I've finally stopped planning when I'm going to stop BFing, but...

[Swaliswan]

How do I explain this to my family/friends/colleagues? I don't really think that it's any of their business but I do get asked about how long I plan to BF for and now I don't know. I hope to at least get beyond a year (DD is currently 10 mo) but I don't know how long I will BF her for beyond this. My cousin fed her DS for about 3 years and has been condemned by my family.

Does anyone have any suggestions of things that I can say when asked how much longer I'm planning to feed for? I don't want to be rude in my response, just tactful and firm. I've tried pointing out that the WHO recommend BFing for the first two years but even my MIL (a midwife) says that this advise is for women in third world countries.

Your MIL is talking crap.
Absolute crap.
Never assume MWs know useful and relevant info. about b/feeding.They don't because it is barely covered in their training.

It really is noone else's business but yours but if you need to have a reply ready,how about a 'We'll see how we get on?'

Refuse to be drawn any further.

It's simple really,you don't have to explain anything to them,it's none of their business.

I know that sounds patronising maybe but it's your choice/decision.

You just say i'll give up when dd is ready to do so.

Well done for making it this far!!

I am bfing my dd2 who is 18 months atm. Bf her big sis till she was 22 months and her big brother till he was 3 years so who knows what your dd will want to do??

Depends on how rude you want to be really - if they ask when you are feeding then 'Oh, about 10 more minutes' can work, or 'before she starts university'.

Generally, I just say 'at some point, but for now I can eat chocolate and not worry'.

People don't really ask now though - DS is 22 months.

moondog, you made me I don't suppose you know why it is recommended that you BF until LO is at least 2?

www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-benefits.html

I just say "til he's ready to stop"

Because it is the food produced and designed specifically to meet the needs of babies.

Unlike bovine mammary exudence.

Swali, WHO website on b'feeding for you

I honestly don't remember anyone friends or family asking or making comments about length of time i may bf ant of mine tbh.

People have said i can be rather scary so maybe thats why lol

"bovine mammary exudence" I love it

I also found that until dd is ready to stop was the best way forward.

I just say "I have no particular plans to stop"
TBH no one has asked apart from MIL and she was genuinely curious rather than arsey

moondog, I am pmsl at "bovine mammary exudence"! Thanks for the link to the WHO site. I've found the European guidelines and am reading them.

I think that my mum is interested in how long I will BF DD for is because she stopped feeding me at 10 mo as she felt that she had fed me for long enough. My MIL always makes me laugh with her attitude to most things vaguely midwife-related as she is very quick to give advise others but has no experience of what she is advising. I know that guidelines have changed since she had DH and that she doesn't need to have personal experience of something to give professional advice. However, I do get a bit fed up of listening to her telling me that she personally understands my BFing experience when she only BF'd for a maximum of 3 months. She was very pushy when it came to 'encouraging' me to not wean before 6 mo. I try to not listen to her 'advise' any more as I don't find her very helpful.