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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Is it really possible to BF new dc whilst also amusing a toddler??

24 replies

mum2becks · 05/05/2008 20:32

I am currently expecting 2nd dc and dd will be 2.5yrs old when he/she is born. I really want to have a better go at bf this time round as I gave up after 6 weeks with dd and wished I hadnt.

I found it really difficult as although dd gained weight straight away and was doing well she wanted to be constantly fed and each feed could take up to an hour at a time so felt like all I was doing was BFing!! Then she started to only feed from 1 side and my mw didnt really offer an explaination so I had to start expressing from the other side and found the whole thing a nightmare so stopped after 6 weeks.

My concern is how will I manage when it takes so long if I have a toddler to amuse at the same time!!!

OP posts:

peanutbear · 05/05/2008 20:35

I bought book's and puzzles I could do with one hand and used to put cbeebies on or a favourite dvd

ComeOVeneer · 05/05/2008 20:35

I had a special bf box for dd when I was feeding ds. Favourite books, toys, a couple of dvds. We got it out, went to the toilet, got a drink and a snack, then settled down on the sofa, and feed, whilst I read to her, or cuddled and watched a dvd. I was very lucky in that dd never showed one ounce of jealousy towards ds and would quite happily hop down and go and play etc. Good luck.

mollymawk · 05/05/2008 20:36

I had DS2 when DS1 was nearly 2 and found that it was vital to try to be in a room with the door shut whilst feeding so I could keep an eye on DS1.
Also he was very keen on books so I just spent ages reading to him (upside down) and also found it was even possible to do puzzles upside down too.
But also accept any offers of help that you can!

Shitemum · 05/05/2008 20:36

TV!

Seriously, I found it a little harder the second time around as I could never just get on with it, was always having to jump up for whatever. At 2.5 yrs old your DD will be old enough to fetch a book for you to look at together as you feed, or play with something next to you on the sofa.

Good luck!

emkana · 05/05/2008 20:38

A ring sling absolutely essential IME, you can put the baby in there and feed him/her in there while still having both your hands free (sort of) to read, do puzzles, playdough, whatever. Also, the toddler "forgets" that the baby is there becasue he/she is tucked away out of view.

Ecmo · 05/05/2008 20:45

as soon as I sat down to bf ,my toddler would go and get her potty and sit on it in front of me and then announce what she'd done and demand that I emptied it!

notnowbernard · 05/05/2008 20:47

C-Beebies
C-beebies
C-beebies

Honestly!

justkeepswimming · 05/05/2008 20:49

Come and join us over here for more tips on 2 young LOs.

I have found that ds2 feeds much more quickly than ds1 did anyway. could be that i encourage him rather than the 'sit down with remote, phone, glass of water, biscuit tin, etc' approach i had with ds1,

we got ds1 a kitchen before ds2 arrived and he makes me endless cups of tea! plus something to eat, plus a plate, plus cutlery, etc.
so i keep him busy in other words.

good luck!

luckylady74 · 05/05/2008 20:57

New babies do sleep for a large proportion of the day though. I fed my twins when I had ds1 who was 2 at the time.
I fed first before dh left for work,
then a quick one before we left the house, out for 2 hrs,
got home put his lunch out so he ate whilst I fed them again.
Fed them later in the afternoon whilst he watched a video.
Fed them whilst he had tea.
Fed them when dh got home.
Admitedly I had help for the first 2 weeks from dh then my mother. I also used dummies. I also only ate standing up for weeks!
When I fed ds1 I can remember walking around and doing stuff at the same time. You can breast feed any where - play group/ park what ever. Today I have seen a mum feeding on the edge of a sandpit and another in the queue for a train ride - both had oother kids with them.You could certainly help with buiding blocks or painting - have faith in yourself.
Good luck.

Thomcat · 05/05/2008 21:04

It just works, honest, it does.

I'm bf a 7 month old and for months she fed every 2 hours 24 hours a day. I got mastitis, had cracked blistered nipples etc. I also have a 6 yr old with SN's and a 2 yr old. These new babies are very adaptable, at first anyway, and you can feed with one hand and still do a lot with the other. I've stirred stew while breastfeeding, had DD2 snuggled in the other arm reading to her, walked across playground breastfeeding and so on. Slings make it even easier in early days.

