Overactive letdown and baby with a bad latch

[Floryella]

I think I just need to let this out somewhere… advice or support very welcome

Breastfeeding both my babies has been really hard. With the first I thought I had low supply, not so sure now. She had all sorts of feeding issues somewhat caused by tongue tie but partially I think created by me pressuring her to eat either from breast or bottle. I combi fed til 5 months then just formula which I felt conflicted about at first but then enjoyed.

DS also had a tongue tie but we caught it early this time, in his second week after he lost too much weight. However, he still has a bad latch and even though I make sure he has a good mouthful of boob and is positioned well he ‘clicks’ on the breast, swallowing air and ending up really gassy and miserable. He wakes up a lot towards the end of the night and only settles when held. Farts and cries until he’s comfortable then passes out.

I think I may have a fast let down as he will often pull off the breast with a mouth full of milk and cry or will cough and choke. He pops on and off the breast too which is painful. Sadly doesn’t seem to come with an oversupply or I just have low storage capacity.

He also takes bottles because he was cluster feeding continuously and I couldn’t take it anymore after 8 weeks. He’s better on the bottle but sometimes still clicks, sometimes doesn’t.

I don’t really enjoy breastfeeding to be honest, it has always come with so many issues including pain on let down. I’ve seen multiple lactation consultants and never found a solution. I think I want to stop now and just do bottles (formula not expressed as I hate pumping). There’s a small part of me that’s holding on due to occasional convenience factor, plus wanting him to have antibodies from me since he lives with a toddler big sister who’s always a bit sick. Maybe also a bit sad too as breastfeeding somehow makes him feel like he’s still a part of me?

Has anyone else been in this position? Did anyone manage to wean to just one breastfeed a day and how? I think maybe that’s a good compromise for now. I would prefer not overnight as want to limit his tummy pain and hopefully all get a bit more sleep

Have you tried a different feeding position e.g rugby ball or laying down side to side. I had a fast let down and when my babies were quite small I had to be experimental. I also used a hand pump to express a bit of milk at the start of the feed when the let down was at its most forceful so it didn't choke them.

Thank you, yes, been advised on various positions to give him more control of milk but sadly made no difference. Expressing a bit of milk at first helps with initial choking but not with clicking and pulling off breast.

My second is only 2 weeks but I’m having similar issues to you ☹️ he will latch ok on one breast but it’s painful, the other breast is a struggle with him constantly pulling off and screaming. Waiting for a tongue tie assessment. Have tried loads of positions and had support from multiple midwives/HV etc.

My first BF exclusively for 4 months, then for medical reasons had to start having some formula alongside some BF. I managed to keep doing overnight/bedtime feeds (as that was my preference, understand you may want to choose a different time of day) for about 4 more months. Eventually though mine did lose interest in BF as I think bottle feeding is easier for them and she couldn’t be bothered working for breast milk. I was a bit sad at the time that I’d stopped before I wanted to but she’s 5 now and it’s a distant memory and hasn’t done her any harm so I don’t feel guilty. Good luck xx

Thanks @modgepodge

Did you wean gradually to the feeds you wanted and your body just worked out to still have milk available at those times? Last time I fully weaned at 5 months so unsure how partial weaning works

Yea I think so. Mine wouldn’t take formula initially as she was fully BF, so I had to express and mix formula and breast milk for a bit, gradually increasing the formula until it was 100%. I don’t remember struggling with engorgement or anything.