Really need help - 1 week old BF

[Charlottef94]

I had a wonderful baby boy a week ago but am really struggling with BF and am also concerned this is not normal.

since the beginning he has been cluster feeding daily but yesterday he did this from around 12pm up until 1.30am this morning at which point he was screaming hysterically, my breasts had nothing more to give him, and we had to give him a bottle of 60ml formula which he drank and then passed out until 5am, still sleeping peacefully now.

When he is cluster feeding he is never satisfied, doesn’t nap for hours on end, only cries, can’t be held by anyone other than me or cuddled by me, all he wants is the breast.

I know this part is normal, however I feel like it’s not normal that he’s cluster feeding for these huge durations (meaning 20_+ feeds in 24 hours).it’s also having a real impact on my ability to eat, sleep, do anything and getting sore.

Hes having regular wet and dirty nappies as per the guidelines.

im not sure im producing enough for him.

Dont really feel like I have any support to help us know if this is normal as PP support from midwife where I am has been pretty poor.

Just bumping this for you op as it does sound excessive- you could try a local lactation volunteer like la leche league for advice

Well done for trying to help your new little one, when they are trying to establish feeding and supply it can be really difficult.
I'd try and drink as much water as you can to make sure you are producing as much milk as your little one needs,
Are there any local breastfeeding support drop in / cafe / centres you can go to for help and advice? In person is often the most helpful as you can discuss all the issues you are having and get specific advice. You could try asking on your local mum group to find one or possibly also your local council family health website or google?
Best of luck, keep asking if the answers don't sound right or aren't helpful, often it can take time to work out what exactly is going on. Both of my children have CMPA and my first had reflux which meant they fed continuously for months

Also a really helpful Facebook group is 'breastfeeding younger babies and beyond' I found some useful early feeding support and advice there

How is his weight? My DS2 was like this for the first few days, we thought it was normal as he was producing enough wet and dirty nappies but when he was weighed he had lost too much and it turned out he wasn't transferring milk effectively due to a tongue tie. I'd definitely try to talk to a breastfeeding specialist in case there is an issue like this or perhaps some tweaks to the latch that could help.

Ask your HV to come out and assess a breastfeed, I know is they're due soon anyway, they won't mind an early visit to help you.

Yea clustering can look like this. Even in the day/every hour. Does sound like he needs a deep latch, chin massaging those milk ducts, staying on your breast right past falling asleep (don't de-latch unless uncomfortable before re-latching). How long is he feeding for? Have you tried breast compressions?

Is there a lactation consultant where you live/attached to your hospital?

Please look after yourself, drink, eat, get that shower, you're doing amazing but look after you too.

@Charlottef94 my first was like that and it turned out to be Tongue Tiee*.

It could be at the extreme end of being normal but is sounds as though it's worth reading that article on T T to see if anything is similar

It's very, very unlikely that you're not producing enough milk. If there is a problem it's usually the baby's ability to transfer the milk rather than your ability to produce it.

Have you spoken to one of the BFing Helplines yet? A BFC should be able to talk you through how you're feeling and give you an indication of whether what you're experiencing is normal.

Also agree with drinking and eating plenty. Your DH/DPs function at this point is mainly to look after you do that you can look after LO.

If you have fed him and DH/DP has changed him, will LO settle if he takes them out for a walk, so that you can either have a little nap or a shower?

Feeding every hour / almost continuously for long stretches was normal in my experience. As was being very fussy on the breast during long cluster feeding sessions. And my son also had an tonge tie - we didn’t snip it and it did not impede his breastfeeding. He just took longer than other babies to get the hang of feeding, but we got there. Establishing breastfeeding is just difficult but if you want to do it then get some local support in if you feel you need it.

well done for getting this far!

Another one saying get him checked for tounge tie. 2 of mine had it and presented very differently. One was very obvious and the other wasn't. Once they were cut everything improved literally on the next feed

There's a lady on Facebook I think it's Katherine stagg who has great advice as well

Best of luck x

That sounds very difficult. Are you able to access breastfeeding support in your area? I was able to see the infant feeding team through my local family hub and they supported me through a tongue tie division.
Your HV may be able to point you in the right direction.

That sounds pretty normal OP, although that doesn't make it any easier. I remember this with my first and it was really hard.

Others have already suggested checking weight gain and other health issues.

Tips that work for me- pop the baby in a sling and keep breastfeeding with him in there. It might take a few weeks before he's big enough to manage it. Then you can at least make yourself some food and walk about the house like that. I also (safe sleep seven) cosleep with mine and when I think he's swapped from being hungry to just comfort drinking (half asleep, stopped really swallowing) I just go to sleep and leave him to it. Usually we both wake up a few hours later for another proper feed and start again from the top

My baby also did a few 12 hour cluster feeds between days 3 and 10. Latch was fine, no tongue tie. Midwife said that yeah, some babies do that. 6 weeks on breastfeeding is totally fine so it does get better.

Hugs, it's really tough. I hit a massive mental block around day 10. Had a massive breakdown. But it gets better, quite quickly.

Keep going mama! It will get easier. As PP have said get the tongue tie checked. I was always given the advise to NOT supplement with formula. Babies cluster feeding is them 'putting in tomorrows food order'. If you stop this process, tomorrow they won't have the milk they were demanding today. It can be gruelling but the little one will be suckling you, to tell your body they want more tomorrow. In a few weeks it WILL settle 😘😘😘. You can do this xxx

It's also important to know sometimes when sucking they aren't doing it for food, you are their comfort and the original pacifier, your little one just wants to feel super close to their mama ♥️