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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Interesting how everyone says MWs/HVs ram breastfeeding down new Mums throats (not literally!) - when I was in hospital with DD (first baby)

24 replies

MamaG · 30/04/2008 12:26

on the first night she was born, I was exhausted after extremely long labour and they put her in the nursery to let me sleep. I was BF and asked them to wake me when she woke for her feed.

Next morning I woke up panicking as I hadn't been woken up and the MW said I was so tired they couldn't bear to wake me, so they gave her a bottle of formula

OP posts:

Stefka · 30/04/2008 12:27

How did you feel about that? I would be furious. Should they not have had your permission first?

beansprout · 30/04/2008 12:27

They tried to do the same with ds but he wouldn't take it. I was livid!!

Original poster

MamaG · 30/04/2008 12:28

Well yes, I was very upset, but it was almost 9 years ago now so I'm over it

I just thought it was interesting that they took this approach, givne the way they usually deal with babies being fed

OP posts:

VictorianSqualor · 30/04/2008 12:36

With DS1 I had an ELCS, when I came to HDU after the op he was already there, just been dressed by a nurse who said she'd 'bring him over to me once he'd fed', I said he was being BF and she said he was hungry and needed food so she'd feed him and I could do it next time, obviously I was still numb from the spinal so couldnt get up and had to kick off to make her give me him.
Spoke to someone whose DD is 9 yesterday and she was telling me how the mw was telling her to give her DD a bottle because she hadn't fed when really she was probably just sleepy but as she was a new young, single mum she was petrified she was starving her so started on formula

Original poster

MamaG · 30/04/2008 12:40

Have to add, I did go on to successfully bf, its not like she was poisoned! I was young first time Mum too

OP posts:

AbricotsSecs · 30/04/2008 12:40

This reply has been deleted

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Disenchanted · 30/04/2008 12:43

Same here

With DS1 only 3 yrs old now, I was trying to breast feed, I was having major trouble with it on my first night at the hospital, i called the midwife several times and after about the 3rd time she said 'just give him a bottle if hes hungry'

and told me where to go and get one

so i did, i was 20 and sat feeding him a bottle, sobbing to myself.

WHich he then threw up and started crying again.

That was the worst night of my life

MamaChris · 30/04/2008 15:32

My ds was born full term (this year), but went to NICU bc he'd inhaled meconium. There, they tube fed him formula, despite me saying I wanted to bf. By this point, he'd been there 36 hours (on a glucose drip) and was breathing fine. They let me express, but topped it up (to ~30ml/3 hours, increasing each day) with formula - no way I could express close 30ml of colostrum! Felt awful, trying to establish bf with a baby that wouldn't latch because he was busy sleeping/vomiting after being force fed such large volumes of formula (made worse by tt they refused to check for). Minimal sleep for me too, bc each 3 hour cycle included 30 min expressing, 30 min tube feeding, nappy change, then trying to get him interested in latching

BouncingTurtle · 30/04/2008 15:48

MamaChris - that's crazy - you DON'T produce much colostrum volume wise, as it is very concentrated! I seem to remember from the BFing class that on the first day you only produce 7ml!
I was also told to give formula to ds when he was born, I was very strident about him not having it as I wanted to give bfing a go, in the end he was cup fed 15ml, on the suggestion of one of the midwives. The Paeditrician insisted I should bottle feed, fortunately, me DH and MW told him to feck off. DS is now 18 weeks old, exbf and doing well.
It's the same old story, they push bfing down your throat, then don't give you the support and give you crap advice. It's almost is if they are trying to make mothers think they have failed when they switch to ff. Which is stupid - they haven't!

kiskideesameanoldmother · 30/04/2008 15:52

It is considered assault if a midwife / nurse gives your child formula (or a medical test etc) without your expressed consent.

kiskideesameanoldmother · 30/04/2008 15:55

i get the impression sometimes that some midwives are gagging to be the first to feed a baby. i wonder if it is because they can sit there for 45 mins while they get the little thing to have 2oz and keep them off the paperwork/wards? or is it because they have the same irrational emotional need to feed someone else's baby.

