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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

I bf'd in public for the first time and...

26 replies

LookingForwardToSummer · 06/06/2008 14:28

...it was fine I'd been nervous about it in case of horrid comments, (started a thread a while ago to prepare myself)but as I was doing a 6 hr drive to stay with my parents I either had to feed in the car park or in S. Mimms service station. So I settled down with a tea in the coffee area and don't think anyone even noticed. Worst bit was carrying baby, tea, choc cake, hand bag and change bag at the same time.
I know it doesn't seem like a big deal to all you old hands at bf (or sould that be old boobs) but I am really happy to have got this far with bf, it was so hard to start with. My mother has finally said that she is proud of me for doing it and she can see why i don't want to stop rather than 'just give her a bottle'. She's even taken to saying 'and she's still breastfeeding her' to people.
This probably all sounds a bit gushy and smug but it's the hardest think I've done. I'd really like to help support other women - any ideas how?

OP posts:

scorpio1 · 06/06/2008 14:30

I have a 7 week old and was very nervous about feeding her in public. she is my third baby but first breastfed one.

i fed her for the first time in a cafe when she was 2 weeks.

i have now done it everywhere - bus, hospital, cafes, bowling, everywhere. Now you will too. Well done!

smallwhitecat · 06/06/2008 14:32

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MarsLady · 06/06/2008 14:32

Well done you!

KristinaM · 06/06/2008 14:33

well done. great that your mum is on board now

i have been bf for more than 4 years now ( different babies) and have NEVER had a rude comment from anyone in public

franke · 06/06/2008 14:33

What a lovely post Well done you (and well done for getting to the table with everyone and everything intact ). Pleased for you that your mum has 'got' it and is being supportive - I can imagine that makes all the difference.

wulfricsmummy · 06/06/2008 14:34

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spicemonster · 06/06/2008 14:36

Doesn't sound gushy and smug at all - we've all been there and it is a proud moment! My first public one was at the registry office registering my DS's birth. I was really stressed about it but it was okay. And from then on it was easier and easier till I never even thought about it - becomes 2nd nature very quickly

TheMaskedPoster · 06/06/2008 14:36

Well done you! It is slightly nerve wracking the first time - I remember with my first not going places for ages as I was breast feeding - but once you do it once, you're away.

I purchased one of these for my newest recruit (nearly 11 weeks) and I must say it is great. However, I do see it has increased in price since I bought mine.

TigerFeet · 06/06/2008 14:40

Agree that by doing it you are supporting other women - by normalising it. Sharing your experience is great support too because other women will read your story and realise it's easier than they think it's going to be.

It took me a while to pluck up the courage to do it but once I'd done it once I found it far easier. I went to a breastfeeding support group from when dd was 3 weeks old and made friends there with babies of a similar age. We would all go for a coffee afterwards and sit in the cafe bfing together. Safety in numbers . We never got any comments and the cafe staff were lovely.

Glad your experience was so positive

mckenzie · 06/06/2008 14:46

Well done you!
I can still remember the feeling when I breast fed DS in a public place for the first time in our local park, sitting on the grass, enjoying the sunshine. It was 7 years ago but I wish it was yesterday then i could go out now and do it again!

chipmonkey · 06/06/2008 14:48

Well done! I was paranoid about bfing ds1 in public and I remember bfing him on a train and I was sure that a group of 4 people in the carriage were staring at me. Until I realised that they were all blind!

Mow I'n bfing ds4, I don't care one bit and would bf anywhere!

suzi2 · 06/06/2008 16:22

Well done - it can be very daunting first time. With DS I waited until 8 weeks and did a public feed out of desperation. With DD I was feeding on a bench in the high street at 3 days old. It gets much easier! My gran in law was like that - couldn't see all the fuss... but then was caught declaring to people "she's still feeding him herself" all the time.

