Question for FFing mums

[swmum]

I'm considering ff my baby from the start (37 weeks at the mo) and wondered if I should feed on demand in the early days or aim for the three/four hour routine that my mum and her friends say worked a treat for them?
I've read a lot about ff babies going for longer between feeds - is that true?
Any tips would be great. Especially for the early days.
Also what formula would you recommend?
My mates have said Aptimal and Dr Brown's bottles - any opinions?
Thanks!

i would feed on demand for first few months as appetite fluctuates so much

not sure on recommending formula i used sma gold did want to bf but too many meds after birthand hospital recommended it and it suited ds

and avent bottles

my ds fed evry hour for first few days every 2-3 then every 3-4 by 3 mths i think

feed on demand

new borns should not go 4 hours between feeds , they are too little, and need feeding far more frequently

they have tiny stomachs that need filling little and often

aiming for 3 - 4 hours between feeds is going to get you and baby very upset

also, formula fed babies have growth spurts too and there will be periods of time where they feed non stop

formula fed babies might go a bit longer between feeds , but not from birth and not for hours longer

the formula to go for is the one you can buy from the all night garage/corner shop etc. when you get to the 2 am feed and you have run out ( it happens!_) and perhaps one that comes in liquid form too....for convenience sake, formula is pretty much all the same

as for bottles, i always used bog standard avent/ tommee tippee, cheap and cheerful , changing the teats as the babies got older

swmum, best to have an open mind about feeding - your mum and her friends may not have crystal clear memories of the early days

We know babies are upset if they have to wait to be fed - they don't understand about patience or waiting, and when they are in the uterus they feed as and when they feel like it. Continuing this when the baby is 'out' makes them feel comforted and secure, and allows them to find their own feeding pattern.

This whole thing is one of the reasons why breastfeeding can be easier, as it is quicker to respond with a breast rather than a bottle

There's no solid evidence about ff babies going longer between feeds, but plenty of observation that yes, there is a tendency for this, because breastmilk takes less 'work' for the baby to digest. Individual babies vary, of course.

You could try breastfeeding and see how you get along with it - you might surprise yourself

I ffed ds from 2 weeks due to problems bfing. I fed on demand - it was about every 2 hours, same as my bfing chums!

Dont get pushed into breastfeeding I tried and tried in hospital and got zero support from anyone and then was made to feel like a crap mum for bottle feeding my baby. I bottle fed my second one two and both have turned out just fine. I had cow and gate with my ds and aptimal with dd aptimal was very good and I would give that a thumbs up. The nice thing about ff is your dp, grandparents ect can help out with feed time and you can have a little rest. Good luck

Feed on demand - DD though was a huge sleeper and use to wake every 3 to 4 hours for a feed at the start.

Don't force feed everything in the bottle.

Didn't find any difference between AVent and Dr Brown bottles.

We started on SMA but changed to Cow and GAte as she was constipated and windy and took her for cranial ostopothy and she had done some reserach and found that this could be a problem fro some babies

Thanks for the advice ladies. Laughalot I know what you mean about being made to feel crap, but I've seen so many cases like yours where the ff babies go on to thrive (I'm one, dh is one, as are so many of my mates) so I'm going to go with what feels right for me. And at the moment that is formula.
I'm sorry you had to go through feeling guilty. I'm sure people will try to do the same to me when he's out, but I'm going to do what suits me and my family just as you did - good for you!

feed on demand.

At 5 months ds3 takes as much or as little of his 8oz bottles between every 3 and 6 hours. With dd1 (my 1st) i did the 4 hour thing religiously, but have found demand feeding much easier.

As for bottles I always buy the own brand wide necked ones.

Both my children are healthy weights ect. I was bottle fed so was my dh I hate getting into the bf/ff debate. I was open minded I tried bf I dident get help so ff and all has turned out fine. People seem to think you are harming your baby if they arent bf. As someone just posted avent bottles are very good too. My lo fed probably every 2/3 hours when newborn and after a few months every 3/4 hours.

what you could do is feed like a breastfeeder, especially in the early days, skin to skin contact with your baby, concentrate, make eye contact, snuggle her in really close and make it a pleasruable experience and a close one for you both, rather than simply 'giving a bottle'

I would agree with that Lulu, I few of my friends bottle fed from the start and the main thing I felt was that it lacked a closeness, very often one of my friends would leave her newborn in the car seat and just hold the bottle. On the odd occasion she fed in a cuddly manner it just felt nicer if you know what I mean.

