Goodbits: my method, is NO WHERE near as harsh as the 'traditional' CCmethod! I didn't see it as that at all. in most of the CC methods you read, you are not 'allowed' to give eye contact, talk, or anything, or pick them up. I could never do that! ever!
I'm sure you didn't mean to, but you make it sound like I did something really barbaric, ( slightly upset by it tbh ) when infact, in comparison, it was incredibly gentle. Also, whilst actually doing it, it didn't feel as bad as I thought it would. at all in fact. It felt like a really positive thing. I was seeing results immediatly almost.
Izzy was fine, all she wanted really was to see me ad have a cuddle, which she got. The only thing I deprived her of was a breast feed. I think it would work just as well if you went in after 30 seconds the first time... its the fact you are appearing, you are making lots of nice contact which at her age, is all she really wanted. She didn't need or want anythig else.
This is not meant in a horrible way at all , but are you honestly telling me your DC never cries? That you never allow them to cry? I find that really difficult to accept.( I really don't mean that in a nasty way truly ) Izzy cries, regularly in the day time, some times, I've not a clue what about. She doesn't want anything I do for her, so I usually give up trying to work it out. so She just sits crying, or potters around doing things, but crying on and off. Usually means she's tired or getting close to lunch time. sometimes neither though.
You know, like my mum and sister and SIL and many other mums who'd been there and done it, said to me. it is ok, for a child to cry. Especially if you know there is no actual reason, or one which you are not going to give into, such as br feeding, when they might want it, but certainly don't need it.
Anyway, like I say, it didn't feel horrible at all. it felt like I was finally gaining control of the situation which was driving me to insanity through total utter exhaustion. something had to be done. I'd tried a few things with little change. The title Controlled Crying is a horrible one anyway, certainly for this, as it is more about controlling me, than her. Well thats what it felt like anyway.
It was hard, of course it not nice to hear your LO cry. really hard, made my boobs leak- which did not help matters as she could clearly smell it even more! but, like I say, it was a very short term disruption for a hugely long term gain. I'd actually say, it changed out relationship in a way I was not expecting.
She has become far happier, as she is also getting proper sleep. She also started to sleep regularly i the day time, something she'd never done. Our routine and lives changed in a good way. Anyway if not for you, then thats fine I wont mention it again.