Should I give up bf 11 week old?

[rubyblue]

Would appreciate some advice. DS is 11 weeks old and 11lbs 4. He was gaining 6oz a week but that has now tailed off a bit and I'm worried he is hungry as he has reflux (so sicks up a lot of feed) and continues to wake frequently during the night - sometimes hourly. He thrashes around a lot when feeding and I don't seem to be producing enough milk for him. I'm knackered and very stressed thinking that he is not getting enough food and on the brink of giving up bf. DH wants me to give up for my sanity and in the hope that things improve for DS all round.
Any advice? Will he gain more weight with ff? Does it help to fill babies up so they sleep better or is that a myth? I feel very sad about giving up bf but if the benefits to all of us outweigh the negatives, I would do it. Is there anything I can do to increase my milk - just keep feeding him - but then it's so exhausting!

6 oz a week is very good weight gain. what was his birht weight?

it is normal for their weight gain to tail off around this time.

you say it is reflux but I am not so sure myself about this diagnosis.

it is normal for babies to wake alot - i know that is not comforting to hear - it is just that it is not what we are used to adn what society expects from babies.

i don't think weight gain will be better on formula. ff babies may sleep 'better' because so much of their blook is diverted to their GI tract for so long to cope with trying to digest something that is harder for them to digest than bm.

have you ever gone to a breastfeeding support group? one that is run by the NCT, LLL, BabyCafe, etc are very good for answering the questions you have and seeing mums with babies older and younger than yours will help you understand better what is normal for a breastfed baby. many times, if your family is only used to seeing ff babies, their expectations can be 'all wrong' for a bf one and without deliberately undermining what you are trying to achieve, it does happen.

about the exhaustion, are you feeding while lying down -day and night time helps a lot with the exhaustion.

Poor you - it can be exhausting, can't it?

I would really stress, though, that ff offers absolutely no guarantees of anything - not that he will gain more weight, not that he will sleep better.

6oz/week is a great gain, and it can be that he is going through a period of slower growth now - which is fine. Your milk supply is likely to be fine.

Can you co-sleep? It really helps improve the amount and quality of sleep you get, and a bf mother will tend to be aware of and responsive to her baby even in sleep, so that smothering or similar is very unlikely. The Unicef Baby Friendly campaign has guidelines to safe co-sleeping.

What, if anything, is happening about the reflux?

I would urge you to hang on in there and be proud, very proud, of yourself.

No it's not true ff fed babies sleep through better, sometimes it helps but not always, just depends on the baby. The thing you can do to increase milk is to feed as much as possible, could your dh do everything else for a few days whilst you just concentrate on the feeding? Best to have as much skin to skin contact as poss with baby and just feed on demand. My ds's weight gain slowed down and was a worrying time, still not that fantastic but he's happy and healthy. I have ex bf, mix fed and now from 5 months am ffing but i'd give anything to be able to go back to when I gave up bf for 5 days then started again and stop myself an get help so ds might still be bfing today. Ds started to prefer the ease of the bottle and bf less and less . One thing is that his weight gain was no different on bf to what it is ffing. Breast milk has more calories than formula. Is lo happy? Alert? Having plenty wet and pooey nappies? These are the main things to look for as indicators of good health. My dh was the same, panicking ff would be better but in the end made no difference. Have faith in your body, it will produce the milk. I know it's hard when your tired but just do what you want iyswim. Of course if you don't want to bf thats fine and your chicoe too, just giving you the info I have picked up over the months off mn

i need to get up and go do some weeding in the garden. sciatica and flu much better now and dh has taken dd for a llloooong walk.

rubyblue - my DS is 12 weeks and has reflux and is bf. He also sicks upa lot and thrashes about while eating and only feeds for short periods. He is on ranitidine on prescription which seems to have helped quite a bit. His sleeping has vastly improved since he has been sleeping in with us, propped up on his side (on his back is just a disaster), using one of those little bolster thingies.

Also, bf is much better for reflux babies than formula, as it is easier to digest.

I just lost the message I wrote out. I won't re write it, but will just say that you are not alone and you are doing a great job. Try to keep going, it does get easier and I'm sure your supply is fine. My Dd put small amounts on and even lost weight, but we are still going strong at almost 16 months and she is healthy and growing well but, she still wakes in the night, though it's no longer every hour, it's usually just once a night.

