Calling all extended b/feeders & co-sleepers..

[Pish]

Are there any of you who haven't resorted to night-weaning? Any stories/experiences gratefully received... Thanks!

Wow everyone, thanks for your input. It's really good to know I'm not alone!

LoveGigi, I've had two periods now, just as I was beginning to worry a bit. I do know other people who've b/f for a long time, but they all seem to have got their periods back after a year max. Obviously they weren't feeding as much as they said they were! I didn't get a sniff of a cycle until I day-weaned dd a bit. It was the first time I'd had a feeding break longer than a couple of hours.

Just another quick question, if anyone is still following the thread. When your lo's wake and feed during the night, do they go back to sleep fairly quickly? On average, how long do you think you're awake at each feeding?

Thanks!

I'm still here!
DD2 goes back to sleep really quickly - maybe 10 minutes max. Usually: sometimes she wants to play at 4 am which receives short shrift. Sometimes she finishes feeding but is still awake so I have to say sleepytime quite sternly: she cries a bit but lies down and goes off in less than a minute. If it is 5ish or later she might be less cooperative ;) If it is after 6.30 or therabouts I sometimes whisper go and see daddy and she toddles off to the spare room so I get some more kip
She's 23 months and I am still period-less (hooray): it was 21 months with DD1 and coincided with her sleeping through.

golly I'm loving how this thread's pulled you lot all out of the woodwork

we didn't night-wean per se, but after ds's premolars came through (17m) my nips were in bloody agony - he was using me as a dummy, and to avoid milk he was doing a lazy latch that pinched and left me raw. So I started trying to stop him doing that, and it kind of had the effect of mostly weaning him. I wasn't entirely ready for that and a bit sad, but keen to ttc and still no AF so perhaps it's for the best. And it's no 100%, he still feeds about once per 24hrs.

funnily if he does wake at night he just wants to latch on, then he lets go after 30 secs and that often seems to settle him.

My hat is off to you ladies still going at night

I am sssooo of your lack of periods for extended time...my DS was born mid Oct and I got my first period on the Christmas morning...It had been the first night when he slept for more than 4 hours

clearly built for making babies...had really text book birth too...very neanderthal

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i stopped feeding at night about a year ago but it was only once or so then anyway. ds is 3.6 and nobody knows he is bf, what kind of loony would i be to publicise it?

pish my periods came back at 3m and i fed ds 2 hourly for 9m so you can see all our experiences differ, not to do with frequency. there is another recent thread about bf and difficulty in conceiving.

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Ahh! Your arrangement sounds lovely Danae! I wish my dd would accept some daddy care. Either day or night would do... it's not as though he isn't willing.

I think I could cope fairly easily with two or three night wakings, we've been on 7-9 times a night for the past two weeks, yesterday we gave up at 4am, cuddled together on the sofa until the sun came up. I reckon she's just an insomniac, poor baby. She used to feed continually during these times, but now fairly happily accepts it when I tell her it's enough.

I always had hopes that one day she'd be ready and eager for her own bed/room too, then the other day I heard about an 11yr old who still insists on co-sleeping

Danae - perhaps it's because she has you at night that she's so indpendent during the day?
She's getting lots of cuddles and mommy and daddy time at night that she doesn't need it during the day IYSWIM?
sounds like a great situation though because your DH is involved in sleeping. my DS is just starting to cuddle in with his dad. I love it - mostly because it gives me a break!!

pish, ds is only just getting the hang of his dad too - something dh found v as he adored ds from the start but only mama lovin' was good enough.

but "dadda" is the only thing he's ever called out in his sleep and he is now starting to snuggle up to dh sometimes in bed - like danae's dd he likes to spoon up to me mostly. or sleep on my head!

but he is like that in the day too. in his ideal world he would sit on my lap or in my arms all day...

I love this thread. I love knowing that I am not the only one still co-sleeping and breastfeeding throughout the night, and working full time outside of the house during the week. I feel so bouyant and happy and in great company!

DS is 19mo. He goes to sleep in a cot at 8pm; he gets a bed time feed but has just started (this week) preferring to chat and sing and cuddle rather than bf to sleep (so bedtime is a LOT longer affair than before when he'd just feed for fifteen minutes and knock right off).