I trained as a peer supporter for a local NHS project. I enjoy doing it, I see just a few women a month and help out at a local group. I do plan to train as a BFC at some point, though want to commit more time to it and have more practical experience of helping others under my belt first. BFN and ABM both take on peer supporters IIRC. Or there may be local groups you can attend and help at or other local peer support projects.

suzi2 · 06/06/2008 16:26

Might have got the wrong end of the support thing... if you want to help other women with public feeding the best thing you can do is public feed in a 'normal' manner. Though I did once have a chat with a mum on a park bench once. She was feeding expressed milk as she was too nervous to feed in public. I gave her some pointers and said that if she'd like to join me, she was welcome to and that I'd 'protect' her from anyone who gives her trouble. And she did. Not sure it's a very common situation or discussion though lol.

jingleyjen · 06/06/2008 16:29

Congratulations
it is a real big thing that you have achieved.
now you've done it there will be no stopping you

charchargabor · 07/06/2008 11:55

Well done! I remember how scared I was bfing dd in public for the first time at 3 weeks old. I was sure people would be giving me dirty looks and making comments, but nobody did. At 10 months we're still going strong and feeding everywhere! Congratulations!

NoBiggy · 07/06/2008 12:00

Well done! I was lucky in that there was a post-natal exercise group I went to, so there was a gang of us at lunch afterwards. Then there was a baby site (not this one) meet up so there was another gang of us wopping them out all over a shopping centre.

But, yes, once you take the plunge, it's OK isn't it

nickytwotimes · 07/06/2008 12:01

Well done, looking forward!
I know a few very experienced bfers who still haven't the confidence to do it in public.

There's nothing nicer than seeing a lo feeding happily.

missorinoco · 07/06/2008 12:02

lol at old boobs!
well done you.

DANCESwithLordPottingtonSmythe · 07/06/2008 12:07

Great post! I only did it once with both my dc (fed with babies at my side not in front so found it hard to do discreetly - did feed at other people's houses and in the car!) So well done you! I wish I'd been braver now.

VictorianSqualor · 07/06/2008 12:10

Well done you!
I'm on my second bf baby and still take a moment to brace myself, but I'll feed anywhere

StealthPolarBear · 07/06/2008 12:44

well done!!
keep feeding in public then other people will see that it is done!
i was once in a doc's waiting room when a woman very nervously started to bf her tiny baby. i felt like i should have bf ds at the same time so she didn't feel all attention was on her

duellingfanjos · 07/06/2008 12:54

good on you! I was a bit nervous about the first public feed too, and had managed to get to 5 months without feeding dd anywhere but my home, my parents home and the car . This week i have gone for broke and fed her in Costa, Tesco cafe, Kwikfit (the best way to get your car mended quickly is to get a boob out and watch all the blushing mechanics scurry off into the garage and get working!!), Starbucks and the town square! I think going to a local bumps and babies helps, as you don't mind doing it in front of other mothers, and that makes you bold!

ChairmumMiaow · 09/06/2008 09:48

DS is 4.5 months and we feed everywhere, with a sort of "comment if you dare" defiance. However I was in Hay on Wye on Sunday and after months with only seeing 1 BF mum I didn't know, I saw 1 mum BF a teeny tiny baby and a dad carefully defrosting his bag of EBM. The dad gave me a big smile when he saw what I was doing, and both people just gave me that little boost to my confidence to help me along!

So basically keep up the good work. Oh and don't be afraid to ask for help. A nice lady in John Lewis carried my tray around to the various serving areas, waited for me to pay then carried it back to my table for me, all with a smile!

suzi2 · 09/06/2008 13:17

On that note, definitely ask for help in cafes etc. I often have to ask for a hand with the tray when I had DS hanging on a leg refusing to go and sit in the chair, DD in one hand (as she climbs out of every highchair known to man!) and I have a tremor too. Everyone has always been happy to help.

OrmIrian · 09/06/2008 13:18

Well done! It gets easier.

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