my dd2 just turned 1. i have had enough of breastfeeding. dd2 has not. how do i stop.

[nowwearefour]

i know it would be better for her if i continued til she is 2 but i jsut cant do it. it has nearly killed me to get to 1 and i am not willing to do any more. but i just gave her a cup of cow's milk which she drank enthusiastically and then put her in her cot for her nighttime sleep without a breastmilk feed for the first time in her life. she is screaming blue murder. she is perfectly capable of going to sleep from awake as she does it for every daytime nap and i always make sure she is slightly awake at night too (though admittedly quite dozy from the breastmilk). should i bring it down slowly ie just give her one side. or should i let her scream it out. of course the temptation is to go and get her now and just do the same as normal. but i REALLY do not think my mental health can cope with the tie any more and the impact on dd1 is bad. she was great and we sort of decided to give up breastfeeding together when she was 13 months and i was pregnant again but this time it seems the decision is not mutual! any advice gratefully received. and please not that i should just carry on as tht is NOT what i want to do!

she is still screaming. my resolve is weakening

I'll probably be going through this in about 6 weeks when my DD2 turns 1... no advice I'm afraid, but I'm interested to see how you get on.

But it's very hard when they're screaming and you know how easy it is to stop them and get them off to sleep. Good luck

thanks. hope it goes well for you too!

I know you said it wasn't what you wanted to hear, but if she is that upset I would nurse her.

What about slowly reducing the lengths of her evening feed by a couple of minutes per night or get DH to offer expressed milk in a bottle.

me too hello bodkin

I think you do just have to o cold turkey ds1 self weaned so I am dreading it a bit

am going to get dh to put him to bed the first couple of nights [coward]

yes thanks i think htere is a difference between comforting her on one occasion because i probably did it wrong and carrying on per se. have never expressed for her or offered her a bottle. but dh could just keep re-offering her cows milk i suppose from the cup which she enjoys having. thanks- helped to make me look at things in a different way.

thought i would update. now have done 4 nights with no evening breastfeed. it is getting better. last night made sure she got lots of cuddles and cow's milk before putting her down and she only cried for 10 mins before going off. so definitely making progress. and still offering her morning feeds for now which she is really enjoying....

I too want to stop bf dd who is just 1. I dont have a problem with it, in fact I suspect there will be tears on both sides when I stop but i just feel that she is the right age to stop now. I only give her a feed at bedtime, stopping the morning one was a little traumatic at first but not too difficult once i stuck it out. I am dreading stopping the night time on though. She wont drink milk out of a cup, especially at bedtime. I know that getting dp to put her to bed wont make it easier as she is v clingy to me and I have always been the one to put her down at night. I have tried distracting her with more stories and have managed to reduce the time she feeds but havent managed to get her to go without it completely. I am interested in ways anyone else has managed to do it. She normally goes to bed quite well, and can go to sleep ok on her own except that these light warm evenings have meant she has been a little more reluctant just recently.

it sounds harsh but for us it involved 3 evenings of quite a lot of screaming. but now she seems to be fine. just lots of cuddles and judging when she seems to be sleepy. i found putting to bed at usual time helped too- i had been trying earlier as the feed can take ages!!! all the best with it!