Thomcat · 05/05/2008 21:04

It just works, honest, it does.

calvemjoe · 05/05/2008 21:07

I sat on the floor playing lego with ds whilst feeding dd, tbh I did pretty much everything whilst feeding her. I found it more difficult when we switched to bottle as that took 2 hands whilst bf took only 1

notnowbernard · 05/05/2008 21:09

I echo the getting used to feeding anywhere scenario

Also found that with dd1 I probably did feed her at the first murmur, because I was able to

dd2 had to hang on bit, at times... yes, that meant she had to crank up the volume on occasion (couldn't just stop to feed when dd1 was waiting for her lunch, for example) but she survived!

pinkyminky · 05/05/2008 21:13

My DS was 17 months old when DD was born, it does work. Read her a book or let her play with her toys near you.
Mine have a play table and chairs next to mummy's chair in the playroom, and we would have tea parties and jigsaws. DD tended to have a big feed whilst we had our dinner (harringtton on her head to catch my spills!) and in the afternoon when DS had his nap- and after he went to bed- I think they suss out quite quickly when they can have a good feed, and when to grab a snack.
You will find you routines- it's a lot of trial and error, and thinking ahead for each move.
I'm expecting number three when DD will be 2, so it begins again!

Original poster

mum2becks · 06/05/2008 08:11

wow thanks everyone for such a positive response!! its obviously possible as you have all done it so I suppose its just being organised and get on with it!

I'm sure I will be back on here for lots more advise once the time comes x

OP posts:

TinkerbellesMum · 06/05/2008 10:46

I used to handsfree nurse in a wrap sling. I know people who sling say it's really helpful with a second baby because the older one can't see the baby so don't get jealous and it leaves your hands free for looking after DC1.

funnypeculiar · 06/05/2008 10:51

You'll be fine

I mostly read to ds - he'd choose a book & come & sit next to me (usually with a drink of his own) whilst I fed.

I was nervous about it (although it was actually fine) so briefed family & friends to look out for cheapo toys & wrap them up. They smuggled them into me without ds (older one) noticing - and hey presto, I had a magic present box. When I really needed to do something with dd & ds was looking iffy, I would find a reason to 'reward' him (tidied something up, 'looked after' dd for me, brought the wipes etc etc etc) - takes the average 2 yo about the length of a bf to unwrap a toy, work out what it does, play with it, get bored with it
I didn't have to use it much, but it made me worry less.

Bf wasn't a jealousy trigger point for dd (although he did hit her on the head with a flan case once when she was feeding....)

bobsyouruncle · 06/05/2008 10:53

My dd was very jealous of ds when he was born (she was 22 months), but she loved me feeding him as I made a point of chatting to her and giving her loads of attention when I was feeding. It was the thing I worried about most before he was born, and as it turned out it was one of the relatively easy aspects of having a second! Agree about cbeebies though

mrsruffallo · 06/05/2008 10:56

I had a big pile of books I used to read whilst bf dc2.
And also those instructions games they love- touch you toes!!
run around the room twice!
turn around three times!!
Find me three blue things!!

smallwhitecat · 06/05/2008 11:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster

mum2becks · 06/05/2008 12:04

i'm sure dd will be happy to read books, play etc but her attention span isnt very long so I will have to think of lots of different things to occupy her long enough to finish a feed.

A sling sounds like a good idea as that would free me up a bit more, are there certain ones that are good for bfing? i never had one with dd so not sure about them?

OP posts:

TinkerbellesMum · 06/05/2008 12:11

Most traditional slings (not modern baby carriers usually) can be breastfed in. I make my own wraps and they're great for nursing in, I like the wrap for being all round. Can't comment about others though as I've never used different ones.

kiskideesameanoldmother · 06/05/2008 12:16

this link shows an easy way to bf in a wrap like Tink said. Most people can do it with a (homemade) wrap that is 4.2m long. the hugabub/kari-me/moby wraps are all 5.2m which is designed for a newborn wrap style which uses more fabric.

claireybee · 06/05/2008 17:11

DD was 18 months when ds was born, she watched A LOT of cbeebies. She loves singing so we also used to go through our repertoire of nursery rhymes while I fed ds. It honestly hasn't been a problem at all, even though at almost 5 months ds is still feeding at least every 2 hours.

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