Breastfed 3mo Hen Do Help!

[SuzyQ88]

Hi All,
I have a hen do in 2 weeks and my 3 and a half month old won’t take a bottle.
what do I do? I don’t want to cancel going.
i am trying to coax her onto a bottle in every way recommended!
DH is nervous about having her all day as am I if she won’t feed for 12 hours. I suggested he follows me around for the day (a day in London) but he wasn’t keen on that idea!
Should I just go and let him deal with it? Should I cancel (I’ve already paid a significant amount of money)? Go for half a day?
He hates dealing with her when she’s upset so any attempt at feeding her on a bottle from him or settling her and it doesn’t work he gives her straight back to me. Should I be harsher with him, and be like, you need to learn!
I’ll add that I feel I really need a break and a day out away from a baby and a toddler!
Help Mummas!

Hope she's a bit more chilled out now!

Another question... cow &. Gate do weaning products from four months plus. Would this be an option? She will be four months by this point? Just for the afternoon? Or is this too risky? I had planned to wait till six months to wean

God do not wean early just because of this!!

My DH followed me around our local city when I was on a hen do. He had a nice lunch with the baby and I just had to feed her every few hours.

Get a babysitter or a family member to look after your toddler.

No. I mean even if you believe that it is ok to use this with a four month old, you'd start by giving it alongside milk. So if you are gone 12 hours - that would mean maybe 2 milk feeds and 2 half milk/half this feeds, rather than 4 full milk feeds.

Hello, I've not read the full thread so apologies if this has advice has already been given.
I attended a 3-day Hen do in Paris whilst I was exclusively breastfeeding my then 4 month old who also had bottle refusal prior to me going. I had so much anxiety in the lead up to it.

After lots of trial and error, I managed to get him to take Lasinoh slow flow teats (I put them in a mam bottle, just FYI in case you already had these) but the thing that helped the most was I started introducing the bottle to him whilst he was sleeping (I did it for his dreamfeed and expressed this feed to maintain supply)
Will you be expressing whilst you are out as well? You will probably need to, in order to prevent clogged ducts and for a bit of relief!
I hope it all goes ok x

IMO if the baby won't take a bottle you'll just have to cancel. It's a pain in the arse but they're only a few months old and it's just a part of being a parent to a baby (especially an EBF mum!)

I don't think it's a matter of "he needs to learn" either. It's a perfectly normal response to hand a baby to a breastfeeding mother if it's crying and distressed, wanting to feed. I think maybe you're taking for granted how much easier it is for you to settle the baby than your husband because of the bond you have created due to breastfeeding.

When we were looking to introduce a bottle the midwife suggested it was expressed milk, we tried when the baby was actually hungry (more incentivised to try it) and that I wasn't in the room at all. Apparently babies can smell breast milk from across a room! So they'll know if you're there.

I hope it all works out but if it doesn't, try to plan a special day with the bride to be closer to the wedding day so you can still celebrate with her x

What size teat? My almost 5 month old will only take a bottle if we use size 0 teats I.e. slow flow. He won't take medium flow.

My baby also never, ever takes a bottle from me but does with dad. Baby does need to be hungry but he takes it eventually. And I cannot be in the same room, he just turns around and stares at me like "wtf is this and when are you giving me milk ffs".

And we only ever do it with expressed milk. I haven't tried formula, is it formula that you are trying to feed him?

Thank you! This gives me hope!

Yes I'm expressing as figured that will be easier for her to take than the new taste of formula! X

Thanks all, just to add, if I can't get her on the bottle we will figure a solution out, I will absolutely not leave her for 12 hours hungry! It is just causing me a bit of anxiety trying to work out what to do!

What's your plan for expressing during the hen do? Have you got a portable pump?
Don't put yourself at risk of mastitis

I went to a hen do when DC1 was about 5 months. Just for about 7 or 8 hours. We spent weeks and weeks beforehand with me pumping and trying to get him to take a bottle. It was a huge pain in the arse really and distressing for all of us seeing him so upset.

And by the time I got back to him my breasts were ready to explode. It was a nice day out but I'm not sure it was worth all the hassle really and I'm afraid it took a lot more than 2 weeks for us to get him taking a bottle.

She won't take a bottle when she knows you are close by. You really need to go out for a couple hours and leave her with DH and a bottle so he can't just hand her to you, then gradually build it up. I think your DH is probably just hoping you won't go.

I have a little Hakka pump I can fit in a bag and just go to the loo for 5 mins every few hours to relieve the pressure!

I did my sister's hen do when baby #1 was 5mo, but he had been having the odd bottle of expressed. I stayed 24h rather than the whole weekend and pumped regularly - I recall vividly being in one bar where the barmaid allowed me to plug my pump in behind the bar and guarded the back room for me while I pumped in there. It worked fine and he had a lovely time with daddy, but it was a hassle.

Fingers crossed you can get the bottle working. My second was a stubborn little sod and wouldn't take it.

My baby started refusing the bottle.
I agree you need a faster-flow teat (you can always pace the feeding if it's too much for your DC).
Dip the teat in your breast milk, let baby play with the teat while snuggled up to you (or better, their dad).

A cup like the doidy cup would be a good back up.

Baby won't starve in 12 hours.

Oh, and your OH absolutely should be trying with the teat/bottle every day