Baby will latch on but won't feed or stay attached

[phee96]

This may be long but please bear with me, I desperately need advice.

DD is 3 days old and we have just come home from the hospital. We've been struggling with BF so she has been having EBM topped up with formula.

The birth was very quick - I didn't even have chance to get my top off for skin to skin after. I had suspected pre-eclampsia and DD had passed mec and was in distress. Although she was put straight on my chest, it was over my clothes and was only for a few minutes before she went to DH for 90 minutes. She wouldn't feed on delivery suite or on the ward later that night. By 48 hours later, she still wouldn't feed so began having the top up's.

The problem seems to be that she just own't feed. I can get her to latch on but she will only take a few sucks at the most before removing herself. If the MW's tried to force her head to keep her on, she gets very distressed. She will easily go over 6 hours without waking for a feed and still refuse to suck. She will take the EBM from a cup but just doesn't seem to want to put it all together and now I'm struggling to express enough. Please does anyone have any advice as I'm getting desperate

Something similar happened to me. Take DD to a cranial osteopath asap. It transpired that DS had had his jaw pushed out of alignment during the birth and this went unnoticed by everyone (including me!). By the time I took him, I'd given up BF and my supply had gone. I so wish I'd taken him as soon as there were problems and I'd have been more able to feed him myself.

I fully intend to take my next DC there, even if there appear to be no probs....

Hope this helps

has she been checked for tongue tie

phee96, the absolute best thing you can do is get a breastfeeding counsellor to come and visit. they weill be best placed to see wha tmay be causing her to not stay latched on, and give you good advice on how to get the breastfeeding going again.

I would say though, do NOT push the back of her head. babies have a reflex where if you place something on the abck of their head they automatically will push back. that's why it never works, and it makes me cross when MW's do this because they ought to know better. try holding her in a cross cradle position.

ie, if you are feeding from the left breast cradle her in your left arm. keep your right hand on the top of her back onto her neck a bit to keep her positioned correctly, but without placing too much pressure there.

has she been checked for tongue tie? both my babies were TT, and neither could physically stay latched onto my breast.

Sorry things aren't going well for you . I would suggest you call the NCT's helpline and see if you can get in touch with a local BFC to help you out on a one to one basis. Or does the hospital have an infant feeding co-ordinator? You should be able to see them even after you have been discharged. Or call the CMW and get her to come in to you tomorrow.

There may be something that can be sorted/helped by a cranial osteopath, but I think you definately need advice from a qualified BFC. She may just be frustrated that she isn't getting very much as your milk will just be coming in now at 3 days; try expressing a little onto your nipple so she knows it's there. She may also have been scared by the MW pushing her head onto your breast (wish they wouldn't do things like that ) and associates your boobs with that earlier fright.

In the meantime can you have a babymoon and do lots and lots of skin to skin contact with her, allowing her free access to the breast?

The numbers for all the helplines are here on hunkermunkers blog. There is also a link on there for biological nurturing which may give some ideas for helping her to latch on herself.

I hope you get things sorted soon.

Thank you so much for the replies, i was starting to feel quite helpless. She has been checked for TT and everything seems ok. I'm hopeful that it's going to go a little better now that we're home as I find it much better when DH is around - we all seem to get a little less frustrated as he can calm her down.

It was quite upsetting when the MW's were pushing her head and the feeing co=ordinator for the hospital agreed it was pointless.

I think this evening and tomorrow we will have lots of skin to skin (one of the MW's said this wouldn't help when we were at the hospital). My CMW is due tomorrow so I will speak to her then. Thank you for the links, I shall browse them now while cuddling DD

at the hospital MW saying skin to skin wouldn't help.

I've heard that there is a "window of opportunity" after birth for skin to skin to get things off to a flying start, and while I can understand that the sooner you have skin to skin the better, I think that skin to skin at any time is beneficial; most of my minor BFing problems during the course of BFing my DD were solved by retiring to bed for the day and doing lots of skin to skin.

There is some information on kellymom about babies who refuse to latch.

Good Luck for tonight.

phee - skin to skin is great at any time and is very therapeutic for the babies who have been 'handled' too much and forced. With calmness, patience and doing nothing except cuddling up with your sweet baby, the feeding should just happen. Keep up the expressing and cup feeding while she is still learning

Congratulations on the birth of your DD, sorry to hear you're having problems Phee. I had a very similar problem with DS, he had jaundice and was advised to give formula top ups every 3 hours. By the time DS was 5 days he was refusing to breastfeed altogether and my milk still hadn't come in.

Things I did to get him back on the breast:

Lots of skin to skin. Basically spent a few days in bed with him, co-bathed and co-slept.

Took fenugreek to boost my supply and expressed with an electric pump for 30 mins after every feed (5 min per side, then swap) - which worked out to be 8 times a day as we were following the 3 hourly rule religiously.

Got DH to do the cup-feeds so he wouldn't associate me with 'easy-feeding'. Offered the breast after (or sometimes during) the cup-feed so that he was calm and happy.

Got my latch and position checked at home by a BFC. I discovered that I had to use a cushion so that DS was lying perfectly straight when latching on.

Ensured DH and my mum did brought me food and water and took care of everything else (including sterilising the pump and the top-up cups) so I could concentrate on resting and feeding.

DS is 3 months now and a complete boob-monster so it is possible - but it helps that I had loads of support from my DH and family!

Do keep trying - DS was similar. He wouldn't breastfeed at all for a week, so we fed him EBM from a cup for all that time. Kept trying though, every feed we put him to the breast first, and made sure I had plenty of skin to skin. Every day the midwives visited and helped us try, and then when he was a week old one of them finally got him to latch and feed properly - it was amazing!

After that he fed occasionally for a couple of days, then started latching on every time and has done ever since (he's now seven weeks). So just keep trying, and try different positions - DS's first feed was in the rugby position, which he seemed to prefer for a bit. He always feeds in the cradle position now though.

My milk is coming in today so I'm hoping I will be able to express more so that she has less formula to top up.

I'm starting to worry as my BP isn't coming down and I still have some swelling of my feet so I may be admitted back to the ward if it doesn't improve

Thank you agaikn for the advice, I am hoping to get a BF councillor to the house on Monday but this hasn't been confirmed yet

phee I hope things start to go more smoothly for you. I'm not here to offer advice as I'm having problems with my DD2 - but wanted to offer sympathy. Sounds like you're really stressed. I hope the BF counsellor comes and is a help.