My body is failing me and my milk is no longer enough. Feeling really glum :0(

[lackaDAISYcal]

DD, 10 mo has been pretty much exclusively BF for the first 8.5 months of her life (apart from the odd bottle of ebm or formula now and again). Recently I started introducing more formula feeds after I found out I was pregnant and feeding her became very painful.

Over the last week or so, she was pretty much down to one, sometimes two BFs a day, usually at night if she woke and first thing in the morning and perhaps the odd swift one in the day if we were out and about as I keep forgetting to take bottles out with me!

At the end of last week, she had a really poorly tummy and diahorrea, so on Satuday I switched back to just BFing her to give her tum a chance to recover. She has been having 5 or 6 30mins plus feeds a day.

she has been really miserable, flat and listless since the weekend, lying with her head on the floor and just cuddling in since the weekend and we thought it was just the tummpy bug, but yesterday and last night she just wouldn't stop crying. anyway, I fed her this morning (40mins and she came off herself as usual) at 6:30, then we had breakfast at 7:45 and she ate a weetabix with cows milk, but was still crying. I was tidying away her bottles and she saw one and started howling and saying "mo", her word for more. I made up a 5oz bottle and she drank it in 3 mins flat and was still shouting more. she took another couple of ozs and is a changed baby; back to the happy smiley thing she normally is.

I'm now thinking that I've been starving her and that my milk just isn't doing it for her anymore. I'm 12 weeks pregnant, but still seem to be producing milk, although I don't feel the same let down aftr she latches on as I used to.

I'm struggling with depression at the minute and this is just the last straw. I feel awful for putting her to bed and letting her cry it out when she was actually just hungry. I feel like the worst mum in the world

Is my being pregnant a factor as I'd read that your milk can dry up, but I thought that wouldn't happen until later in the pregnancy.

Probably not a lot anyone can say, but I just needed to get that off my chest, so to speak.

Sounds like you need a hug Daisy.

If it helps, I think that you did absolutely the right thing. Dairy can irritate during/after a stomach bug, whereas breastmilk is just perfect for getting a child back to full health.

I'm sure she wouldn't have sucked at the breast for so long if she wasn't getting anything.

Milk can dry up at any point during pregnancy, so it is possible that there's less, but if she wants to suck it may well be for comfort as well as sustainance.

where you have not fed she may need to retrieve the hind milk again, if you want to continue try expressing for a day or two see if it comes back through, if not take comfort in the fact you have managed for so long she is now independent ready for the baby and give yourself a break till baby comes you have done her no harm you are a good person she may have just wanted a drink with an upset tummy which sounds like she was happy with foremilk

thanks...weak and watery

I just don't trust my body to do it's thing now. It doesn't help that she isn't really asking for a BF, whereas before she would let me know quite emphatically. I'm also wondering if the reason she is sucking so long is that it's just not satisfying her any more? She comes off herself though, but then just cries?

I am by no means an expert, there are 10 years between my babies, but I do know someone else who's milk seemed to dry up fairly early on in pregnancy.

You really aren't the worst Mum in the world, we all make mistakes at times. It is so hard to work out what they are after when they have virtually no words... we are not mind readers, unfortunately!

oh dear, come and have a manly pat on the back and a congratulate for doing sooo well so far. Bf in pg can be difficult, and supply can drop, also qite early on. look here

You have a lot on your plate. You have a still very young child, are pregnant, bf and struggling with depression. Be kind to yourself, and don't feel bad. It may be that your drop in supply will make bf difficult, but your milk is unlikely to go away entirely - you can keep feeding her.

Daisy, don't beat yourself up over this. It could be that she only really got her appetite back this morning. IME when they've had a bug or whatever that stops them eating they really compensate for it in the days after.

You have done really well with the bf, it's up to you now whether to continue or not.

thanks so much. I've had a good cry and a chat to my DDH, who is away in the week so doubly difficult here at the best of times and feel much better. I only had four hours sleep last night which isn't helping either and my 5 yo DS is being....challenging too.

DH has convinced me that I'm not starving her.

I just wish I knew what I was doing. excl BFing was fine, I know excl bottles will be fine too; it's this mixed feeding that is causing me problems. Add to that the hormones and the depression and I feel like a mad woman.

She's still not 100% bless her, but we'll get there.

berolina, how are you this morning?

aww daisy

this happened to me both times also, though my dcs were older

can you get hold of a lactation consultant? I did end up giving up both times but coming on here I realise I possibly didn't need to.

thanks spunik, I hadn't considered that in my sleep deprived depressed fug. She did have two huge bowls of soup for tea last night so her appetite is better as you say.

My CMW is fab on BFing issues fillyjonk and we already had a chat about carrying on with it, so I might give her a call....or she is the resident expert at the local baby cafe on Thursday so I'll pop along there and have a chat.

I really don't want to give it up completely; I just didn't realise how hard it would get when pregnant.

She's sleeping now so we're off to bed for a cuddle and a snooze. Thanks lovelies

maybe her tum still isn't right she's slept for three hours and then had the worst, the very worst nappy I've ever seen (not good when you are 12 weeks pregnant I can tell you )

but, I slept for an hour and a half and feel much more with the world now. I think I should steer clear of the dairy, but if my milk isn't enough?.........

nobody said it was easy, but no-one ever said it would be this hard