When does breastfeeding start to feel like less of a full time job?

[wishIwasonholiday10]

I’m 5 weeks into trying to breastfeed my 2nd baby but it still feels like it’s taking up all my time and preventing me going out and about with my other child and husband as I’m constantly having to find somewhere comfortable to feed her (I get a sore neck and should if I’m not careful about feedIng position). Suspected allergies and poor weight gain are making things even harder and I am meant to be pumping and topping up too which I’m struggling to manage as is. Will it get easier soon? I don’t want to give up at the moment as we would be restricted to the allergy formulas until we have established if she actually has CMPA and she doesn’t like them or settle well after feeds.

I'd devote some time to practising feeding in a really comfortable baby carrier. I used an ergobaby embrace and by dropping one strap down I could feed on the go in the carrier with most of the baby's weight supported. It's not hands free feeding, you still need a hand for their head, but you do have a free hand so can still help another slide climb up to a slide for instance. At six weeks most babies tend to ramp their feeding up but by ten weeks I'd say they are hugely more efficient and can take a full feed in about ten mins (but will continue to suckle for long after that for comfort if you're sat down).

Have you been to a drop in or seen a lactation consultant? They may be able to help you with several of these issues.

Did your first baby have CMPA? What symptoms does this baby have?

with the suspected cmpa it is so stressful trying to pinpoint triggers. we found that minimizing environmental allergens really helped lower the overall load on their little system

3 months was a big turning point!

Definitely way easier as they get older - you’re in the thick of it right now. It’s a full time - day and night - job. When they’re on solids it’ll be WAY easier but gets considerably easier as you hit 12 weeks. Hang in there! X

Also I would add, midwives would always ask me if my son was feeding every four hours. I couldn’t even tell them how long between feeds as it felt continuous. Both my boys were the same. Honestly it gets way easier but right now you can barely imagine keeping your head afloat. Hang in there - it’s so worth it xx

It's hard in the early days, there's a lot of cluster feeding as well as more regular feeds in general, at about 6 weeks I found hard but it does get easier. My DD has cmpa and soy allergies so it was a lot simpler to feed her than faff about with formula that she wouldn't take. (She wouldn't take a bottle or dummy until 5 months old) I had a lot of ups and downs with breastfeeding, it's a hard toll at times and the best thing at others. DD is 9 months now and it hasn't been a slog for a good few months, apart from a blip at 6 months I think 4 months was a turning point with it becoming less stressful.

I would say 12 weeks started to feel easier as he was feeding a bit less often, but the real turning point was when we started weaning to be honest. We were lucky he took to food very quickly so it became easier for my husband to pacify him when hungry. There is absolutely no harm doing the odd bottle of formula though, if you’re missing time with your eldest. This was what we did on occasion.

I have been trying to get some in person help but between slow C-section recovery preventing me going out on my own (husband was either busy with older child or back at work) and services being shut for holiday period I think next week will be the soonest I can get some help. I have spoke to the breastfeeding helpline but there’s a limit to what can be achieved over the phone.

My first didn’t have CMPA but did have tongue tie which this baby will also get checked for next week. There is a history of CMPA on my husband’s side of the family.

Symptoms were poor weight gain, constant green mucus poo, lots of grunting and straining and occasional blood in her poo. I acknowledge that most of these symptoms could have other explanations too.

When she was almost fully on solids and sleeping through the night so around 12/13 months. Breastfeeding was just hard work for us but I'm hoping I'll have a different experience with my next baby.

First dd was just a really slow and frequent eater and then from around 5 months refused to feed unless there were absolutely zero distractions. I spent a lot of time sat alone in dark bedroom with her. It made leaving the house much harder and very stressful too.

I hope your experience is different!

You're right that they could have other causes but the blood in the stool is a bit of a concern. Baby girls can also bleed a little as your hormones leave their body.

Is there room in your budget for an IBCLC to come out for a home visit? It sounds like you need some in person support.

Good to know there is some hope. We had been giving the occasional bottle of formula (usually about once a day) but since switching to the allergy formula she’s not really settling after a bottle. If we have to go to the fully hydrolysed one it will be even worse as that’s supposed to taste worse than the partially hydrolysed one we have at the moment.

I could afford a lactation consultant but I’m not sure I will find one that’s available due to the Xmas/New Year break. I have the health visitor feeding team coming on 5th of Jan but that’s still a week away.

Breastfeeding is very much an investment at this stage (my second pregnancy was twins) and people would question why I didn't make things easier by moving onto formula. By four months I felt I had things easier than those who had to take formula with them out and about whereas I could settle a baby with a snack or a full feed wherever we went. I did mixed feed however (due to tongue tie in one baby - he only latched at six weeks) the expressing route didn't really work for me and I know people for whom it made life hell on earth and they gave up much much sooner. Despite mixed feeding I was still breastfeeding at just short of two years old and it was invaluable at night, when they were ill, to cheer me up, all sorts really😊They never had ear infections asthma which threatened retreated after one October chest infection at ten months..it saved me so much time and kept me sane and allowed me more time to enjoy my elder child not less.

So short term very very tiring, long term incredibly helpful.

And it protected my health too.

I am in the same boat at you right now. Don’t give up. Your baby won’t be this demanding forever. Enjoy it while it lasts

Getting comfortable whilst feeding was a big issue as I had back problems and walking a bit was helpful( without pushing a pram or buggy) perhaps with baby in sling. A really good straight backed chair with arms and pillows. Thermos snacks all set up. Films. Just reorganising day to go out only for walks not outings too much. Scaling back goals not pushing myself too hard after a caesarean etc but gentle exercise in form of strolls not anything else like bedmaking or hoovering or carrying shopping /bending.

Personally, I'm not sure it ever felt like a full-time job, but I had a very efficient feeder, and then she'd feed him the sling most of the time from 6 weeks. Not because 6 weeks was a magical point but that's when I first tried it, when she was hungry and in the sling on a plane during landing.

So from that point, I was basically a kangaroo and just got on with my life and she fed. So I'd push my youngest on the swings, do colouring with her, make a sandwich, prep some food etc at the same time.

I do accept. I got pretty lucky though that there were no breastfeeding difficulties, she was pretty much plug and play. I'd have gone insane if I was stuck on the sofa!

I think around 4-5 months my life got easier than the mum friends who were formula feeding. Baby got so much more efficient, almost overnight, and started sleeping better so I didn't feel like a cow every 2 hours.

At 6/7 months it felt like the easiest thing ever! I found weaning to be a bitch (CMPA baby here, plus egg and soy allergies too) and breastfeeding was actually the easy part.

He's 16 months now and I'm still BF as it's super useful

So it's an investment in the future, like another poster said.