I get to bed at 10:30pm. He wakes up about an hour later, max, and I bring him to bed, he has a short feed (ten minutes), then rolls away, then latches on for a few quick sucks, then rolls away, and does this four-five times before settling down.

He wakes up for a feed probably four-five times a night, and they last anywhere from five to twenty minutes.

I've toyed with the idea of night weaning, but to be honest I just don't have the energy .

He is also just starting to get into daddy and accepting his cuddles...now I just have to get DH to come to bed reliably rather than falling asleep (and staying asleep) on the couch!

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I've never gone for the 'manipulation, she's out to get you' theory either. It makes no sense to me that it's apparently ok to b/f if the child is hungry, but not for comfort. More important I'd have thought. If child is hungry, you can give food, where the hell else with the child get mummy comfort?

Maybe unrestricted nighttime attention really does make for a confident child. For all dd's clingyness to me, she's incredibly confident. Especially given that she's never been left with anyone other than dh and doesn't go to nursery.

A bit too confident actually, especially in the swimming changing rooms, when she'll point at some poor womans bare boobs and yell at the top of her delighted little voice "Look mummy! Look! Mowkies!!"

Pish - what a great name for them! My 21 month ds's term is 'nanuk'. The other day he ran down the aisle in Tesco's shouting 'nanuk bras' 'nanuk bras' excitedly pointing to the lingerie racks. Also, in attempts to make polite conversation with the young lad at the check-out, ds shoved both arms down my top and told him 'nanuks, nanuks'. Thank god it made no sense to the checkout guy!

But yeah, we too lead a secret life of co-sleeping and breastfeeding through the night. Like pps have said - it is a roller-coaster ride of crushing exhaustion and major pay-back in terms of comfort and cuddles, not to mention more independent and sociable kids.

I think they do get to a point where they can be sort of reasoned with (at around 4 am), when my ds, for example, is most likely to go back to sleep without totally freaking out if refused the breast. I can see him starting to employ little tactics to put himself back to sleep when he wakes during the evening, and I am sure this is a natural progression which just needs gentle encouragement rather than being forced.

Mowkies - Nice.

DD1 - milkies, all fine until your 4 year old is screaming at the top of her voice "iwant mummy milkies" when falling over...

DD2 - was "this" which I thought was pretty good until a friend asked it mildly horrified tones "did she just say TITS?"

We have brainwashed nudged her into muppies now.

Phdlife - that is interesting about the lazy latch =no milk. I have been having a lot of probs with dd2 and this, I must listen for swallowing when I put her to bed .

Mowkies isn't the best choice word, but I was lulled into a false sense of security by dd being so late to talk!

Unfortunately she's improving everyday and it will soon be a nice clear "MILKIES!" that no-one can mistake. Looks like there'll be some fun times ahead

They get some interesting latch techniques as they get older, don't they? Mine likes to suck it in through closed lips at the mo..

My ds has very clear speech now. There is no mistaking when he says "mummy, I want your milk" "but why can't I have your milk mummy"

He did talk about boobs for a while, but now they seem to be "milks".

We were at the city farm yesterday and saw that the pig had about 10 "milks" (don't know the exact number on a pig!!) and ds thought it would be hilarious if mummy had 10 milks too.

DS calls it Guppa. and now that he's not nursing anymore (for over a YEAR FGS) he still likes to tell me how much he loves my 'guppas'.
new baby arrives in april. not sure how that's going to pan out. he's convinced that he's going to get small again and he'll have one guppa and the baby will have the other. rough times ahead me thinks!

It's been so great to hear from other people who are in a similar situation to me, I feel a lot better about what I'm doing even if the sleep deprivation is killing me slowly but surely!

Well, I had a lovely offer tonight. When I said I was a bit too tired to race around the house for the 50th time making aeroplane noises, dd yanked up her t-shirt and said "Have some my mowk mummy. Make you feel betta".

Danae - absolutely loved your post. Makes absolute perfect sense to me and dp (who i read it out to). Thanks for putting that into words.

Mybabywakesupsinging - thanks

Well i posted the whole, my baby sleeps through and lo and behold he is waking lots again (was every 2 hours that night), but we have another new tooth to show for it and another is definately on its way. I know ds2 is only nearing 10 months and i hope to feed him for as long as he needs. I do want to sart ttc though and wonder how much this will affect it.