Whats the strangest/most amusing/just plain bizarre comment you have had about breastfeeding?

[waitingtobloom]

From friends/family/health professionals/ random people?

Mine has to be the doctor who suggested I should express and put it on my cornflakes. I didnt - I dont like cornflakes.

Any odd or amusing (at least in hindsight!) ones out there?

[Darkmere]

Ribena?! He/she should be struck off!

[preggersplayspop]

I can remember asking the HV when DS was fairly small how I could start introducing a bottle as 'I don't want him walking up to me and asking for breastmilk or anything, ho ho ho'.

Fast forward to now, when he is 18 months old. He will toddle over to me, pull down my top and say "BOOB" in a very loud voice whenever he is hungry....

Never did get that bottle thing sorted.

[AnarchyAunt]

Ex MIL "Eeeeh you're not big enough up top to feed a hungry girl like that, she needs a bottle wi' a bit o'rusk"

If breast size is an indicator of BF success then will she please explain why she did not BF her two, despite having tits down to her knees an ample bosom?

[waitingtobloom]

Ribena?? Full fat coke at least lol. Or perhaps a glass of wine?

Absolutely love the idea of different drinks coming out of them!!

[TheNinkynork]

From my Mum:

"But you're just lucky that you can feed DS. Most women simply can't. You couldn't feed DD for example"

[waitingtobloom]

Ninkynork - ouch that must have hurt

[HappyandEiknowit]

i was told by my DHs nan when DD was 2 weeks old just how 'selfish and pompous i was BF my DD' as i am 'making sure DH never forms a bond with his daughter' i said what a load of crap!! i happily reminded her that her DH was not well bonded with his DD and DS when they were bottle fed infants as she is so fond of reminding everyone (usualy to the tune of you should be grateful DD- my mil btw- i raised you almost singlehandedly yada yada yada etc)!!!!
she also tried to tell me that my 6 week old DD was getting too big for the breast and is ready to be weaned... she then said after i said she cant even sit up on her own yet but you want her to eat solid food and obviously in a few weeks i can send her out to do the weekly shop so i can put my feet up excellent plan 'well she likes the honey on her dummy so she must be ready' she didnt mind my DD for a LOOOONNNGGG time on her own after then as everyone was up in arms over this one!! cue my 'honey has botulism in it' rant and storming out into rain with DD hastily put in pram
some people are so old and naive
xx ei xx

[sunnygirl1412]

My elderly neighbour once called me out into the garden to inform me over the fence that she'd heard ds1 crying a lot - we were trying to reestablish breastfeeding after he'd been in an incubator having phototherapy in hospital and they'd made me top him up with bottles.

Her advice - to give him a bottle of sugar-water!! Needless to say, I ignored her suggestions - though I never did get breastfeeding re-established, and ds did end up bottle-fed (as indeed all three have - I'm pretty much a failure at breastfeeding).

sunnygirl.

[TheNinkynork]

Thanks waitingtobloom but there were no actual physical reasons why I couldn't have continued to BF DD, bar the fact that my milk was apparently crap because she wasn't going four hourly from birth and liked to feed all evening so was clearly starving.

Pre-Mumsnet it was, I just knew better when DS came along. Nobody saw his face for weeks, just the back of his head

[KristinaM]

my Hv at DS1's 8 montsh check

" Are you still feeding him? Well you'll be wanting to stop that soon"

[whyme2]

I thought it was cruel to not feed your child???

[ilikeyoursleeves]

Not so much a comment but when DS was tiny I was BFing him at the inlaws and FIL insisted on measuring the length of DS while he was feeding! He had the tape measure out and everything! Right next to my boob!

Very odd indeed.

[elvisgirl]

A woman at my mothers' group said she gave up breastfeeding her newborn after a week because the baby wanted feeding every 3hrs & she couldn't get enough sleep or do anything around the house.

[melpomene]

I'm not sure if this is quite in the spirit of the thread, but the most amusing one I've had came from dd2, when she was about 2, "That one's spaghetti" (pointing at my left breast), "and that one's sauce" (pointing at my right breast).

[mumnosbest]

When bf ing my very new (then) ds under a cover, my niece asked what I was doing. I said giving him his breakfast. She was very interested and asked 'What' he was having!

[LadyOfRObamaffle]

I don't think it's right breastfeeding once they can talk

From DHs aunts partner. DS didn't talk properly until nearly 2 though so fair enough!

I would have fed (DH) but my milk dried up

From MIL. Ok then!

[mybabywakesupsinging]

lol melpomene.
"it has to be mummy who gives x (baby brother) his milk because daddy has too much fur. I will breastfeed my elephant because I have no fur" ds1 age 2
The surprise expressed that babies can have food and still bf.
I love the human food quote.

[WhatSheSaid]

Not comments as such, but my MIL being apparently unable to actually say the word "breastfeeding" so instead saying...

1. Is she still eating you?
2. Is she still enjoying mum?

[whomovedmychocolate]

Whatshesaid - my mum still says 'are you still feeding her yourself

No, we give her a tenner and a copy of the menu from the nearby chinese

[whomovedmychocolate]

link to the human food comment for those who missed it Still makes me laugh even now!

[TheNinkynork]

Oh I had no idea it was on here too. PMSL when I saw it on Aitch's blog. I almost felt sorry for the poor HV.

Almost



Cheers!

[waitingtobloom]

DS calls my left breast "baby breakfast" and my right breast "baby more breakfast"...

[wontbepreggersagain]

my classic was a shocked little old woman who asked incredulously "how do you feed twins- you've only got two breasts" yes two babies two breasts- not sure why she couldn't do the maths

[purplemonkeydishwasher]

DS got his first 2 teeth at 20 weeks. the HV was quite shocked and said 'and you're still feeding him??'

[KatieMorag]

comment this morning from 4yo DS

" when you and dad die I can look after M [DS2 aged2] if you can get me some breast milk in a bottle"