ChasingButterflies · 30/04/2008 16:32

A friend of mine only discovered that her dd had been given a bottle of formula one night by a mw when she was discharged from the hospital and saw they'd put her down as "mixed feeding" when she was bf. She was terribly upset as she hadn't wanted this at all. Their defence was that she (the mum) had been asleep!
This was last year, in a big teaching hospital.

BouncingTurtle · 30/04/2008 17:05

I never slept when I was in the hospital except in very short bursts, luckily most of the MWs were keen not to give formula.
Very true Kisdidee, problem is when you are exhausted both physically and emotionally from the birth, it's hard to fight for your rights

canofworms · 30/04/2008 17:12

7 years ago my baby was tube fed formula and ebm as she wouldn't latch on and feed but I only had 1 midwife ask me if I really wanted to breastfeed They also tube fed her overnight in the nursery instead of waking me as I'd specifically asked.

Last year when dd3 was born I was advised by my midwife at 7 days to start formula - never gave it to her and am just stopping bfing 15 months later!

Mercy · 30/04/2008 17:19

canofworms, a similar thing happened with dd. I woke up to see her being wheeled back from the nursery with a tube up her nose. I have no idea what she was given.

I vaguely remember a Dr. waking me in the middle of the night and trying to explain how they were going to treat dd but I don't think I understood a word she was saying.

MamaChris · 30/04/2008 19:12

really kiskidees? I am still v that I wasn't given an option - they didn't ask my consent, just which brand of formula to use! Just glad I was determined to bf and lucky that a good bf counsellor visited me and gave me the confidence to keep latching him on from day 5, otherwise I'd have gone to ff, as I was told we couldn't go home till feeding was established. grr.

theUrbanNixie · 30/04/2008 19:24

When my friend had her baby she had a card that she put on the end of the cot saying "My daddy is a lawyer - I am a breastfed baby"

harpsichordcarrier · 30/04/2008 19:38

MamaG that is pretty common pratice still tbh..
common enough for me to suggest to new mums that if they don't want it to happen, they should put it in their birth plan
ime there is very commonly enormous pressure to ff from midwives, and in particular health visitors
not all of them, of course

2Happy · 30/04/2008 19:46

I didn't notice bfing being rammed down throats either time, but then I was always going to try to bf - and (with varying degrees of agony) succeded, so maybe it's just that any sensitivity towards the bfing message just wasn't there IYSWIM. If I'd wanted to bfeed and not been able to, for whatever reason, probably I would have noticed the ramming much more.

Mercy · 30/04/2008 19:52

Do midwives or doctors actually look at birth plans then?

I'm surpressing a hollow laugh at that tbh

harpsichordcarrier · 30/04/2008 19:53

lots of midwives do, yes.
especially if you point them out
in our county there is a space for them in the notes

Mercy · 30/04/2008 20:00

I remember writing a few bits and pieces in my notes but certainly don't recall talking to anyone other than dh about it. And it was more about the labour process tbh - iirc I said I wanted dimmed lighting or some such (I think I saw that in a magazine). Madness!!

WIth ds I didn't even bother tbh.

kiskideesameanoldmother · 01/05/2008 11:34

afaik, MamaChris, this is the case. so sorry you were treated so poorly. the knowledge of how bfing works can be so shit with so many whose daily job is to deal with babies.

Kathyis6incheshigh · 01/05/2008 11:45

Something a bit similar to MamaG....

My first night in hospital after dd was born I hadn't had any sleep for over 60 hours, couldn't get her to sleep, I had tried feeding her, the midwife on duty said 'Do you want me to nurse her at the desk so you can get some sleep?'
I assumed she just meant give her a cuddle, but I woke up 8 hours later and she was fast asleep in the nursery.
I didn't think about it at the time but I now believe it is very likely they gave her formula.

I know it is probably unethical, could interfere with bf getting established etc, but actually given my state of exhaustion I think she did the right thing. I was lucky and didn't have any trouble establishing bf - I might feel differently if it hadn't gone easily.
(Of course, the whole system is set up wrong, because in a sane world dh would have been there to take her while I had a nap and the beds would be big enough to let you co-sleep. One reason why home births are not a bad idea if possible....)

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