Good luck.

Probably growth spurt. Hold on honey. It will improve.

could it be possible that what people are calling reflux may be confused with this? i am not saying it can't be reflux, i am saying that it is not be the only possibility.

i agree that if is reflux, bm is easier on their tums than formula.

kiskidee - I have that as well!

Thanks so much for advice and support. I've been getting a fair amount of pressure from mother who just cannot understand why I am breastfeeding when she thinks (wrongly) that formula would help him sleep through the night!
DS is on renitidine as well and it has made a real difference to his feeding but I'm wondering if we could decrease the dosage as I hate giving it to him and he seems better. one for the GP!
Generally he is a happy wee chap and is getting more alert by the week and happier when awake. In the early weeks he just seemed to cry all the time, including feeds.
I'm scared by growth spurt stories though! Hourly feeds again...

Feed him when he wants it, rest as much as you can and make sure someone is looking after you. Honestly, husbands and mothers should just make dinner and mop floors and tell you to sit down for a bit. It really is worth hanging in there.

Ruby - the ranitidine is keeping the acidity down so the reflux isn't hurting.

If you reduce the ranitidine the acidity will rise and prob hurt again.

Why don't you just give it a while longer? He'd need it if he were ff too - reflux is not related to breast feeding.

Agree with all the others, just wanted to say that things seems to get MUCH easier with breastfeeding at around 3 months so just around the corner for you.
Once things fall into place its much easier to breastfeed, no bottles to prepare, no sterilising, you can feed anytime anywhere, esp easier at night (feeding lying down and co-sleeping can help a lot).
I think lots of babies are v unsettled and sleep badly/sick up loads when they are tiny, the "Baby Bliss" book has a good theory on this that babies are born a trimester too early and for the first 3 months things are often difficult for baby and parents.
www.amazon.co.uk/Baby-Bliss-One-Stop-Months-Beyond/dp/0141007915/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1208 099216&sr=8-1
Hang in there, it gets loads easier.

Also, just a thought the thrashing around during feeding could be due to fat let down, ie your milk coming thick and fast, rather than not enough milk, this is pretty common and some useful info here
www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/baby/fussy-while-nursing.html

Agree with all the others, just wanted to say that things seems to get MUCH easier with breastfeeding at around 3 months so just around the corner for you.
Once things fall into place its much easier to breastfeed, no bottles to prepare, no sterilising, you can feed anytime anywhere, esp easier at night (feeding lying down and co-sleeping can help a lot).
I think lots of babies are v unsettled and sleep badly/sick up loads when they are tiny, the "Baby Bliss" book has a good theory on this that babies are born a trimester too early and for the first 3 months things are often difficult for baby and parents.
www.amazon.co.uk/Baby-Bliss-One-Stop-Months-Beyond/dp/0141007915/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1208 099216&sr=8-1
Hang in there, it gets loads easier.

Also, just a thought the thrashing around during feeding could be due to fat let down, ie your milk coming thick and fast, rather than not enough milk, this is pretty common and some useful info here
www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/baby/fussy-while-nursing.html

whoops, sorry bout that

ruby i made the mistake of giving up bf with dd1 when she was this age thinking formula would help her sleep / stop thrashing around as i thought i didn't have enough milk etc. etc. it didn't help and i regretted stopping bf.
DD2 now 12 weeks and we have regressed r/e sleep and feeding more but this time i know it's just a growth spurt and am going with it in the knowledge that it will turn around soon and it is much easier and nicer to bf imo. I would hold out if you feel sad about giving it up a week can make a great deal of difference.

my gp has advised that DS is on ranitidine until 7/8 months - it goes down to just two doses a day at six months and then the dosage reduces after that. But it needs to be reduced gradually rather than suddenly.

Hello everyone,

Don't know if you'll pick this up or not as it's been a few weeks now but just to thank you again for all your support. I stuck with the breastfeeding and you were all right, it has gotten easier and DS is sleeping much better at night in any case - went through until 4.30am this morning and it was, of course, much easier to lie down and breastfeed him in bed than to give a bottle. His weight gain has slowed but I'm feeling a bit more confident in knowing that this is normal and he is a happy wee baby and seems to be healthy.
Thanks again, this was a lifeline when I nearly chucked in the towel.
RB