have to top up 3mo - slow weight gain

[Liz79]

I have posted a couple of times previously about my now 3mo DD who has been slow to gain weight. On friday she crossed a second centile (down to 25th from 75th). I was given the choice of domperidone, formula top ups or EBM top ups. I chose EBM top ups. I have been expressing and offering since friday evening and now have almost a pint of useless EBM in my fridge which she wouldn't take. I am going to make a rice pudding from it later today . I first tried tommee tippee bottle as she has been having this once a week and was ok with it. But on the first top up she jsut played with it for 45 mins. Was about to give up and decided to pour it into avent bottle and try that. She took 50mls. She was offered avent all night and refused and then refused tommee tippee again yesterday morning. So of I went to mothercare to get their orthodontic teats (which they told me wouldn't fit avent bottles but they do!!). DD will suck on this teat merrily but bugger all comes out, the bottles I had to buy came with nuby teats and she seemt a little more interested in this than avent, plus it comes out easier than the orthodontic ones. The problem I have is she plays with all the straight teats and pushes them out with her tongue, unless she is quite hungry (friday evening bf wasn't very good). She will suck the orthodontic teat but nothing comes out of it.

What will I do? Do nuk teats flow faster than the mothercare ones and do they fit mothercare/avent or tommee tippee bottles or do I need to buy theirs? When I shake the orthodontic bottle upside down, nothing comes out. I found I have to squeeze it in a very particular way to get any out.

DH thinks this is all pointless and its just winding up me and DD and we are going to be knackered because of night time expressing and messing with bottles. He thinks its pointless as he thinks she eats till she is full and won't take the bottle as she isn't hungry. We both think she is fine and just doesn't have a big appetite.

Also I have been doing weight watchers, started shortly after the first time she didn't gain much. I have lost 10.5lbs in 5 weeks. when I took DD to the gp as told to after crossing the centile, I asked him if i should stop ww and he said no immediately - your milk supply is your bodies first priority, it won't be affected. I think I might have an extra couple of points a day as I have lost weight quite quickly I think? Will decide after mondays weigh in. Good weight loss isn't normally a concern for me!!

My baby did the 'catch down' thing as well, she was at the 95/98 percentile when born and dropped to the 50 percentile and stayed there or there abouts.

Liz79 - can't understand why there is concern here at all. Your baby is gaining weight. If you start forcing bottles you may end up with a baby who starts breast refusing because she is getting forced to eat when she doesn't want to and that certainly will result in weightloss.

I would stick to breast only TBH and ditch the scales!

Liz79 please - if your baby is gaining weight, is happy in herself and making plenty of wet/pooey nappies then leave it be!

I know how you feel - it is scary watching a lo cross centiles. My dd was 75th at birth and 25 by 3 months. A friend who hadn't seen her for weeks said 'OMG she is so thin - is she ok?' which of course freaked me out considerably!

It took her till about 4 months to find where she wanted to grow - between the 9th + 2nd centile and that's where she's stayed since - she is now nearly 10 months old.

I think some babies are born bigger than they are 'meant' to be for a number of reasons - mine perhaps because I lived on a LOT of cookie dough ice cream in the last month of pregnancy.

My dd was happy in herself + growing, just not massive amounts. Someone has to be the skinny baby! i was v v v lucky as all HCP I encountered gave me nothing but support and reassurance - I can only imagine how it must feel to have HCP pressuring you to top up.

As so many others have said, if you hadn't seen the charts, would you worry?

Also if she seems ok to you, stop getting her weighed all the time! It can be (pardon the following) a colossal mindfuck and NOT the best/only indication of health.

Morning all.

BF midwife has been and she also thinks she is absolutely fine, not sure how she has crossed the centiles as she is chubby! She was expecting a lollipop baby! She said although the chart has dropped 2 centiles, having seen the baby she wouldn't of referred her. She is trying to hurry up the appointment anyway (which I feel obliged to attend now the GP has put the wheels in motion and also to hear it from the horses mouth) and said stop the top ups. She has gained 2.5oz over the weekend, with just 2 effective top ups.

Feeling much better now. Like everyone has said its not just about the charts, the baby says more.

Thanks for all your support over the weekend, it really helped.

Yahhhhyyyy!

Go on, cancel the appointment - you know you want to!

yay here too for sensible MW! But you were put through this in the first place.

