How can a two-week old be "taking the mick"???

[bearmama]

I had a very assertive midwife who taught me how to recognise when my DD was properly attached, however she described the noisy suckling as "taking the mick" and said I should get DD more firmly by the scruff of the neck against the breast.
When she demonstrated DD was perfectly happy, then when I tried it later DD was (of course) upset.
I'm more confident now and will gently detach her if she is not attached right but I think now it was the wrong approach for a new mum and it made me too rough with a little baby as i didnt have the confidence then.
I'm grateful for the midwife's help but it was a bit hard to take, being told that a newborn could be manipulative.
What do you think?

it is a newborn's job to be manipulative to ensure they get what they need.

Don't be wound up be terminology, is everything going OK now?

i think she meant well and was trying to help you get a good latch.
and i think the first two weeks of being a mum can be v fraught and sensitive time.

Thanks suzywong, that gives me back a bit of perspective.
NG, She did mean well, I liked her. I think it was just too much of a reality check at that point.
Things are going fine now, I am lucky that DD is quite a good feeder, only time she isnt is when she has wind and needs a good burp or fart!

Hi bearmama - weirdly (linking to my thread) the same person I have been moaning about has been complaining that her new born baby is 'taking the mickey' at night, by waking up hungry. I too find the terminology a little offensive. It's a new born baby - it's not taking the mickey - it's doing its job! It sounds like your midwife could definitely be a bit more sensitive.I'm off to knit some nappies and cook that placenta up now.

I imagine the way it was said was not to cause offence, I could quite easily say to my DS2 (!*days old) 'Come on matey you're taking the mickey now' if he didn';t latch on properly or something, I doubt she meant it.
Glad feeding is going well

aaargh things like that drive me mad poor you bearmama

it's like when people say "is she good"? well she's not BAD!!

all your weeny baby knows right now is if she is hungry/tired/content/windy...I think that's about their limit! Adults put adult perspectives/thought processes/capabilities onto babies all the time and it drives me bonkers.

The poor wee mite is only just realising that she exists for goodness sake.

Sorry, rant over, good luck with the bf-ing and if you think your latch is not quite right get some NICE help from NCT or similar!!

or what VS said....ooops think I'm in a bad mood today

lol velveteen, am sure you'll fine the recipe on earthmummy.com

VS - thanks, it was just her way, am sure. Also she had five DC's so had maybe forgotten what it was like to be a novice mum ?

caz10 - yes the terminology around babies is odd, isnt it? I do find myself saying "good girl" all the time tho!

I always tell my DD how good she is.

You know those people who believe in God and Heaven but not in the Devil and Hell? Well it's like that. I believe in good babies only

It's just a thing to say really while I'm chatting to her.

I also always ascribe adult motivations to my DD because it amuses me and so we can have more involved conversations. If all we had to talk about was sleep and digestion we'd soon get bored of each other.

lol thinking about it skidoodle i do that too...but only for the positive ones! it just drives me mad when people say things like "oh she's demanding attention" of a crying newborn baby - she's hungry ffs!!

Hi bearmama . Glad your DD is doing well. I do remember the midwives with DS1 while we were in hospital being really quite rough with him and I was at how rough they could be without damaging him. I really struggled to be so forceful with him.

I do, however, constantly tell my DTs that they are taking the mick or being cheeky (they are 16 weeks now), esp DD who really is much too cheeky for her own good . She thinks it is fun to scream and scream as though she has not eaten for days, and then when I go to feed her she just looks at me and grins and wont eat. Annoys the hell out of me but I can't help but smile back .

Hi Egg have posted pics of DD on profile but cant remember if they same ones as email (mummybrain alert!)

And Egg those pics on your profile are gorgeous!

Oh oh I am welling up. She is beautiful. I love the bottom one of you together (presume that is you!). Thanks for saying mine are gorgeous too . Got some new ones of DS1 I must put on.

Aw thanks! Yes that's us - the compulsive co-sleepers! Did you get my new email address? If not can you re-send yours to [email protected].
Look forward to seeing new pics. X