Breastfeeding distress

[NewmumIVFanxious]

Longtime reader first time posting. My baby is 13 weeks old and for the first 7 weeks he fed beautifully- 20 minutes each feed, both breast, lovely latch, fed to sleep with a longer feed and fed overnight.
since 7 weeks his feeding has got increasingly fussy but only during the day and only for some feeds (although it is now almost every feed). It coincided with it being hotter so initially we thought it was that, but it also happens on cooler days. Also seemed to be displaying mild symptoms of silent reflux (hiccups, coughing, appearing to burp then swallow) but these vary in appearance and are not always present. Possibility he is teething and he keeps chewing everything and is a bit dribbly.
when he is fussing he feeds for 3-6 mins then goes on and off, screams, arches back, goes red, kicks legs. But still appears hungry. Equally will instantly calm if sat back up - even smiles and chats.
he had a week of weird green poos but they have gone back to normal now.
He is putting on weight and tracking his growth curve, nappy numbers are good.

Everyone (doctor, nurse, ILBC and my husband/family) tell me not to worry as he is happy, growing and content, but mum instinct tells me something else is going on and I should be worried. I feel so anxious but also rejected and like I’m hurting him when I try to feed him. He never fusses when he is asleep or sleepy. I have tried different positions (weirdly he feeds better if I stand up), sought support from GP (who prescribed gaviscon but said only use if really needed as gives constipation so I have avoided as he is feeding just short/a night) I LBC and La Leche who all tell me I am doing the right thing. I have also given up dairy in case that is it (but have been told he would fuss at night if that was the case) But I just need answers, I need to know the reason for this distress, I need a solution.

Has anyone else experienced anything like this? Anyone able to provide suggestions or who I could approach next for support.

I can feel it starting to affect my relationship with my gorgeous miracle baby.

any help or words of advice gratefully received!

Constipation from gaviscon is more common for formula fed as breastmilk is a natural laxative. It would be worth trying maybe 2 or 3 doses a day. More than that might make the poos a bit thicker. Also you don't have to express to administer it, just mix it with a teaspoon of boiled water and allow to cool. Give with a syringe.

The fact that it's not all the time means it's likely something in your diet affecting your milk. Dairy would likely be a problem at night too because it stays in your body for longer. But most other foods are in and out of your milk within a few hours.

I suggest keeping a food diary and noting down baby's symptoms.

Sounds a bit like reflux. Not a lot you can do apart from keeping them upright as much as possible. I think 3 months is the peak of it and by 6 months they start to grow out of it and solids help.

Another possibility is painful trapped wind for which I swear by Gripe Water!

My reflux baby also had the weird green poo. Tried all sorts. It ended up being a sensitively to garlic that seemed to come through in the milk. Food diary may help identify triggers.

Green poos and mucusy poos are a sign of diary intolerance - if you have given up diary I would also suggest giving up soy as the proteins are v similar - you should be militant about this, soy is in everything so check ingredients- if it is cmpa you should see improvements v quickly

If you aren't anti medication you could ask for omeprazole which is the next stage on from gaviscon, that should relieve the reflux (doesn't stop it but neutralises the acid so it doesn't hurt - I think I'm not a doctor)

Do you have a fast let down / lot of milk? Sometimes if baby is gulping down lots of milk and taking air it can cause these symptoms

Could it be that as they become more aware they are looking around more and getting distracted (this feels less likely at this age) but could try feeding in a calm room etc.

It isn't thrush? And your latch has been checked and you're happy? Does sound like extra air at least and maybe some other things going on. Will baby feed upright? That was super helpful for my first to keep milk in the right direction

Oh also, your right to want to get to the bottom of it - all of the professionals will be happy if baby is feeding and growing but you know your baby and you know if they aren't happy.

If this is happening every feed it is not that baby is trying to build your supply so it must be something else

Last thing - if you want a quick way to see if it could be food you are eating affecting baby you could Google the reflux causing foods in breast milk and give them all up (things like tomatoes, onions, milk, egg, coffee, chocolate, gassy veg, citrus fruit etc) and then see if there is an improvement - again this should be very quick. You can then introduce whatever food you are missing most for a couple of days and see if it makes baby uncomfortable. Or if you are happy avoiding foods and it helps you can stay like that for a while,

Shel Banks is the expert in this area if you wanted to look her up, she belongs to some Facebook groups where she also answers questions for free which gives helpful insight

He feeds for 3-6 mins then goes on and off, screams, arches back, goes red, kicks legs

Are you burping him when he does this? Or preferably before. Look at YouTube videos of magic baby burp.

My two were both very windy and burpy. In our case they just didn’t latch very well so were taking in a lot of air while feeding. Just had to do a lot of burping.

Thanks everyone - I will try all the suggestions @SplishSplashSploshes food diary sounds like a good place to start to see if there are any obvious patterns.
@catsnore we did wonder about the garlic thing and have mostly cut it out but will be more strict on it. Yes he burps during and after most feeds with very little effort.
@Alwaystired2023 have tried upright but he isn’t a fan. Will try gaviscon before trying other meds, didn’t want to due to idea of constipation. Don’t think it is thrush as no signs of that (he has a slightly white tongue but I think that is milky tongue) How do I tell if I have a fast let down? Is this something a professional would be able to tell me?
last night we fed in dark room with white noise and after 30 mins that eventually worked so could be distractions maybe he doesn’t want to miss out.
Thanks everyone. I just get so upset when he cries about it.

Honestly I was so anxious with my daughter I spent so much time trying to figure out why she behaved a certain way and often never did but she would one day stop doing it. We EBF like you. And I felt like I was failing her that I didn't know.

She's 3 now, super healthy and confident and just perfection, I'm pregnant and thinking I don't think I'll have any more of a clue this time round either.

For what it's worth it sounds like you're doing everything you can for him, with the dairy I would only cut it out for a few weeks and if you see no changes introduce it back in. It could end up doing more harm than good cutting it out, or at least that's what my doctor told me when my daughter started reacting to diary when we were weaning.

@RedRobyn2021 thanks so much, how long did the fussiness last for your daughter? Yes will bear in mind the dairy and not give it up for too long if I don’t see a difference.

Also from my own experience (similar, lots of allergies and reflux) everything got a lot better when they started eating actual food and moving about by themselves. When your in the thick of it it's hell and then suddenly you have a happy baby!

Yes except it started at 1 week being fussy with the 3 am feed. Over time she got more fussy and by 10 weeks she was impossible to feed. It was due to severe silent reflux and multiple food allergies. She also had mild physical reflux and the GP was only treating this and ignoring the silent reflux and had poor knowledge of allergies in breastfed babies (paediatricians opinion not mine). We saw a paediatrician for something else at 17 weeks and he set us on the right treatment for the reflux and me on the dairy and soya free diet.

@Superscientist sorry If this is a stupid question but how did you get to see the paediatrician rather than your GP?

@NewmumIVFanxious with great difficulty. Paeds kept rejecting referrals as he was gaining weight ok - following 9th percentile although once allergies and reflux were sorted she moved to the 25-50th.
Luckily/unluckily she and a reaction to her 4 month vaccines and after 1hv and 3 GP appointments in 8h we were sent to the paeds assessment unit to be checked over. The paediatrician reviewed her reflux at the same time and suggested it was worth trialling dairy and soya free. He then agreed to take her on as an outpatient and we have seen him since. She's now 4.