anyone managed to settle a bf toddler without bfing at night?

[lilysma]

very specific query, I know, but it's like this...

I bf 17month old dd almost to sleep every night - she's half awake when i put her down but then goes to sleep. I don't really want to wean her - she's a breast fiend and I'm still enjoying it most of the time. However, I need for various reasons (not least having her) to shift career, which ideally would mean taking an evening course once a week. I'd like dh to be able to put her to bed once a week. I could express bm for him to feed her in a cup but she's never had a bottle (refused all attempts when younger).

Does anyone know whether this is possible without completely stopping the evening bf? Or am I on a hiding to nothing expecting her to be so flexible? She's quite a mummy's girl and likes me to be around..

any experiences much appreciated!

Ds1 was b/fed like this until he was 3.3. We found from about your dd's age that if daddy put him to bed, he was fine as he knew daddy didn't have milk. Daddy did, however, have extra stories or something to make up for the lack of milk.

Try it before you commit. I had this problem (just for two nights) when I was in hospital and he was absolutely fine, had extra stories and seemed happy with that. Thought there would be all sorts of trouble, but no, he surprised me as usual.

DD (2.2) will always want a bf if I am there, but she is absolutely fine without it on the rare occasions that I am not.

Give it a go and see - you'll need to be out of the house completely to see if she'll settle completely fo DH. It might be worth trying to move the bf away from bedtime a bit so that its not so closely linked for her if its a problem.

They are amazingly flexible - I have to travel for work, and if I'm not around DS only protests for a very short time about the lack of nunnies (as he currently calls it). His favoured way of drinking milk is through a straw, which is special apparently.

I bf dd until 17mo. The bedtime feed was the one I cut first- as I knew she would be so tired, she would only put up a short fight
She actually only complained the one night, then the next settled normally.
I did wean her completely a week later though- I just told her there was no more mama milk, and she accepted it.

Don't know about the going out thing.
She is still very much a mama's girl - she does really need me at bedtime everyday.
Tonight was the first time she went to bed calmly without me....and she's 2.2.
I had to go back to work this eve, so she was bathed and pjed by me, then I said goodnight and left, and dh did story and put her down.

My DS is only 7 months but he is bf and one night a week I go to an evening class. DH manages fine with a bottle of EBM and actually he settles better for DH if I am not around. If I could express enough I would have DH put him to bed every night to save having to BF him to sleep.