SWC. i got DH to feed DD like that, mostly so i could snort with laughter when she pulled his chest hair out

if people want to be helpful, they can change nappies, make meals, wind the baby,.....feeding in the first few days should be more about the mum and baby connecting and having close time IMO, getting to know each other, rather than grandparents, friends etc all insisting on feeding the baby

Aaarg I couldnt ff and not hold them though that is a bit sad feeding them in the carseat . Those cuddles are special.

JingleyJen - did you ask your friend why she fed her baby in the carseat?

I'm surprised by how many people I see not cuddling their baby while they feed. It comes across as really inpersonal. Girl in the bed next to be at hosp balanced her baby on her knees facing her while she fed,

i just couldn't imagine ever wanting to feed like that. I love feeding my lo, i love just gazing at each other and feeling him close to me.

I did and had my head bitten off as she thought I was critisising her for FF - which I wasn't, I just couldn't understand why she didn't want to feel the enjoyment of a great cuddle with her little one.
The times she did it like that usually coincided with me BFing DS1 ..

SWC don't mind you asking at all.
Not sure if you remember me starting another thread about this last week - think I called it 'am I terrible mother for not wanting to bf'?
I thought you posted on it that's why I asked.
Basically I just don't like the idea of it. FF just seems much more straight forward to me - but that could be because I was ff and my mum and loads of my mates have been singing its praises.
I want to get my body back to myself and don't like the idea of feeding the baby from my boobs. Not phobia, just doesn't appeal to me at all. Want to be able to let dh feed him too.
Have a good friend who is bf and really struggling - says it's painful (which I know it's not always but lots of women say it is) and exhausting. She says people have told her to express but it's not as simple as that. Sounds like hell quite frankly! I'm a person who loves routine and I really don't want to bf on demand. Seems ff helps with routine etc from the research I've done.
Bf seems very tying and I just don't think it will fit in with my way of life or my attitude to my body.
And having seen so many of my peers who were ff thrive - and now so many of their kids do the same on ff - I really don't feel I'll be harming my baby if I don't bf.
Yes there are lots of stats bf advocates will quote me to agrue the opposite but I don't think that it's as clear cut as the stats make it appear. There are many other elements to be considered. For example I don't think that my son will grow up to be obese just because I give him formula.
So that's my reasoning. I know lots of folk won't agree and prob call me names for my logic, but I don't really care.
My life, my baby and all I can do is my best. That's all any of us can do really.

Thanks again for all your advice ladies.

SWMUM - I have no desire to sway you either way on whether to ff or bf, its entirely your choice.

Would however like to say IME ff babies and routine don't automatically go hand in hand. I recently had DC4, all ff, and they've all been individuals who seems to enforce their own routine or lack of it on the rest of us

swmum - if I was you I'd be going for the cheapest possible formula, which at the moment I think is Farleys. Round here there's £3 a tin price difference between Farley's and Aptimel.

Millions of adults today were reared on very basic formulas with no added prebiotics/nucleotides/'super' ingredients. I don't think any of these people would say that it's made a identifiable difference to their health.

And it's very true that it's your life and your baby. I'm sure you've considered this choice from every angle, including thinking about the pros and cons of bottlefeeding from your baby's point of view as well as from your own because of course the only person who's going to be affected by this decision apart from you will be your baby - you only have to answer to them not to anyone else. As long as you can say you've made an informed decision, based on the facts and not on just anecdotal evidence then you'll have done the right thing.

The cost can be an issue of course, but I personally would consider using a formula which is supplemented with LCPs (fatty acids). I mixed fed dd and used Aptamil which is one of these.

LCPs occur naturally in breast milk and have been shown to be important for brain development. However, the evidence as to whether they are beneficial when added to formula is not conclusive so you may prefer to go with the traditional formula. As Sabire said, many of us grew up on it with no apparent ill effects. Some info here.

Hope this helps. Good luck!

when I gave aptamil it came out a lot more like bf poo at the other end then the formula I had used for my elder dd.

cargirl, dd's too... but i recently discovered that might just be because some of the ingredients in it have a laxative effect so i don't think i'd use it again. i was quite upset to find that out, actually. in NZ some of those LCPs aren't allowed as well.

personally, if there's a next time and i don't crack the bfing, i think i might try one of the organic ones and just give dd fish oil.
good luck with the birth, swmum.

well my youngest 3 were increasing bf - dd2 fully until my return to work at 4 months, then 6 months, then 11 months when the youngest self weaned off milk completely! Anyhow with dd1 having been completely FF I can hand on heart say the struggles I had bf the others was easier in the long run than the work of fully FF the eldest - the times I remembered at 10.30pm I'd forgotten to make up the bottles - argh!