Am I worrying unecessarily? Ds won't feed properly in the afternoon... long and rambling post. Tiktok if you can bear to read and advise I'd be grateful!

[chunkypudding]

And now seems to be waking more to feed at night, I'm hoping that this too will pass...

I can handle waking up more, he's fairly good at going back once he's had a feed and definitely is hungry when he wakes - its not just a comfort or resettling thing as he has a decent feed and is also okay at self-settling at night.

However he won't go for more than 4 hours without a feed at night now which is a big change, but will go for anything from 5 to 7 hours in the day without a proper feed, I end up feeling like I'm trying to force-feed him although he shows some initial interest...

He's 14 weeks and suffering with early teething (can see and feel one coming thru, don't know if it actually will this early) which affects his feeding, and has also recently become really interested in all that is going on, which as I saw on another thread can really bugger up daytime feeds...

So I think I understand what's happening - but I still get really worried when he doesn't eat for long stretches - can someone advise me of a rough idea how much he should be feeding in 24 hours? and if some feeds are an hour long and both sides, does it make sense that others could just be a 5-10 min quickie and he'll still be getting enough?

Also on a slightly selfish note, any ideas how to get him to feed in the afternoon rather than at night? Or do I just wait it out?

Sorry for the long post finding it impossible to be concise I'm knackered!

ta swc...

yeah mani was managing longer periods at night before and seemed fine - somehow that didn't seem so weird.

at the moment can't get him to have a 'proper' afternoon feed even if i take him off to our bedroom with no telly, or even mn!

poos and wees are frequent (poos are very frequent actually!) so i guess he's ok, things just seem really weird at the mo and its hard when he is unhappy on the boob.

regarding length of feeds, just not sure if there's normally such drastic variations in the same baby~? ie 1 hr feed, then next only 5 or 10 thrashy minutes~~?

bumping for any further advice as i'm getting a bit stressed about this - haven't had a good feed since 10am though he has had the odd bit when offered - mostly keen when offered then pulls away after playing silly buggers for a bit and won't go back on...

he doesn't seem hungry so i'm maybe daft to worry~?

he's always been such a hungry little fella this just feels weird.

also my nipples are being treated like chewy toys - the teething maybe~?

Sorry, chunky, happy to help but unsure as to what the issue is here.

If you are saying can a baby get what he needs in feeds lasting no more than 5-10 mins, then the answer is 'yes, of course' - why not? And that at other times, he has a leisurely feed lasting an hour? Yes - of course!

It's not a good idea to try to force a baby to bf, or to struggle in any way against him - a healthy, thriving baby will take what he needs. Initiating a struggle can make a baby fight back in the only way he knows - refusing to feed at all.

Your definition of a 'proper feed' is based on a false notion, I think, that there is some sort of minimum below which the baby should not go.

Sorry if I have not understood the concern, but hope this has helped!

yeah in a way I'm unsure what I'm trying to say myself!

Its just a real change for him I guess. I don't try and force him, just try and offer him a feed if he's gone for more than 3-4 hrs as he's always been keen until now!

He does usually start off enthusiastically (god can't spell now) but then seems thrashy and pulls off - not like he's satisfied tho..

I think if it was just that he was having short feeds I wouldn't question it, its more the nature of feed...

i will try and chill out.

thanks x

Chunkypudding, my 17wo has started doing similar things - very little afternoon feeding and very short morning feeds too, whereas up until recently, she was having 6 - 7 decent feeds a day. Partly it might be that I'm now more aware than ever of whether she's actually feeding and pull her off to start again if she's just daydreaming (otherwise it was common for her pre-bedtime feed to last an hour and a quarter). But I'm wondering whether she's just suddenly become a more efficient feeder?? Or whether this is just a phase? Or whether she is just too interested in playing?!

Hi bluegrey...

I'm convinced that my ds is not more effient at feeding as he doesn't have that 'satisfied' thing after these feeds, he always seems to pull away either because he's distracted by something or because his gums are hurting...

its really frustrating at the moment - of course I wouldn't dream of 'forcing' him to feed but I do have to keep offering... and I never really know what he's going to do at the moment!

he always feeds really really well before bed (know what you mean about 1hr+ feeds, I just let him do that if he wants!) and usually has a couple of decent feeds in the day - is definitely no longer getting as much as he needs in the daytime as his night time feeds have become more frequent, and longer [totally knackered emoticon]

also, the shape of our days seems to have fallen apart and any (baby led I hasten to add) structure that we seemed to have been kind of getting to our days has gone out the blooming window.

feel like I've got no idea what's needed when at the mo. Could be cos I'm soooo tired...

god what a bloody ramble, sorry. Does your dd wake more at night now bluegrey?

I saw a good link on here somewhere to a page on kellymom saying it's common for 4 month olds to start feeding less well in the day due to general excitement at their surroundings...

this would be easier if I had some idea how long it will go on for, but of course I don't

yawn

just realised smallwhitecat that your lo is 12 weeks - you may have all this just around the corner - at 12 weeks I think my ds was in a similar pattern to your lo, I was so chuffed as I thought things were all falling into place!

(fingers crossed that you don't have this round the corner obviously. I'm not mean or anything!)