Urgent help please: need to discuss some stuff with people in the know

[StepByStep]

Hello everyone - I am a regular namechanger blah de blah

I need to know a step-by-step guide to changing bf to ff as quickly as possible for a RL friend.

She's been through a hell of a tough time - baby came after being raped and it's exceptionally traumatic to feed the baby.

I am trying to support her in changing from bf to ff but the baby is not taking well to the sudden change (as is expected, I guess).

My poor friend is in bits at the thought of feeding her dc again She just can't do it any more; it is physically impossible and instead of totally rejecting her baby, we are trying to think of other ways to get food in to them.

I know the dangers of just stopping but to be honest, I think we're going to have to risk it - could she express and dump to fake a slow withdrawal?

Would a bf counsillor be able to help? Or anyone?

HELP! please... if you recognise the story - do NOT say anything related to it please; very hurt people involved thank you

bump for you

have a look at hunker's blog, the four free breastfeeding helpline numbers are on there
sorry for your friend, what a terrible trauma

howbreastfeedingworks.com/tag/breastfeeding/

is ther anyone she trusts anough to take the baby for a couple of feeds???

I know in my change over's that mine would never feed from me if they could smell or sense me in any way!!!

oh, and if it is a sudden stop....she doea of course need to express herself to prevent mastitis!!

sending hugs for her......tis a tough tough time

I was advised by a children's nurse who was formerly a bfc to express small amounts as you indicate to fake a slow withdrawal, as she felt that there was less risk of mastitis than if I stopped cold turkey. Might be easier if you have the time if you or another adult could do some of the bottle feeds, so that the baby doesn't smell her mother's milk.

sorry to hear your friend is feeling so bad, I hope she has a sympathetic HV or GP she can speak to.

it may help baby if she expresses and gives some of the first bottle feeds using her milk as baby can get used to the bottle teat (and it is a different sucking skill getting used to teats after the breast) while having the 'normal' taste of milk.

then after, maybe mixing her milk with formula so it is mixing the tastes??? Not sure how well that could/would work but it is how I did it for mine getting them from me onto special formula's (they were milk/soya allergic)

yes, thanks everyone.

She's just managed to express a few ml of bm to try in the bottle...

I will suggest mixing bm and formula - didn't think of that.

Unfortunately, she's at the other end of the country so only in msn contact etc so I can't physically help (which is REALLY annoying)

Thanks everyone though

Good advice here, about gradually stopping.

But I don't agree with the idea to separate mother and baby. This idea of 'so she won't smell the milk' is one that doesn't wash with me! The baby's relationship with her mother by now is not based on smell. To separate mother and baby is to double the distress to them both. The baby has to get used to another food and food method - don't make her have to get used to another carer as well. Does not make sense.

The mum can feed the bottle lovingly and skin to skin if she wants.

Hope things go well.

oh goodness what an awfully traumatic situation.

I have read that taking some cold remedies (sudafed etc) has an ingredient that dries up milk, not sure if this is in fact true but she could try that if the move to FF is very rapid to help ease the engorgement.

Also, I have a bag of playtex bottles and teats that are supposed to be very good for reluctant bottle feeders - Im happy for her to have them if they would help at all.

I stand corrected Tiktok, thanks for giving better advice.

Total, glad you took it in good spirit!