24 hour weighing - lost again. What shall I do?

[AlienLady]

Midwife came yesterday - Day 5. DD lost 10% of her weight
Midwife came today and she lost a further 0.3g.
I have been trying to feed her every 3 hours since yesterday.
She seems sleepy today and not that bothered so I’ve had to strip her just to get her to take some milk. Midwife wanted me to give her a top of expressed milk so I got my haaka out and tried expressing for the first time. I got only 10ml out of my left breast. What do I do? It’s my birthday today as well and I am so upset as I thought I was doing a good job. Do I do a formula top up and how?

It is so hard OP. Please don't blame yourself for any of this. You can see what an amazing, caring mother you are by the steps you are taking to try and fix this. Be kind to yourself.

I had a similar experience with my DD (not tongue tie so can't comment on that bit specifically but lost too much weight and wasn't getting enough from BFing alone despite feeding all the time). I followed a lot of the advice you've been given - always offering both boobs, doing compressions when feeding, getting the latch/position checked etc. I expressed (using a pump not a hakka) and gave top ups after each feed. I always felt like I didn't get out as much as I'd hoped and so felt like I was constantly either BFing or expressing. It was really hard.

I got ill and just couldn't face expressing one day so we ended up giving some pre-made formula as the top up (we used Hipp and the little bottles that come with the tip for ease). It was a game changer. She absolutely loved it and although I was a bit sad she seemed to prefer it to my milk, it was a relief to have a bit of a break from pumping. From then on, I did a combo of BFing, some expressed top ups and some formula top ups. I mainly just expressed once a day at the time I generally got my best results (around 1am) but didn't stress if I didn't get much as I knew we had the formula if needed.

Even when she was eventually on track with her weight and we were told I could reduce the top ups, we decided to stick with them as it was working well for us and we liked the flexibility we got from combi feeding, but I did stop expressing and just stuck to formula after a certain point. I eventually ended up moving some whole feeds to formula and just keeping some as BF as it just worked out better for us.

I ended up BFing until DD turned 1. I never thought that would be possible at the start. I'm glad a stuck with it and felt I ending my BFing journey on my terms in the end when I was ready for it to stop, but with hindsight I wish I wouldn't have put so much pressure on myself with it. Fed is absolutely the best for our kids, in whatever way works for them and you. It is really hard but you will get there in the end, it might just take a bit of trial and error. Take care, OP, you got this x

I am trying to pace feed 30 ml of breast milk after she fell asleep on both my breast after 20 minutes with breast compressions.
Shed crying for more. She’s gulping it down. What do I do?

I'd feed her more. Sounds like the tongue tie means she is having to work very hard at the breast to feed and it is exhausting her.
I'd give more breastmilk by bottle if you have it, and if you're out of breastmilk give her formula.

She’s also become very alert as well.

I haven’t read the full thread of comments so not sure if it’s been suggested but if you need some support you could call the National breastfeeding helpline - 0300 100 0212. They are open at night and provided me with support on many an evening when I was desperate and health visitors etc were not available. They might be able to help guide you this evening and be a reassuring voice - I always found the evenings/nights so overwhelming. Best of luck OP, you’re doing brilliantly and your little one is so lucky to have such a caring, determined and loving mum.

OP if you’re near Brighouse I really recommend getting in touch with the health visitor as I’m not far from there and they were absolutely brilliant with me, not judgemental at all and have loads of help on trying to bf then helping me sort out my emotions when I decided to stop trying.

If she’s drunk all the formula and wants more I would give it, it might help you BF as she’ll be strong enough to feed.

i am now able to get about 50 ml x 2 so far of breast milk with a manual pump.
it seems like 20 minutes each breast with pumping for a top up is the plan. Hopefully this works for some weight gain…

Am I more likely to get a weight gain with breast milk or formula?

I live in Huddersfield. I may consider it if I feel like this plan isn’t sustainable.

You'll get weight gain with both OP. The most important thing is that she gets milk into her and gains weight at this stage. If she cries for more then give her more. As she gets calories into her she will gradually become more alert. Sounds like things are improving, well done.

OP I’ve sent you a PM but sounds like you’re doing well now!

In all honesty I wouldnt worry til baby is. 2 weeks. I come from a long line of breastfeeders and many of the babies lose weight in the first 2 weeks. It's not a big concern if baby is having wet nappies.

This is supposed to happen and is very normal.

Agree with other posters. Move on to formula top ups so baby is gaining, keep bf - you can get back to EBF once baby is gaining. It's a transition but it can be done. I did it! I think she was EBF by 4 weeks old.

Make sure you're doing breast compressions throughout every breastfeed too. And change a nappy to wake baby after offering first breast so they have a good stab at the second.

Breast milk is more calorific

But obviously if you've ran out of BM use formula until LO is full :-)

So she’s happy taking the 30ml of extra milk. Do I give her more? I don’t want her to be sick.

If you are pace feeding (feeding with baby upright not laid down and pouring it in) I think you’ll find she won’t take anymore if she’s full. My DS turned his head when he had enough. You could give her a few mins break then try again to see if she’ll take more. I think it will be obvious if she doesn’t want it.

When my DS was about 5 days old he had a night when he just screamed all night long. I told the midwife and she said he was probably hungry and to just offer a bottle every time he seemed unsettled, so we did. I think their stomachs grow really fast at this age.

I’m starting to think I should switch to formula.
I tried to wake her twice for a feed during the night and she’s fallen asleep twice but seems full from her top ups earlier and has slept in her Snuzpod for the first time.
My DS was formula fed because of tongue tie as well but he didn’t even get colostrum. He doing really well at school (one of top readers, top in maths etc), really good eater. Not fussy etc. No one would know he was formula fed. He had a lot of illnesses when he was younger but who knows if that was because of formula or just bad luck.
My reasons for breastfeeding is for ease too but it doesn’t seem to working for DD. Shouldn’t I be prioritising her health now?
this is affecting my moods which is affecting DH and DS.
I really wanted to breastfeed but am I being selfish?
I may try introduce a bottle first tomorrow and see how we go. All my DH nieces and nephews were tongue tied and formula and all turned out okay. He doesn’t seem why I am so pro breastfeeding.

@AlienLady I started This thread recently- we’re a bit further ahead than you but my baby has still not regained her birth weight at nearly 4 weeks and it’s one of the most stressful things I’ve ever gone through.

What it’s taught me is not to be precious about breast feeding - I just need to get calories in my child. I always offer boob first but she gets a bottle every feed now and if she’s still hungry then she gets more.

We have another weigh in today and I really hope she’s finally gained!

My DS who is now 6 said are you in a bad mood because of the new baby? It broke my heart

I got 5 ml of pumped milk last night which is so disheartening.
shes fed fine this morning and seems more alert.
ideal situation for me now is to combi feed.
I am thinking of introducing one morning bottle of formula until the tongue tie. Pump and top up during the other feeds. At least that gives me a piece of mind and maybe eventually introduce an evening bottle so my DS and DH can get involved too and the rest breast milk. If she ends up preferring a bottle so be it I suppose? I don’t know what else to do that’s not making me miserable. Formula made me miserable but this is now too. At least formula my child gets weight gain.

Thank you for this. I will have a read. Nice to know that I am not alone.

Instead of going to sleep. I spend hours and hours trawling the internet.

Would giving one before bed not affect your supply at night if he doesn’t wake and is when you should be breastfeeding? Or has it just worked for you?