated it. However, I instantly felt like a failure when I 'gave in' to a bottle.

So, with dd2, I was determined to breast feed. Nothing would stop me. Except, dd2 was born without a sucking reflex, and was admitted to SCBU where she stayed for a week, at first not being fed milk at all, then some formula through a tube in her nose. All the while the SCBU nurses and midwives on the ward encouraged my desire to breastfeed, so gave me the breastpump to produce some milk for dd2's tube feeds. Unfortunatly, I produced no milk- in a whole week. I think there was about 3mls of colustrum in that time. In the end, the midwives 'allowed' me to stop- ie. reassured me of the benefits of formula feeding etc, so I wouldn't feel like a failure again.

When dd2 finally came out of SCBU she took to the bottle like a child possessed and hasn't stopped eating since (18 months later!) I did suffer from PND both times, but that could just be me...who knows?

All I can I promise is this- next time, if I'm lucky to ever have another child, I will be bottle feeding, no question. I will not try to breastfeed AGAIN, and fail AGAIN. I will give my baby formula from the start and feel happy with my choice.

Good luck to you

1stly all i can say is dont stress about it. DS1 was only breast fed for 5 days before we moved onto bottles and he would feed for hours. I was disappointed as i'd really made my mind up he was going to be BF.

with DS2 i tried to have a bit more of an open mind and figured that i would give BFing a go and if it worked, well good, and if it didnt, well formula worked OK for DS1 so why not for DS2.

Maybe my open mind helped me relax but 14weeks on, we are still breastfeeding but its a partnership and when i'm knackered, DS2 gets a bottle of formula. he doesnt complain as he's still getting fed and i get sleep.

i would just go with the flow as every baby is different.

I would just like to say that what ever you decide please ensure that your MW knows about your previous PND so that she can get you proper support when baby no. 2 arrives.
I agree with the others, give a try even just one bf will give your baby's immune system a boost. And like the others have said it is much easier to switch to bottle feeding than from bottle feeding.
Best of luck with your pg

Breastfeed if you want to, formula feed if you don't.

It's your body and your baby, I'm sure you're well aware of the pro's and con's of each.

No one will shun you for your decision and if they do they're not worth knowing.

Feeding in the first week is pretty much a 24 hour exercise though so it's unrealistic to expect it to be much different.

I wouldn't make up your mind until you try. EVen if baby just has one feed, it's really important for their immunity!! Then if you decide it's not for you, fair enough, at least you've tried again. you will find it's completely different with a different baby!