Breastfeeding & sleeping through the night

[CeylonSapphire]

I suppose it's my own fault for reading too many books, and asking too many questions:

My 20wk dd was a dream when we brought her home from hospital - down at 8, woke at 4.30 for a feed, then through til 8. At 3.5months this all changed - recently it became up every 2 hours for a 1/2 hour feed - which was draining. (Now she's up 3-4 times per night, sometimes taking just 10 mins and falling straight back to sleep, sometimes having a full feed of 35-40mins)

I started to read around re: sleeping through the night. The book I read suggested that at 4 months they should start doing this, and if they wake, comfort them and put them back to sleep etc... (no feeding) [I haven't tried this yet - too soft hearted]. HV said today that I shouldn't worry about sleeping through the night til DD is on solids, and enough of them to make a difference, and to carry on feeding during the night.

Who should I believe? Shall I carry on bf'ing through the night? Or try the pickup/putdown method?

Any help, advice, first hand experiences etc most gratefully received!
TIA.

she is 20 weeks? definitely go with what HV has said.. feed her through the night...especially if she is feeding every time she wakes.. you could try co sleeping to make it easier on you.

she is too young IMO for any sort of sleep training

It's probably a growth spurt, she knows Mummy makes the best milk at night so that's when she wants to tank up.

My advice, ignore the books, your baby read The manual before she was born! (Unfortunately the placenta grows a different book for each baby but baby knows what to do!)

Good lord. This may be the first time I have ever said this on a MN breastfeeding conversation, but...

I agree with your HV!

children sleep through the night when they are ready. There is no magic age when they "should" be doing it. It's a question of them individually being developmentally ready.

You can have a battle royal with your child over whether you feed them at night or not. Or you can feed them, and have a much better chance of a good night's sleep. And a truly contented little baby

And what lulumama said. I wouldn't even put an age on sleeping through the night it varies too much. Do you always sleep through the night?

What the HV said.

I had a horrible urge to read baby books (still do!) - Gina Ford, the Baby Whisperer... but if you must read someone, I would reccommend Deborah Jackson, who basically (along with lots of advice and encouragement) says you're her mum, you're all she needs, and you're doing a fantasic job!

Throw away the books. They will only worry you.

alternatively the books make very convenient cot blocks should you need them -have found the baby whisperer particularly good

Many thanks for your words of wisdom - I really should learn to trust my instincts, and like domesticslattern says, throw away the books!

HV is talking sense though don't hold her to it

Both DD and DS bf for 14 months. DD slept through at about 13-14 weeks (until we took her camping at 7 mths but that's another story!), DS slept through at 13-14 MONTHS . We hoped that all the usual things would work - starting solids, getting more active, moving out oof our room, having formula last thing at night, walking (which he did at 10 mths!!), dropping a daytime nap, etc but none of them did, he just did it when he was ready to.

He's now 2.10 and sleeps a good 12 hours most nights

HV is talking sense though don't hold her to it

Both DD and DS bf for 14 months. DD slept through at about 13-14 weeks (until we took her camping at 7 mths but that's another story!), DS slept through at 13-14 MONTHS . We hoped that all the usual things would work - starting solids, getting more active, moving out oof our room, having formula last thing at night, walking (which he did at 10 mths!!), dropping a daytime nap, etc but none of them did, he just did it when he was ready to.

He's now 2.10 and sleeps a good 12 hours most nights so there is hope, it just doesn't feel like it when you are SO sleep deprived.

Ooops

Wow! A HV who talks sense What a refreshing change.

Go with your HV's advice.

Hi I just joined up in a bid to educate myself in what i'm doing wrong. My baby is 5 & 1/2 months and is still feeding every 1 & 1/2 hours every night. I'm becoming really tired now. I bf him to sleep and always have. I couldn't do cc I don't agree with it, but at the same time the girls I know who have done cc do get a good nights sleep. Any advice? he's sleeps in our room and have stopped bringing him into our bed which only bothered him for a night or two. Can't have him in there really because its so crammed in there that my partner doesn't sleep if I Do!

Another thing any tricks on introducing a bottle at this age? he's interested in it but he can't seem to get more than about 10ml out of the bottle and then he wants breastmilk.

And for some reason I keep reading these threads thinking that someone will say something different. Am slowly getting it through my head that DS (24 weeks) may not let me sleep through the night again for another year. It isn't easy. DH has offered to do CC all this week...hence my scouring MN at 7 am on a sunday hoping for an alternative!

Aah, you've given away the culprit by mentioning the "pick up/put down" method. Now I know I will be jumped on, but that book (Baby Whisperer) is utter utter twaddle. One of my friend's DH is refusing to have any more children because she followed it so slavishly with their first that she made both their lives a misery. Please put it in the bin - I would normally say give it to a charity shop but I would hate to think of someone else falling victim.

20 week old babies usually need feeds during the night. Sounds like yours is one of them.

And it's too young for controlled crying as well -I'm not against it per se if it works (does with some, not with others) but even Dr Ferber who invented the system says it is not appropriate for an infant under 6 months.

Forget to say, it's a bugger isn't it -I've got a wakeful child too (started sleeping through the night at 9months after a bout of CC but now at 18 months is teething his molars and just wants "mama, mama, MAMA!!!"). I console myself that it's just because he loves me so much.

Agree with Georgimama - reading books can send you mental. I hardly read any with dd1 and ended up being chilled out mum. With dd2, I made the mistake of buying a load and was, instead, neurotic mum. One day I put them all away and got my sanity back...

... and did cio methods after six months...