Cancel! Cancel! Cancel! Cancel! Cancel!

have only read the OP but wanted to quickly say.. Have a look at my profile for ds2 who was 75th centile born and now resides on the 25th after sliding non sensationally at 3-5mths.
what you're eating shag all impact on your breastmilk either. Really!!! I lost tons of weightcearly on with all 3 of my kids. One giant, one itsy girl and now ds2.
I've never had any pressure to top up as I've appeared unconcerned, secure and unmoveable. Plus assured my baby was fine in himself I just stopped going to clinic so often and oh the relaxation of it! If your dd is developing normally. Gaining regularly generally happy then you can just get on with demand feeding. Some babies are just happier on the 25th centile mine sure is!!!

my baby was refusing to feed then i read tyhat it may be because i wasn't eating enough fat to make the hindmilk rich, so just making lots of foremilk which although is more watery fills up babies quicker cos of high lactose. so yes i think you should go easy on ww. eat good fats though like olive oil dressing and avocado and almonds and olives. these will all be good for figures too. fruit is high in simple sugars so its not that good for bm or weighht loss. have carrots instead

also my midwife is a bit stupid and regularly records the wrong weight or writes the wrong thing in the red book so be aware, and you can't tell them!

Agree with the majority -it is (usually) perfectly normal for babies to slide down the centiles. Mine was 91st and went to 25th. I got stressed and worrying and in the end just annoyed him i think, forcing him to eat!
He is now a perfectly normal, nearly 3 year old who eats a varied, healthy diet and is about average size as far as i can see(when he turned 2 he was about the 40th centile).
Your DH sounds very sensible. If baby is happy, has wet/dirty nappies and is sleeping ok then she will be fine.

Thanks for all your messages of support, its great to hear about other people in the same situation. Interestingly no one has posted about their dc who slid down the centiles and actually had a problem we are seeing the consultant in the morning, I want to go just to hear it from her that there really is nothing the matter, even though I know she is fine there is a wee bit of me that goes "what if", so I want to hear it from the horses mouth so to speak! Feel a bit guilty about stealing an appointment from a sick child when mine is apparently healthy, but my dd comes first

cosima - what you read is wrong. The type of fat you eat does affect the type of fat in the breastmilk, but not in a 'rich' or 'non rich' way. It doesn't matter what sort of fat you eat in terms of quaity of nutrition - it's all good stuff that gets into the baby

Hi everyone

We are just back from seeing the consultant and she listened to DD's chest, felt her tummy and femoral pulses, had a look between her legs and did her head circumference. Then she told me what I already knew - she's fine, some babies are born bigger/smaller than they are really meant to be and have to find their way and catch up/down. You don't necessarily stay on the centile you are born on, babies move across them in both directions. Plus vast majority of babies are ff and that is what the charts are based on (bf mw is bringing me a bf chart). DD is all in proportion, she's not fat or thin and she has a nice covering on her bones. Plus she said she is very grown up for 3 months Conclusion - she's fine, get on with it, get her weighed less (also said pfb's are weighed religiously, DC2 will be lucky to get weighed once a month). Think I will get her weighed every 3 weeks instead of fortnightly.

I am so happy and relieved my dd is ok

Hurray!

I would suggest even bigger gaps between weighs - if you don't feel you can give up weighing altogether, how about once a month?

Liz79, I would be careful about using a different chart. The common UK90 chart used is not a bottle feeding chart, but rather based on babies who's feeding was not differentiated.

The breastfeeding WHO chart will actually show your child as even lighter than the UK90 chart did, as breastfed babies typically gain more weight in the first four months than FF babies and then their weight gain slows.

Really I would not weigh your daughter more than necessary, less is more in weighing terms. It is more important that she is a healthy thriving baby with good outputs (poo/wee), weight in that case mean nothing.

My second child will only be weighed until he/she regains birthweight and I will not be weighing them again unless a health issue arises. So many HVsflapping growth charts around and all they seem to do is cause a lot of upset and undetermine mothers confidence.

Babies everywhere, I know the charts are based on the whole population (which is reasonable IMO) but the vast majority of that population is bottle fed. I feel a bf chart would be more appropriate - even though the picture would probably look worse. She is clinically well and thats all that really matters. Bloody charts, don't know why we bother. Suspect MWs might want to weigh her more than 3 weekly but I will say "Dr x said weigh her less frequently". DR implied a month was a long time when she said DC2 are lucky to get weighed once a month, and that fortnightly was too much when she said do it less. Therefore I think 3 weeks is happy medium iyswim

"Bloody charts, don't know why we bother"
LOL, Don't then. You don't have to have your child weighed, especially as the consultant says she is fine.