What causes severe breastfeeding aversion and why can it persist?

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What causes breastfeeding aversion?

I had it severely with dc1 and had to very abruptly stop. Dh had to bottle feed though as even seeing DS feeding from a bottle triggered it. Thinking about ttc but when I watch something baby related and see a baby feeding breast or bottle it triggers the same feeling ? Why is it still so severe?

Did you have any trauma/ PND associated with your birth / pregnancy or early months ? You might want to think about hypnotherapy or EMDR therapy.I didn’t have it bad but think I developed a lot of stress and anxiety as both my babies were ill from birth and losing weight, so I was told by staff I had bottle feed plus I developed bad PND both times…it did mess up my thoughts somewhat. It made me feel sick to see other mums feeding, sadly.

No I was generally fine then just suddenly one day hated the feeling of breastfeeding so much like I wanted to stop that instant and run away!!! The second he latched it was like an instant feeling of wanting him off my skin was crawling. I had to stop but seeing him latch to a bottle did the same ?

Aversion in the mother, not the baby, you mean?

There is a condition called Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex that basically triggers a strong feeling of dysphoria (despair, depression etc) for a few mins when the milk lets down.

Google DMER. It doesn't really sound like this is what you mean tbh, but it is real and separate from PND etc - a hormonal trigger.

I had this with my twins: I could feed them separately but the physical feeling and my visceral reaction of trying to feed them together was just awful. It just felt unbearable. 😬

I was going to say DMER as well. It’s got something to do with dopermine (can’t remember all the specifics)

One really random tip that can help is drinking something really cold, ideally with menthol when the feeling happens. Again, don’t know why it works but several women have reported that it does.

I do think hormone ups and downs can cause all sort of strange responses. I think sometimes women develop this when they have just had enough , perhaps it’s an evolutionary mechanism of saying right it’s time for the next baby, seeing as sometimes BF can prevent ovulation and normal return of cycles?

Wow, I have never heard that term but 100% recognise those symptoms from my breastfeeding days. It was the worst feeling ever - the only good thing was I knew it wouldn't last long. Like being sunk into the deepest depression with no warning. It was worse in the early days of breastfeeding.

Some women say that it feels like they want to ‘throw the baby across the room’ when it latches. They wouldn’t do that of course, but it’s a super scary thing.

Thankfully it is being talked about a lot more in lactation support circles. If you or anyone you know are feeling like this, please please seek support. We also know that stopping breastfeeding before they planned or wanted can lead to feelings of grief and trauma (usually made worse by well meaning people dismissing how someone is feeling by saying ‘fed is best’ or ‘happy mum, happy baby’)

It is so bad it makes me want to not even try for another as I still can’t even tolerate seeing a baby bottle feeding? It’s it’s awful

I’d suggest chatting to someone. Perhaps give the NCT infant feeding line a ring. It’s staffed by infant feeding counsellors and part of their job is to listen and help you explore your feelings.

Oh how interesting, I was feeding my first born through my next pregnancy and from about 20 weeks pregnant I suddenly got this and it was awful. I kept feeds as short as I could/started cutting some out and when baby was born it was okay again and I could tandem feed, then suddenly when baby was 3 months old it came back! But only when my toddler nursed, not the baby. So I had to stop feeding him. It must be a hormonal thing, did you maybe go on a contraception around the same time or anything changed?

My periods had come back and I’d started the mini pill so maybe it was that ?

I breast fed DC1 no issues, DC2 on reflection I definitely had DMER.

Around 8 weeks old anytime baby latched my mood would plummet, very frightening, I persisted for a few weeks, but had to stop in the end,

I struggled bottle feeding to begin with, I think I worried that eventually the intense low mood would be triggered by the bottle, but (and I understand this sounds odd) luckily it just caused a bit of anxiety whilst I got use to it.

My advice, have a couple of plans (A, B. C) and just see how it feels when the time comes.

I went through probably two years of this (over different babies)before I realised something was weird and googled it. No breastfeeding expert ever mentioned it. I'm kind of evangelical about getting the word out about it because knowledge of it is essentially the cure!

Hormones.

Nursing releases oxytocin and prolactin. While oxytocin promotes bonding, aberrant signaling or interactions with cortisol (the stress hormone) can trigger sudden feelings of irritability, rage, or skin-crawling discomfort. Rapid dopamine drops can cause waves of anxiety or anger when milk drops and your period or becoming pregnant again can cause heightened nipple sensitivity which makes these shifts more noticable.

please do seek support - I'm so, so glad I had a second baby but your thread has made me realise those visceral feelings can really persist and if you are still getting feelings when seeing another baby feeding, then something like hypnosis /EMDR therapy might help. This is because a visual image is triggering you when the actual hormonal trigger is no longer there. I also had bad sickness in both pregnancies and the sight of certain foods would trigger nausea memories long after the hormonal sickness itself had actually stopped and i'd had the babies. I would suggest asking around /researching to find some resources in your area....although you might not feel you fit the criteria for PND support, often those sort of therapists/counsellors also work with all sorts of difficult topics to do with motherfood, including birth trauma, pregnancy difficulties and other fears. BF support can sadly sometimes attract the sort of evangelical people who struggle to support people from a neutral base. From what other mums are writing on here, I'm so glad people are sharing their stories of negative experiences more easily and hopefully understand they are not alone - it can be the social stigma of not enjoying breastfeeding that stops people seeking help which is a shame as it doesnt allow those feelings to be resolved.